Tuesday, February 28, 2006


Moron Junction rarely disappoints:

I WAS WRONG [Jonah Goldberg]

I should at least admit that my prediction that Cheney would ultimately receive a bump in the polls from the hunting accident mania hasn't panned out.

Still, he remains my favorite politician in the GOP leadership.
Posted at 12:31 PM

Jonah always admires daddy-figures that can play soldier without being a soldier.

This somehow just feels right...


Attention Conspiracists

Here's some fodder:

President Bush said his 2004 re-election victory over Sen. John Kerry was inadvertently aided by Osama bin Laden, The Washington Examiner newspaper reported Tuesday...

"What does it mean? Is it going to help? Is it going to hurt?" Bush told Sammon of the bin Laden tapes. "Anything that drops in at the end of a campaign that is not already decided creates all kinds of anxieties, because you're not sure of the effect.

"I thought it was going to help," Bush said. "I thought it would help remind people that if bin Laden doesn't want Bush to be the president, something must be right with Bush."

Of course, unasked by this news report is the flip-side of the question.

One could ask, whether Osama knows what's good for his business too -- and Bush is fucking fantastic for Al Qaeda. Plus the two families do go way back.

Bin Laden is more than happy to have you as President you incompetent boob.


Scooter, Scooter, Scooter, why art thou such a bag o' douchiness?

WASHINGTON - Handwritten notes taken by the CIA show Vice President Cheney's top aide knew the name of CIA spy Valerie Plame a month before her cover was blown.

It appears to be the first known document in the hands of prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald that directly contradicts Lewis (Scooter) Libby's claim he learned from reporters in July 2003 that Valerie Plame was a CIA employee...

..."A CIA employee assigned to provide daily intelligence briefs to the Vice President and Libby has handwritten notes indicating that Libby referred to 'Joe Wilson' and 'Valerie Wilson' by those names in conversation with the briefer on June 14, 2003," Fitzgerald wrote in a recently unsealed brief.

The filing suggests Cheney may have been present when Libby griped to his CIA briefer about agency officials slamming the veep in the press.

Seven officials have testified that Libby raised the CIA spy with them before columnist Robert Novak outed her. In the filing, Fitzgerald also revealed that his investigators also confiscated computers.

Scout Prime from New Orleans

A truly memorable Fat Tuesday.


Richard Cohen:

Whatever their concerns may be, whatever their fears, they would not have had them, expressed them or seen them in print had the middle name of the United Arab Emirates been something else.

In summary, all you opponents are bigots and Dubai Ports World, a pillar of integrity.

Except, well, not so much

The parent company of a Dubai-based firm at the center of a political storm in the US over the purchase of American ports participates in the Arab boycott against Israel...

For more go here.

When does Wanker Cohen stop sucking at Bush's teat?

Here's the real question.

How long before DPW decides to pull a Harriet Meiers and withdraw its offer in order to save everyone some face?

...and it will be seen as a victory for Bush somehow.


As we approach the 3rd anniversary of the War; and soon the 3rd Anniversary of the declaration by the Codpieced Jesus of "Mission Accomplished" let us look, beyond the mass killings of the previous four days to the day-to-day life that is Baghdad:

BAGHDAD (Reuters) - Look in the pockets of Iraqis whose jobs take them around Baghdad every day and you are likely to find a clutch of passes and identity cards, one for every police, military or militia checkpoint they may run into.

"This one is says I'm Badr, this one I show to police, and I have the American press pass and my ordinary ID. I applied for a Mehdi Army pass on Friday but it hasn't arrived yet," said one Iraqi driver working for a foreign media organisation.

"I am Sunni so these passes mean I don't get in trouble with anyone while I'm out and about."

The sheer proliferation of armed groups -- some official, some unofficial and some that operate in the murky middle ground -- underscores the lawlessness of Iraq, where neither U.S. forces who invaded in 2003 nor the Iraqi armed forces they trained have been able to impose their authority on the whole country.

