With Tom Friedman on Vacation...

Cat-fancier extraordinaire Kevin Drum let's us know that America's conservatives have bravely stepped in to fill the dearth "we haven't heard political insights from cabbies reaffirming our world view" that has existed ever since Friedman took a sabbatical (undoubtedly to collect such anonymous missives in book form).

Mickey Kaus wrote:

Passenger: "Fleet Center, please."

Boston cab driver (an immigrant): "You like John Kerry, eh?"

Passenger: "Well, I'm a Democrat but I don't really like Kerry that much."

Cab driver: "I hear that all day. All day. 'I don't like Kerry.' Why you pick him if you don't like him?"

Missing from that alleged transcript, Mickey asking "Where do the local mediterranean restaurants go for their lambs?" Mickey wants to make sure they are good and tender.

Meanwhile, self-proclaimed libertarian -- and well-known delusional nutjob Neal Boortz found himself another cabbie to advise him that the world is EXACTLY as Neal says:

Had a Boston taxi driver yesterday from Iraq. He's going back home to visit his parents in a few weeks. He was none-too-pleased with the Democrats. He believes that Democrats hate his country and want Saddam to be back in power. He was adamant that things are much better in Iraq than the media is saying ... and he's at a loss as to why all of these media types won't tell the truth.

Coming soon, Rush Limbaugh meet's a cab-driver that says "we Arabs love our sodomy, don't let somebody else tell you otherwise."

Sean Hannity meets Mustafa, a cabbie that thinks "Democrats are all communists and pinko wimps, not like decorated fighter pilot George W. Bush".

Ann Coulter meets "Abdul, a cabbie who goes on and on about how he wishes somebody would make him convert to the Jesus via the barrel of a gun."

How convenient for them. If I were Tommy-Boy, I'd take my Walrus-Mustache right over to my anonymous foreign-born attorney and sue them for violating my trademark.

On-Time Wednesday

Done right at 11 p.m. Eastern on the dot, the prime-time "hour of power" that is the 2004 Democratic Convention.


Dennis Kucinich reacts in glee as he thinks he spies an Oliphant. (Ed: You are such a goddamned geek)


Retired Joint Chief's Chairman John Shalikashvili shows off his killer Donald Rumsfeld impression.


A worker at the Bush/Cheney War Room in Boston takes time to do the sort of productive computer work most do -- actively searching for the porn. Apparently, Bush War Rooms are a growing business, given their proliferation, Baghdad, Khandihar, Kabul, Fallujah, Mosul, and opening soon in Damascus and Tehran.


Gulp!


Florida, the home of competent and fair voting, on occasion, casts its 89, er, 77, er, 105 votes for...um, I'm sorry we forgot to write down the vote totals.


Too bad that "Hope is on the Way" line caught DNC folks off guard huh?


A Special Message to Chris Matthews, Britt Hume, and Judy Woodruff.


You cannot spell high class and quality without Billy Baldwin. Oh, and Bianca Jagger, also still alive. But where are the bloggers?


Well, Mickey Kaus was too preoccupied to attend last night.

Another Night of a an Excellent Convention Speech

Edwards managed to do what is so difficult in politics, give a very good speech, underlying the important themes of the party (including some real, live, proudly liberal rhetoric) yet not make it so good that Kerry cannot eclipse it. He is an extremely likeable man, as is the rest of his family. He also portrayed competence and gave just the right balance of promises and detail.

Dick Cheney has never given a speech anywhere close to it, and never will.

One last thing on Obama, The Daily Show, reminded me of Obama's being the descendant of goat herders. I do believe that Mickey Kaus will now be on board, hoping for a fix up.

I just Posted about Cheney so...

Can a Halliburton post be far behind?

Holden, over at Atrios provided a link to this story and it pretty much sums up the whole smelly business of the joys of outsourcing and how Dicky-Poo's former company is one tax-payer ripoff scheme artists...or too incompetent to exist:

Halliburton Co. has lost $18.6 million of government property in Iraq, about a third of the items it was given to manage, including trucks, computers and office furniture, government auditors claim.

The auditors couldn't account for 6,975 of 20,531 items on the ledgers of Halliburton's KBR unit, according to a report by Stuart Bowen, auditor for the coalition provisional authority inspector general.