Add to that the militias, most drawn up on ethnic or religious lines, and the mix is potentially explosive as the sectarian violence that brought Iraq to the brink of civil war last week showed all too clearly.

The time for miracles for Iraq sure seem to have passed.

And it's all on Bush.

You kids just continue gettin' shot at

The National Review Editorial Board's opinion (stop snickering at the thought of National Review having an editorial board, this is a serious post!):

Throughout the Iraq war, NR has tried to temper the rival fatalisms of the Iraq optimists and pessimists. Victory in Iraq has never been inevitable or impossible. The outcome depends, as is always the case, on the choices made by the players, including ourselves. Even if our influence in Iraq is waning, our commitment — and the specific forms it takes — still matters very much. Defeatism will be self-fulfilling.

Alright, snicker a little.

If we don't clap louder what will our troops, who must be almost unanimous in supporting their mission think?

Oops, that ship has apparently sailed:

A new poll, cited by Nick Kristof and to be released today shows that U.S. soldiers overwhelmingly want out of Iraq -- and soon.

The poll is the first of U.S. troops currently serving in Iraq, according to John Zogby, the pollster. Conducted by Zogby International and LeMoyne College, it asked 944 service members, "How long should U.S. troops stay in Iraq?"

Only 23 percent backed Mr. Bush's position that they should stay as long as necessary. In contrast, 72 percent said that U.S. troops should be pulled out within one year. Of those, 29 percent said they should withdraw "immediately."

Maybe it's time for Jonah, Rich, Byron, and hell let's throw in Peter Beinart to get over there pronto and get in the front lines so they can show those American Troops Hatin' American Troops what patriotism is all about!

Before the invasion of Iraq

I asked one question repeatedly of some of the more conservative individuals at a message board I used to frequent until it became too wanky to continue and I started this blog where I could have the suckitude all to myself. There's little point in hanging out and talking politics when 6 of 10 posters are spewing Limbaugh talking points, and the occasional literate conservative is citing "The Corner".

But that's neither here nor there.

The question I asked was before March 2003 was; "What if the invasion of Iraq leads to civil war?". After all, it has been pretty consistent in history that when a dictator is overthrown, without sufficient power to occupy the vacuum, a complete breakdown in societal structure inevitably results. It didn't happen in Germany or Japan in World War II, but one need only look at the extent of their defeat and the strength of the occupation to observe how such a situation was avoided.

But otherwise, civil war is quite possible. You also had history in Iraq to go by. Though it seems to some a billion years ago, the British were not exactly able to avoid civil war in Iraq in the 1920s.

Well the response was generally this:

(1) Well sure, but that won't happen.


(2) Iraq is a secular society, they're too well-educated to go down that path.

Or, Finally the most common response:

(3) Shut up you wuss, you America-hater, U.S.A.!! U.S.A.!! I love me some stuff blowed up real good!

What's amazing is that I doubt any of those people have actually changed their minds enough to concede that maybe, just maybe, the critics were right.

The lesson? In regard to that last type of answer, a gigantic and disproportionate chunk of that 34% are on message boards. And they can stay there. Do not go out, do not vote, and for the love of all that is holy, do not breed.

I hope this doesn't hurt Richard Cohen's tender sensibilities

But if he wants to find real discrimination he need look no further than how the Bush Administration administered its lovely little occupation. From the Special Inspector General's office:

"Pre-war reconstruction planning assumed that Iraq's bureaucracy would go back to work when the fighting stopped," it said. "When it became clear that the Iraqi bureaucracy was in widespread disarray," occupation authorities "had to find coalition personnel to perform these tasks."

"The U.S. government workforce planning for Iraq's reconstruction suffered from a poorly structured, ad-hoc personnel management processes," the report said, calling hiring practices "haphazard."

At one point, officials asked civilian and military agencies for personnel "but did not prepare detailed job descriptions because of time constraints," the report said.

In late summer 2003, a new recruiting team was set up in the
Pentagon's White House Liaison Office, based in part on the "transition team" model used to staff new presidential administrations. The team quickly hired hundreds of new temporary employees, "but some possessed what proved to be inconsistent skill sets," the report said.