Halliburton is providing services to U.S. troops under a contract that has generated $3.2 billion in revenue so far

.

Oy.

That DICK -- Not much of a Historian

The Witch King of Angmar Vice President of the United States, Dick Cheney has been tilting his head and mumbling out growly speeches for the re-appointment campaign of President Bush this week.

Yesterday, in California, perceiving the populace as being as stupid as he always does, Dick laid out the reason it is important to re-elect Commander Bunnypants.

"Terrorist attacks are not caused by the use of strength. They are invited by the perception of weakness," Cheney said at Camp Pendleton on the Southern California coast.

Yes, Dicky-poo, that philosophy has worked so fucking fantastic for the last 50 years for the Israelis and the Palestinians.

Dicky boy, there are all sorts of other examples from history that can be thrown out there too. Showing strength sure worked well for oh, Charles I; the Romanovs; Mussollini; the Pulahvis.

Oh sure, it certainly is not good to be seen as weak, but when your enemy finds out the limitations of your strength...as in Lebanon 1982, and Iraq today and now Sudan today, THAT IS WHEN YOU ARE REALLY, TRULY, POSITIVELY, SQUARELY, SUCCINCTLY, CHENEYED.

Meanwhile in other NON-Convention News; Hey, Iraq still really, really Fucked

At least 51 68 dead from a giant carbomb in Iraq. Kidnappings every day, deaths every day. Worst event in months, and the worst since Potemkin Sovereignty was allowed to "reign".

This occurred at a police recruiting location. Again, planned and executed.
Coming soon, the Arabic Emanuel Goldstein will be assigned blame.

Allawi is decidedly not the power in anywhere but a portion of Baghdad.

Though the press coverage may decrease because, amazingly, Wolfowitz's criticism of the press for not going out will operate in reverse, its too dangerous out there. Like the journalist, American Troops will, I'm sure as the election comes closer be put into defensive bunker locations to decrease casualties, while the outlaying area goes to shit.

It is OPERATION HOLD-ON at the White House being engaged, absolutely the worst course of action the Bush Administration could take to American interests, but the best he can do for his own reelection interests. Funny, how when those two have met in the past, the latter always seems to win.

It will be interesting after November 2nd, how Bush rules (if he doesn't suspend the election of course) after he is defeated and is a lame(r) duck. Without his shallow personal desire for power to hold on to, will he allow the best policy to be followed, or will he act like a petulent ten-year old and do something idiotic. Boy, I don't like those odds.

Pounding the Gavel...

Is not just a euphamism for Attaturk's sex life. Another convention day in pictures.


In a shocking moment, Governor Howard Dean pummelled Robert Novak and Tucker Carlson to a bloody pulp.


Meanwhile, David Brooks prepared to call this man a "credit to his race" and "quite eloquent for a black guy". Attaturk on the other hand, is prepared to call David Brooks incredibly insipid even for a New York Times Columnist.


After delivering an excellent speech, Teresa Heinz continues to piss off the GOP by being rich, liberal, and wearing one of Nancy's dresses.


Wow, Billy Baldwin's still alive. Not that I had been wondering.


GOP..."But we have Zell Miller speaking to us"...well whoop'die shit.


This is Zell Miller and his two dogs, "Rick" and "Santorum".


Iowa first lady Christie Vilsack walks out to address the convention, wonder where they put Iowa's delegation?


Meanwhile, in breaking news Dick Cheney surprisingly arrived in Boston.

Well, Let me be the 7,539,342nd to Say

Barack Obama is probably going to be running for President (and winning) someday. What a presence, what a story.

...although David "living putz" Brooks, just because a guy is african-american that doesn't mean you are should make a "Tiger Woods" reference. Stupid dumbass.

Yet even as we speak, there are those who are preparing to divide us, the spin masters and negative ad peddlers who embrace the politics of anything goes. Well, I say to them tonight, there's not a liberal America and a conservative America — there's the United States of America. There's not a black America and white America and Latino America and Asian America; there's the United States of America. The pundits like to slice-and-dice our country into Red States and Blue States; Red States for Republicans, Blue States for Democrats. But I've got news for them, too. We worship an awesome God in the Blue States, and we don't like federal agents poking around our libraries in the Red States. We coach Little League in the Blue States and have gay friends in the Red States. There are patriots who opposed the war in Iraq and patriots who supported it. We are one people, all of us pledging allegiance to the stars and stripes, all of us defending the United States of America.

Meanwhile, today Attaturk departs Reno and leaves all of his new Landlord buddies behind. Faretheewell slumlordin' dudes.

Does this look like Freedom?

While we are engrossed in the Democratic National Convention and the National Property Managers Convention, Lest we forget... there is a war, peacekeeping, situation continuing in Iraq. The International Coalition of Academics Against Occupation address several deeply depressing trends in Iraq. One of the most disturbing is the destruction of the intellectual culture of Iraq. Yeah, we have certainly brought freedom to Iraq, eh?

Even after the ‘transfer of authority’ the U.S. Government remains in de facto military occupation of Iraq. The idea that the escalation of violence can be put to an end by the ‘interim’ government, while 140,000 U.S troops remain in control of major Iraqi cities like Mosul and Baghdad, is far from the reality on the ground.

Overlooked by the U.S. Press is the escalating assassination of Iraqi academics, intellectuals, and lecturers. More than 250 college professors since April 30, 2003, according to the Iraqi Union of University Lecturers, have been the targets of assassination. Among the 250 professors assassinated to date include: Muhammad al-Rawi, President of Baghdad University (July 27, 2003); Dr. Abdul Latif al-Mayah a Professor of Political Science at Baghdad's Mustansiriya University (late January 2003); Dr. Nafa Aboud, a Professor of Arabic Literature at the University of Baghdad; Dr Sabri al-Bayati; a Geographer at the University of Baghdad; Dr. Falah al-Dulaimi, Assistant Dean of College at Mustansariya University; Dr. Hissam Sharif, Department of History of the University of Baghdad; and Professor Wajih Mahjoub of the College of Physical Education.

Why Stewart Rules the News

I know we all hate the cut and paste method, but I thought that this commentary was too perfect to pass up.

Note to Tom Brokaw: Why I get my hard news from Jon Stewart
A BUZZFLASH READER CONTRIBUTION
by Ruth Lopez

Sunday morning, wanting to see some of the run-up to the Democratic convention, I turned on CNN. There was Judy Woodruff, talking to a Kerry spokesperson. In thanking him for the interview, for her closing line, she said, "Spoken like a true, loyal Kerry man." Did I hear that right, I thought? Because it sounded to me like a backhanded way to imply that he said what he said just because he works for Kerry? A sly way to discredit the speaker; slip in the line, close the segment.

Then, because the Republicans have a "rapid response war room" at the Dems' convention, Ms. Woodruff interviewed one of the ex-Enron lobbyists that now have jobs shilling for Cheney/Bush. I waited to see how she would close the interview with him. First, I had to listen to the same old tired list of Republican "talking point" lies: Kerry voted to raise taxes 350 times (lie), Kerry is a flip flopper (lie), Kerry is the most liberal senator (lie, but I wouldn't care if he was). On and on, and not once did Ms. Woodruff challenge or question the statements made. When he was done, she thanked him sweetly for his time, as if it had been a burden for him to have had to do all that heavy lifting for lil ol' her. Yuck. I turned to MSNBC. No better. They were all so excited to have a "rabid response team" throwing them treats that they were practically salivating on their mics.

Later in the day, while watching CSPAN, there was Ms. Woodruff again, along with a panel of other esteemed TV news professionals: Brokaw, Jennings, Rather. They were discussing the sad state of news reporting during the lead up to war. Yes, they admitted that they all reported the war build-up wrong. They didn't ask hard enough questions. They were cowed by an aggressive and hostile administration. They were afraid to buck the hyper patriotism in the lead-up to the war.

Then, I almost choked on my pretzel, Brokaw bemoaned the fact that so many young people think that The Daily Show is an acceptable way to get real news.

Note to Brokaw, Jennings, et al. You didn't just misreport the insane drive to start an unnecessary, pre-emptive war, you were part of the hyper patriotic, jingoistic drumbeat. And it isn't just that you didn't do enough to question it, it's that you didn't do anything. And you still aren't. Your pathetic CSPAN mea culpa, seen by less than 1% of the country, is even less impressive when you go right back to your studio and keep carrying water for the Bush Administration, ala Ms. Woodruff.