Perhaps if they didn't hire people from AEI or the Heritage Foundation. You know like Michael Ledeen's daughter Simone?

To Thrill a Tweety Bird

Tweety, taught he taw a putty cat again:

[Bush]looks like he's a wise man now and a man of restraint, almost Atticus Finch. You know, almost the guy against the mob outside this -- the police station.

Only in Tweety's world does his manlove for Bush convert Boo Radley into Atticus Finch.

I have a feeling Mr. Finch would never have been in this situation:

Not to mention such a scenario would make Jenna, Scout. A thought really too chilling to dwell upon.


Atrios gets all Chomsky on us:

The simplest and most obvious lesson I've learned in the past few years is that the American press has an incredible bias in favor of whatever our foreign policy happens to be that day. Whoever the government deems as "friends" are the good guys and whoever they deem as "enemies" are the bad guys. The form of government, freedoms, human rights abuses, suffrage, etc... are entirely irrelevant.

That is absolutely correct. I have my issues with Chomsky, particularly when it comes to some of his positions on Cambodia. But those are particulars within a generally sound thesis. Over the last couple years I've come to realize that the Bush Administration and the American media have actually come to prove most all of Chomsky's theories of media manipulation (something I always agreed was there, but disputed the degree -- well, no more). The build up to the War in Iraq was the perfect example of this phenomena.

Amazing isn't it that one of the most important intellectuals (agree with him or not) of the last half-century is rarely on television -- yet Byron York and Kate O'Beirne are never lacking for a chair with Temmeh, and the Doughy Pantload spins nepotism to the point he gets on the editorial page of the LA Times?

Vast Wastelands aren't just for television any more.

I can tell you from personal experience

When you are trying to parse a poll by looking at the weighting of respondents you are playing a suckers game.

Polling for Job Approval by "Americans" is apparently cause for consternation of methods by Madame Beepery.

No matter how you slice it, 34% is teh suck.

More lying

Iraq, the fuck up!

Now with three times more carnage:

Grisly attacks and other sectarian violence unleashed by last week's bombing of a Shiite Muslim shrine have killed more than 1,300 Iraqis, making the past few days the deadliest of the war outside of major U.S. offensives, according to Baghdad's main morgue. The toll was more than three times higher than the figure previously reported by the U.S. military and the news media.

Hundreds of unclaimed dead lay at the morgue at midday Monday -- blood-caked men who had been shot, knifed, garroted or apparently suffocated by the plastic bags still over their heads. Many of the bodies were sprawled with their hands still bound -- and many of them had wound up at the morgue after what their families said was their abduction by the Mahdi Army, the Shiite militia of cleric Moqtada al-Sadr...

...The disclosure of the death tolls followed accusations by the U.S. military and later Iraqi officials that the news media had exaggerated the violence between Shiites and Sunnis over the past few days.

Meanwhile, not much mention of this at "Moron Junction" or the "The Cryptic Musings of Ernest T. Bass, ESQ." At the former, I kid you not, they are going on and on about whether Andrew Sullivan and Masturbation.

Monday, February 27, 2006

Reap What You Sow

Not that I think it is a good idea to have a company owned by the UAE government controlling six major ports in this country, nor that it is prima facie a bad idea.

What I do know is that the xenophobia pushed by the administration in pursuit of the GWOT is *the* reason for this, no matter whether the Democrats are capitalizing on the political problem growing out of the deal.

Bush made his bed now he has to sleep in it. Pathetic.


The point is that it doesn't even matter whether it is in reality a bad idea. It is a bad idea in concept on purely political grounds. The fact that they couldn't get it right says a lot.

Bush Bringing Democracy To India

What are the chances Bush talks about bringing democracy to the great nation of India? I'd say pretty good if he ever goes off-script.


Marc Maron's coming back:

Cardinal Milfington, Lawton Smalls, and perhaps, just perhaps...

"I'm sacred life...I did your wife"

Maybe she should have stuck with Maglalangadingdong

I'm at least as shallow as TBogg.

Ms. Kitchen Slut.

I should add, Francis Bacon defined "Coulter" as "crusty skank".

Britney Spears could use some grooming tips from Karen Hughes

Run Aragon Run!

Those are some off-putting arms ya' got there.

(AP Photo/Rob Griffith)

Could someone return Andrew Young's soul please?

First, he's seen defending Bush when the latter left his bubble and received some criticism at the King funeral.

Now he's doing this:

Former United Nations ambassador and Atlanta mayor Andrew Young will be the public spokesman for a group organized with backing from Wal-Mart Stores Inc. that defends the world's largest retailer against mounting attacks from its critics.

Working Families for Wal-Mart, a group of community leaders from across the country, was set to announce Monday that Young will be the chairman of its 16 member steering committee formed in December to counter charges from two union-backed groups that are pressuring Wal-Mart to improve wages and benefits.

Young said he will be a public face for the group, giving interviews and publishing opinion articles defending the company. "They are some of the best entry level jobs that are available to poor people. And they also make products available to the working poor," Young said in a phone interview from Atlanta.

I mean it's bad enough to see footballing lunkhead Lynn Swann Santorumized, but Andrew Young? Shit, you once stood for something. Admittedly, I never walked or did anyting with Martin Luther King, but can you possibly fathom him doing this? Fuck no, he'd be on the opposite side.


One of the worst laws ever passed

Bush on the day that he signed the Bankruptcy reform bill:

''In recent years, too many people have abused the bankruptcy laws. They've walked away from debts even when they had the ability to repay them."

Once again, the moron who's never had to worry about bankruptcy because one of daddy's friends would bail him out or set him up with a sweet deal (*cough* Texas Rangers *cough*) fucks up again.

In what will undoubtedly be the first of many ''I told you so" reports, the National Association of Consumer Bankruptcy Attorneys has found that, overwhelmingly, people who file for bankruptcy protection aren't deadbeats who went on shopping sprees with the intention of shirking their debts.

I'd like to see one of them confronted about this -- fucking Biden should have it stuck in his face anytime he hits the trail. When he comes to Iowa and New Hampshire hit the idiot up on this and let him know he's NOT getting a nomination.

That's quite contrary to what was being charged by supporters of a federal bankruptcy law that went into effect last October.

For years, those proponents argued that billions of dollars were being lost because people were simply being allowed to walk away from their debts...

...Now, in the first analysis of the tens of thousands of people who have undergone credit counseling since the law passed, the bankruptcy attorneys association found that nearly all (97 percent) of the debtors truly couldn't pay their debts...

...Four out of five filers felt forced to seek bankruptcy protection because of a job loss, catastrophic medical expenses, or the death of a spouse, according to the report, ''Bankruptcy Reform's Impact: Where Are All the Deadbeats?"

A special and dubious nod to Democrats like Joe Biden who is in the hip pocket of the credit card industry; Harry Reid and Joe Lieberman. They expended no real effort to kill this bill and rolled over. Not just for his ubiquitious self-promotion am I anti-Biden, I'm anti-Biden because this bill is as far from what the Democratic Party should stand for as any I can contemplate.

In return they gave no real benefit to the industry it turns out and managed to really harm consumers. As rapacious a bill as possible.

Frankly, I don't give a shit


But, I'm guessing this pretty much sums up the Bode Miller experience for everyone involved, including him.

Oh boy

How bad will today be? One certainly will likely not find out from the first blush of cable news:

Violence killed at least 29 people Sunday, including three American soldiers, and mortar fire rumbled through the heart of Baghdad after sundown despite stringent security measures imposed after an explosion of sectarian violence.

A ban on driving in Baghdad and its suburbs helped prevent major attacks during daylight Sunday, but after nightfall explosions thundered through the city as mortar shells slammed into a Shiite quarter in southwestern Baghdad, killing 16 people and wounding 53, police said.

Mortar fire also hit a Shiite area on the capital's east side, killing three people and injuring six, police reported.