As for why young people think that The Daily Show is a good source of real news, ask yourself this: When the vice-president of the United States is caught, on TV, publicly lying about leading this country into a war where almost 1000 of our young people have needlessly died, and then later states, again on TV, that he never said what he said, why is it that the only "news" show to play the side by side tapes of him lying, and then denying what he said, is The Daily Show? Why wasn't that headline news on every news show? " Vice President denies saying what we have him on tape saying, soldiers dying every day because of it." That's news, but I have to watch Comedy Central to see it. What's wrong with this picture, Mr. Brokaw?

And it isn't just young people who are turning to Jon Stewart for news dressed up as comic relief. I'm old enough to remember another time when we had a VP like Cheney. Spiro Agnew, Nixon's VP, pleaded no contest to charges of tax fraud and resigned. Apparently, Agnew had illegal payments -- which he called legitimate political contributions (in unmarked envelopes containing as much as $20,000 at a time) -- delivered directly to his vice presidential office! Sound like anyone we know? Somewhere from Hell I'm sure Agnew is smiling up at Cheney.

Every one of the top news people sitting on that CSPAN panel should remember Agnew's disgrace; they're old enough, they were all around then. And then, like now, the news media toadied up to the Nixon Administration until the weight of evidence in Watergate became unavoidably massive.

Now it's gotten so bad that flacks like CNN's Kelli Arena can proclaim that Osama Bin Laden is a Kerry supporter and she still has a job. (Kelli, how often do you and Osama talk?)

What's it going to take this time, Mr. Brokaw? Because apparently you news guys have forgotten. Today, once again, you and the other infotainment anchors posing as news people dither and dawdle and pander to this corrupt administration and cry hot little tears of self-recrimination in the quiet corners of CSPAN and then trot right back to your "news" desks and do it all again.

One good hour of self-flagellation in the desert of CSPAN and you feel so refreshed!

Meanwhile this country is again taken for a ride, one that puts Nixon and Agnew to shame, and now, like then, more of our young people die every day for lies.

You know, Mr. Brokaw, you guys aren't kids any more. What are you afraid of? You've made your fortunes. Even if you got fired today, you'll never be out on the street starving. How about finding your courage, and speaking some cold, hard facts: This country was lied into war. The vice president is a war profiteer who is being investigated for taking bribes and doing illegal business with sanctioned countries. Try it. Walter Cronkite could give some advice on this. Bill Moyers is out there trying to do it, I bet he'd like some company. Try grabbing yourself by your manly parts and standing up for the truth.

I bet you'd find an audience then. Hell, I'd watch every day.

Ruth Lopez
Orlando, FL

Sometimes we all must live in Hell, but Heaven is just beneath us - George Huntley "Inside my Head", from the album Fun and Games

You can Talk up Boston all you Want

What with your bloggers and their DNC parties, their celebrity citings, their ability to use the restrooms at the site.

You haven't lived until you've done Karaoke with a bunch of drunken landlords and real estate agents, as shown below. It's like living a night with all the people you'll find at Craigslist.com - only more felonious.



Fortunately, this morning I woke up alone, and with only a couple incriminating, compromising, photographs being used for blackmail.

I swear I have NEVER seen that airedale before.

Bad news for Bush?

While the democrats are focused on beating Bush apparently there are some modest areas of disagreement. You know earth shattering arguments such as their position on oppsoing the Iraqi war. That is, how much they should oppose the war.

A Globe poll of delegates -- mostly party activists who tend to be more liberal than mainstream Democrats -- indicated that 95 percent now believe the United States should never have gone to war in Iraq, a position somewhat at odds with the man preparing to claim the presidential nomination, John F. Kerry, who has said only that he would not have gone to war ''the way Bush did."

Most party leaders hope Kerry's convention speech can satisfy those who opposed the war from the start and avoid reopening divisions from the primaries, when former Vermont governor Howard Dean decried many of his rivals as ''Bush lite."

But they do not want Kerry to go as far as Dean in denouncing Bush's decision to go to war, but rather concentrate on issues like casualties and the cost of rebuilding Iraq without international support.

While it is important to have the dems focused against Bush it is also important to realize that on the issue of the Iraq war, Kerry is not as far removed from Bush as some of us might like him to be. But it is still a move in the right direction.