Nevertheless, officials announced they would let vehicles back on the streets at 6 a.m. Monday — in part because shops were running out of food and other basics. Gasoline stations were closed, and people were unable to go to work Sunday, a work day in this Muslim country.

One gets the feeling if the rubicon hasn't already been crossed, one more major incident will be the tipping point.

There is no way such a situation can be explained as a sign of "progress" -- except on FoxNews.

Commonplace Torture Chairs

Without the intention of taking away what has happened at Gitmo and that pesky prison some where in the Middle East... I forget where... We must not forget what goes on in United States prisons, jails right here nationally in those torture chairs. I strongly encourage everyone to look up a recent incident in Biloxi/Gulfport Mississippi where a man arrested for disorderly conduct and public intoxication was beated and tortured in a chair used to restrain inmates considered unruly.

The inmates are strapped down with leather binds that electronically tighten as the "victim" moves to adjust or resist; in this case the man was taken to the hospital after some hours in this chair, where he later died. The FBI is investigating this and a similar case where this young man's kidneys were severely damaged to the point he required dialysis and physical therapy to repair muscle and nerve damage from sittingin the same chair for over seven hours.

There is a level of accountability that we are not holding our government officials to - if we stand united against this type of inhumane treatment in either of these cases we will gain credibility abroad - that is what little shred of credability that can be salvaged.

Following up

DeDurkheim, who like me fondly remembers the 1970s version of "Night Stalker" memorialized Darren McGavin. I should add that my mother, adores "A Christmas Story" as well (a little too much frankly, [every stinkin' year! ;-)])

I learned something on Roger Ailes about the other well-known individual who passed this weekend, Don Knotts. Any man who gave us advanced warning of the rise of George W. Bush by playing "Barney Fife" already contributed mightily to our culture. But when you add in "The Incredible Mr. Limpet" well that's so much pop culture from one man that he can be more than forgiven for being on "Three's Company". I should add also kudos to the actress, Betty Lynn, who gave us advanced notice of Laura in her portrayal of "Thelma Lou". Besides it wasn't their fault that all the African-Americans were driven out of television's version of North Carolina (foreshadowing Bush's more hands on actions toward with New Orleans).

The story of his death is also rather touching:

Former costar Andy Griffith was at Knotts's bedside when he died at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, as were his third wife, Francie, and his children, Thomas and Karen.

Dammit, that's sweet!

And this is funny.

Shallower than a dry gulch

President make no mistakes is becoming quite the global traveler in an effort to look like he knows what he is doing. Despite his best efforts the President of the United States still is able to garner some respect for the "office" if not the "office-holder". But in fairness to Bush he still has two years and nearly 11 months to get that fuck-up accomplished too.

Did you know that he's going to India?

I'm sure he'll go there all Gandhi like, no?

Sadly, knowing Bush he'll be wearing an adult diaper and tell the press he is doing a Gandhi impression. Only without the "peace-shit".

President Bush is planning a two-day wind sprint across India this week, when he will meet with political leaders, chat up high-tech millionaires and give a speech at a 16th-century fort. But to the consternation of the Indians, he will not see the country's most famous monument, the Taj Mahal, a decision that Mr. Bush said was made by an omnipotent scheduler.

But, as we've come to expect from the Chimperor Disgustus even such matters are not his fault:

"Look, if I were the scheduler, perhaps I'd be doing things differently," Mr. Bush said last week, when he was asked in an interview with Indian reporters at the White House why he was skipping the Taj. "I'll be the president, we've got the scheduler being the scheduler. I'm going to miss a lot of the really interesting parts of your great country. I know that."

Attention Calcutta, another black-hole is coming, and it is between Georgie's ears. I have no doubt that the first thing he'll order in India is a ribeye steak. Then he'll go to Pakistan and in an effort not to make that mistake again, order pork chops.

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Rest in Peace Night Stalker

It's been a difficult weekend for fans of classic televivison, stage, and movies.

Just hours after the announcement of the passing of comedy great Don Knotts, came word that another Hollywood veteran had passed away.