Another problem for Bush is that the 9-11 Report is a best seller:

The 9/11 Commission Report, released Thursday, is selling so briskly that its publisher announced a second printing Monday.

W.W. Norton, which published the $10 paperback in cooperation with the bipartisan federal panel that investigated the 2001 terrorist attacks, estimates it sold 350,000 copies through Sunday.

With bookstores from Portland, Ore., to Washington, D.C., out of stock, Norton says it's printing another 200,000 copies in addition to the 600,000-copy first printing.

I wonder if this means that people will start to put the pieces of the puzzle together and see Bush as dangerous as we all know that he truly is. Sorry Sully the silly, but Bush is a danger, the problem is that you know it too, don't you? You should.

Oh, am I supposed to "bend over" and be nice now?

So Sully endorsed Kerry, and said nice things to an extent about the Democrats.

Well, until this last line.

Remember when we were one as a nation? Do you really think that president Bush is capable of bringing any of us together again? Of course, some Democrats are responsible for exactly that polarization. But it's nevertheless a smart move to portray themselves as a unifying future compared to the divisive past.

Oh, yes, "some democrats are responsible"...not "contributed" or not "also responsible", just "responsible."

No, nobody like Sully ever called the opponents of the Iraqi "kick ass kickoff" appeasers; nor did he ever imply they were traitors, not just to their society but civilization. And God knows, by emphasizing things like Gay Marriage, and implying their opponents were un-american wussies, the Bush Administration certainly played no fucking part in dividing the country.

Remember the term "WEDGE ISSUE" Andy pants? Forgetting that you yourself have both pushed the wedge and been staked upon its leading edge by the beflightsuited manly man you so once adored, and still want to?

You right these craptastic missives and expect to be paid money, when there are hundreds of more eloquent bloggers doing it for free?

Uh-huh.

DNC Pictoral Bliss Blitz

Just because I'm not there (ed: Could you fucking whine any more you miserable bastard?) doesn't mean I cannot caption some of the events of the day in Boston and elsewhere.


"Obviously", Tucker Carlson opinined, "don't let the smiling faces fool you, nor the speech, nor the statements otherwise. The Clinton's still believe that Hillary will be elected President in 2004."


When did Patty LaBelle become "hot", and her hair "normal"?


Oh, let's just get it out of the way, future Drudge top of the page picture.


In the land of the just, President Al Gore accepts his parties nomination for his re-election, while George W. Bush accepts a job as the Vice-President of Marketing at Texas largest Car Dealership, RRRRRRRRRRR!


"Which of these two am I supposed to try to marry first?"


Al and Tipper Gore impersonate President Bush and Tony Blair


Everybody hesitated momentarily as Senator Mikulski went over to the pole to begin her dance routine.


Behold, the power of the Clenis.


Behold, the power of the...ok, let's not go too far here.


Another normal vacation day in Crawford, Texas for the President.


RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! Dick Cheney is being flirtatious. Eiyeeeeeeeee! Oh, sorry, it was just gas.


The Bush Administration classified a New Weapon of Mass Destruction yesterday.




That's right, two, count 'em two, falling off the bike jokes in one post.

LOL....Read this...

From "Red State Diaries" (wasn't that a Showtime show with a lot of soft-core porn years ago?) comes this post.

Right now, Attaturk is attempting to get ready for another heady day at the National Property Managers Convention here in Reno, but I hope to get some time soon to caption this mighty series of pictures on this site. I think I may be able to do something with them.

BTW, Attaturk got outed in Reno. Here is my picture.

Societal Double Standards

God forbid, the wife of a politician have opinions and be her own independent thinker and strong-willed.

Such a woman will be pilloried by interviews, implying that well...she's a BITCH.

Don't you women know your place? Our brave SCLM asserts.

Women can only be prominant if they are vacuous talking heads; your Judy Woodruffs, your Paula Zahns, your Laurie Dhues.

And it is not just the SCLM, the reason they push it is because too many Americans have residual resentment over the same issue. Women are allowed to be strong-willed and independent ONLY within the confines of the family residence -- and even then, ultimately she must back down to the "profound" wisdom of we men (and look at us, are we not demonstrably wise?)

On gender issues, we are a profoundly fucked up country on this issue and the media doesn't help.

Yes, the "Big Dog" was Great

Wonderful speech.

But I have to tell you that the speech that created real buzz here in Reno, was the address by Bob Teetleborough at the National Property Manager's Convention, "Using Exterminators for the purposes of Homeland Security and Obtaining Pornography". It was a very good speech, lots of good ideas. I'm sure that Tom DeLay knows all about it.

Iraq in Trouble; Economy Slumping Again; Virtually Every Policy a Failure; Democrats United; Convention Starts -- SAY, How 'bout that Hacking Murder?

Our brave SCLM, our nation's future and world events are soooooo boring, playing up the tragedy of the murder of a pregnant white woman -- NOW THAT'S NEWS.

Huzzah...we've got pablum for the masses...dead...white...and pregnant...YEE HAW!!!

Once again, the First Amendment and Corporate, Consolidated media are a dangerous and destructive brew.

Oh, and Iraq. How's that going?

A new wave of kidnappings has sent shockwaves through the diplomatic community in Baghdad, virtually shutting down most embassies and thwarting Prime Minister Ayad Allawi's efforts to drum up international support for his fledgling government...

Ah, never mind. That poor WHITE WOMAN WAS PREGNANT!

Remember We're Free

Sully the sullied is beggin' for dough. Poor, poor Sully, apparently that Moon Money just doesn't have the power it used to now that people are actually paying attention to who owns the Washington Times. That and the fact that, as a gay man, the good Reverend Nutjob would like to have people of his lifestyle catapaulted into the Sun.

Attaturk, on behalf of himself and DeDurkheim, would like to remind you that we provide you "on the spot" coverage like the National Property Managers Convention 2004, and "look George Bush took another dopey picture for us to caption". And we do this without ANY cost to you, other than an unremovable stain on your soul.

With that in mind, we'd like to remind you to give absolutely NOTHING to us in terms of capital or favors of any kind. All we ask for is the occasional intellectual dry hump known as "adding us to your BLOGROLL".

Thank you, and in the words of alternative universe, agnostic Lee Greenwood:

"If there is a Supreme Being, may he or she give an attaboy to the United States."

The Upbeat Convention

So the word on the street, um ok... the word from the NYT, WAPO, and NPR, is that the dems convention will be positive and upbeat. That the party of the Donkey (who picks these animal monikers anyway?) will present itself as an enlightened, optimistic, and encouraging polical party.

In an attempt to contrast itself and its presumptive presidential candidate as possessing an optimisitic message for America. (I was sick of the way the news media for the past several months used that lanaguage and danced around calling John Kerry the dem nominee for president-- but who the hell are we kidding? The guy had it in the bag many moons ago)

I am not sure what I think of this approach. First, Chimpy McFlightsuit who will do anything to win (don't believe me, check out his first "election") and say anything negative to dismantle his competition. See the worthless attacks on Kerry for:

1. having an opinion and is willing to compromise for the sake of making sound policy(become flip floppin')
2. talks about policy with others
(intellectual egghead -- um, whatever that means)
3. came from money and is out of touch
(I mean, really... does Bush really want to go there...his own background or remember when dad Bush was amazed at that fancy star trek scanner thing...)
4. purple heart questions
(again, do you really want to go there? Considering chimpy skipped out on national guard service and that whole lies about WMD thing)
5. he would do harm to the military
(on what basis do we make that attack? see #4)

I know I am forgetting a few baseless attacks but you get the idea, they are all negative. It seems to me that one of the most damaging aspects for Bush is that the economy has gone down hill, 9-11, more underemployed people, and pointless war all occured under his from-the-ranch-vacationing "supervision."

Second, what interests me here is whether an optimisitic, sunny side of the street perspective can win the electoral college vote against a negative-the-other-guy-sucks perspective? Shouldn't the dems lay out all the problems that chimpy and trusty (not to mention Rummy, Wolfy, Condi, and other Bush prayer meeting regulars have created) have caused this country? Shouldn't they hammer home how reckless, dangerous, and destructive the Bush people have been these past four years.

Think of it, the Bushies have only had four years and look how drastically the manly man of virtue has screwed things up. Shouldn't the convention make all these problems clear as day for American voters?