Darren McGavin, a man whose career spanned everything from Mike Hammer to the original “Kolchak the Night Stalker” died on Saturday of natural causes. He was just three months shy of his 84th birthday.

McGavin was an actor of incredible breadth, capable of hilarious comedic performances or tense dramatic turns.

But it was as the renegade newspaper reporter in the white suit working for the fictional I.N.S. wire service that he became best known to a generation in the 70s.

The TV show “The Night Stalker” featured McGavin as Karl Kolchak who continually faced down vampires, monsters, zombies and other bizarre creatures, although no one –including his long suffering editor - ever believed him.

The “Night Stalker” started as a series of TV movies and had a short run in 1974, but it’s fondly remembered as a cult show that would inspire a viewer named Chris Carter to create his own weird classic years later – “The X Files”.

The actor would later make a few cameos on the show.

This season's remake was quickly cancelled, although it contained one golden moment in the first episode -- McGavin’s original character digitally inserted into one shot.

McGavin was trained in New York and got his big break in the 1955 movie “The Man with the Golden Arm,” considered one of Frank Sinatra’s greatest films.

That landed the young thespian his first TV role as Mickey Spillane’s hard boiled detective Mike Hammer a year later.

A long series of movies and TV parts followed, and he won an Emmy for playing Murphy Brown's father in a 1990 episode of the Candice Bergen series.

But it’s one outstanding film role that assures McGavin will forever be remembered at least once a year.

His turn as the irritable, constantly cursing “Old Man”, Ralphie’s dad in the classic “A Christmas Story”, turned the actor into a holiday icon.

His warning that his son will “put his eye out” with his dreamed of Red Ryder BB gun is heard every year in December.

Surveys show the film has become one of the favourite Christmas movies of all time, and a U.S. cable network runs it for 24 hours straight every December 25th.

McGavin’s death was announced on his official website.

“It is with great sadness that we announce the death of Darren McGavin at approximately 7:10am Pacific time Saturday 25, 2006 …

“Darren is gone, but in many respects he will always be with us: as Carl Kolchak, fighting authority and battling monsters; the grumpy Old Man sending curses over Lake Michigan; as David Ross, the outsider, Grey Holden, captain of the Enterprise, the irascible detective Mike Hammer or any number of memorable guest star appearances.”

He leaves behind four children and a legion of fans.

Tom Friedman, man of the left

Yes, Rush Limbaugh, Tom Friedman speaks for me, Liberal J. Turk. Considering that this blogboy has himself written, about 75 anti-Friedman posts, I beg to disagree. But to make it clear, and because it is Sunday and I'm lazy, here are re-runs of a few Friedman-related posts to clarify this point:

AUGUST 4, 2005:

De NeoCon planners sing this song,

Doo-dah, doo-dah

De NeoCon war is always on,

Oh, de doo-dah day.

Gonna war all night,

Gonna war all day

Lost my money to the Thin blonde hag,

Somebody bash on "the gays".

January 6, 2005:

A Night on the Town

by Thomas L. Friedman

I was in London last week, where I learned that Tony Blair is having many of the same problems as President Bush. Only Blair's problems are worse because of a belief he is not in control of his own policy, but rather the Bush Administration is.

However, while getting a White Zinfindel (which in London, taste like Coca-Cola) at a club in Soho, I met her. At first, I assumed she was a taxi cab driver, because I meet a lot of those. But upon reflection I do not belief that she was, she may have been a chimney sweep.

I was contemplating the quality of my beverage, as well as the current political make up of the Syrian government when she walked up to me and she asked me to dance. I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said Lola.

Well, though many of you may have surmised this, I am not the New York Times Editorial page's most physical guy (that would be Kristof, ha ha just kidding!). However, I do pride myself on both my walrous-like mustache and rugged Minnesota build. But, when Lola came up to me, she squeezed me tight and I felt for a moment she nearly broke my spine.

At first, we talked about a few things; the people of Iran wanting greater democracy, and whether the current Tehran government was trying to hide a nuclear weapons program; how there is commonality between the nations of the west and the lslamic world in that we both really love fudge, though tragically we differ on the method in which it is packed...somewhat.

In speaking with Lola though I was having some trouble. Now, I'm not the New York Times Editorial page's dumbest columnist (that would be David Brooks) but I could not understand why Lola walked like she was a woman and but talked like she was a man.

Well we switched to champagne and talked about the Balfour Declaration, Mustafa Kemal, Saladin, Al Zarqawi, and bin Laden all night, under the electric candlelight. Eventually, after I made what was, as usual, a particularly trenchant point about how "liquid paper" would eventually bring both east and west together, she picked me up and sat me on her knee, and said "Tommy boy won’t you come home with me".

Well I’m not the New York Times Editorial page's most passionate guy (that would be Safire), but when I looked in her crossed-eyes, well I almost fell for Lola.

But I remembered that I am a professional editorial writer and gadfly, so I pushed her away and then I walked to the door. Unfortunately, I had had two drinks over the course of eight hours so I fell to the floor. I then was down on my knees and then I looked at her and she at me.

Well that is clearly the way that I want it to stay, and I am now writing this column so that I can state that I always want it to be that way for my Lola. Terrorists will be terrorists; neo-cons will be neo-cons; and finally girls will be boys and boys will be girls, it is clearly a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world, except for Lola.

Well I left home just a week before, and I had never so completely exhausted my ample NY Times' expense account before. But Lola smiled and took me by the hand
And said dear Tommy boy I am gonna make you a less thick-headed, pussified man.

Well, I am not the NY Times Editorial page's most masculine man (that would be Maureen Dowd) but I know what I am and I am ,in general, glad I am, approximately, a man.

And so is Lola.

April 15, 2004:

What the Arab Street Wants
By Pretend Thomas Friedman (sort of)

I recently attended a conference in Cairo for globetrotting pundits with excess travel points. On my way to the Conference at the "Abdel Nassar British Petroleum Dome" I met a cab driver named Faruk who asked me about the wests' feelings toward his culture, "Tell me gov'ner, what is it you Americans want to hear from us, pray tell?". I looked Faruk in his one good eye and told him, "We want you to be happy and stop killing us".

"But old top", Faruk continued, "we want you to stop killing us first. It seems the least you could do my good fellow. Your high-tech weapons and smart bombs are not very sporting. Bloody unfair and all that."

I took Faruk's words to heart. I cannot give out his last name for fear you might actually check my sources, but I decided to use them so as to write this column about what I think the Arab Street really wants based on what people like Faruk, and Mohammad, Mohammad, Mohammad, Larry and Mohammad, have told me during my many trips to the Middle East.

While traveling on the New York Time's dime in the region, staying at the best hotels and four-star restaurant districts, it has become clear to me what this troubled region of the world is missing and how that relates to the people's anger and violence.

Throughout Cairo, Riyadh, Amman or wherever I have looked, and I've done so thoroughly, there are no Rib Joints or Adult Bookstores to be found. I think there is no small coincidence in that. While President Bush keeps talking about Islamic Extremists being "Freedom Hating" he overlooks another distinct possibility, that they are in fact, "Porno Loving", or that rather than putting Americans on a slab, they'd like a thick hearty slab o' Ribs. With so little access to the wonders of "Jenna Jameson" or "Mesquite BBQ" no wonder there are so many "suiciders".

Unfortunately, at the moment the Bush Administration seems focused on attempting to impose a democracy in places like Iraq inorganically, from above – which readers of this column know, I have NEVER advocated. But it seems to me that the focus should be on the three "Bs" we can share with the Islamic world to improve their daily lives, Broads, Booze, and Brats. I am aware of no cultural impediments to such an initiative.

I haven't seen Faruk lately, but I do intend to bring it up to him when I see him…I mean, when I see him again.

Let's get this straight

Iraq is already in a form of civil war, no matter how many bland salads Laura Ingraham was able to get from the McDonalds in the "Green Zone". But like most civil wars, it has periods of greater intensity than others. For example,

Hundreds of Iraqis are being tortured to death or summarily executed every month in Baghdad alone by death squads working from the Ministry of the Interior, the United Nations' outgoing human rights chief in Iraq has revealed.

John Pace, who left Baghdad two weeks ago, told The Independent on Sunday that up to three-quarters of the corpses stacked in the city's mortuary show evidence of gunshot wounds to the head or injuries caused by drill-bits or burning cigarettes. Much of the killing, he said, was carried out by Shia Muslim groups under the control of the Ministry of the Interior.

It's not everyday that a major shrine gets blown up in an obvious inside-job. But the things that journalist cannot see (because they cannot risk going about and finding out because (duh!) there's a civil war going on) that are indicative of conflict occur everyday.

Let's see...

Atta J. Turk is the following:

1. Pro Voting Rights Act;
2. Pro Equal Rights Amendment;
3. Pro Expansion of Title VII to include sexual orientation as a protected class;
4. Pro Equal Pay;
5. Pro diplomatic relations with the Palestinians even if Hamas is in power;
6. Was anti-Iraq Invasion;
7. Opposed military action against Iran, Syria, or any other nation Michael Ledeen can spell;
8. Anti-employment or civil rights discrimination against individuals on the basis of religion, including, as especially in this era, Islam.

And yet, I am against allowing a government-owned business to run American ports when that government has a track record of supportin Al Qaeda, the Taliban, and being over the top anti-Israel - once might say being incredibly anti-semitic. For example, this seems rather disturbing:

Harvard Divinity School has agreed to return a $2.5 million gift from the president of the United Arab Emirates after 18 months of controversy over the donor's alleged connection to anti-Semitic and anti-American propaganda, Harvard officials said yesterday.

While not unprecedented, the university's return of a major donation is rare. It followed a campaign by some students and faculty members to protest the inflammatory activities of a think tank named for the UAE's unelected leader, Sheik Zayed bin Sultan Nahayan. . . .

Seven of the divinity school's 39 faculty members and hundreds of students and alumni had signed petitions urging Harvard to reject the gift. The petitions cited the activities of the Abu Dhabi-based Zayed International Center for Coordination and Follow-Up, which sponsored lectures and publications claiming that Zionists -- rather than Nazis -- were responsible for the Holocaust and that the U.S. military staged the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks.

Golly, I might as well buy me a sheet because by the assertions of Friedman, Ignatius, and Kristof I'm racist.

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Being Charitable

The incomparable Wolcott tries his best when commenting on this powerful critique, to cast the Chimperor Disgustus in the best possible light. But still, the disaster of George W. Bush shines through all too clearly:

Poor President Bush, prince of fools. He let the neoconservative creative destructors play upon his religiosity (and Cheney's power hunger) and persuade him that the overthrow of Saddam Hussein would be a transformative moment that would set democracy and freedom in motion across the region, and crown him in history with Churchillian honor. I believe Bush wanted democracy in Iraq, or convinced himself that he believed it after the Chalabi-as-chess-king scheme fell through, because such belief flatters his pride in his own idealism. But the intellectual architects of the policy didn't care. If there was peace and stability in the new Iraq that would strength America's power in the region and bolster Israeli security, fine; if Iraq fissured into factional strife, fire, and chaos, better still.

Even sarcastically I am not willing to be that generous.


Any state which has repeatedly elected Bill "OWI" Janklow to positions of power is an example of morality you want to follow [/sarcasm]:


About six months ago it was admitted that there was but ONE IRAQI batallion capable of fighting on its own without the United States help. But Rummy et al said "hey they are really progressing in their training".

Then a few weeks ago we heard that after all these months of training it was again admitted that there was still but ONE IRAQI batallion capable of fighting on its own without the United States help.


And the news gets even BETTER a few weeks later when you find out a few weeks later that there are NO IRAQI batallions capable of fighting on their own without the United States help.

Altogether now....


I mean Jesus Mohammad and Abraham; Larry Moe and Curly!!!, how the fuck does anyone in this Administration have a job? How were they ever employed? How the hell are they able to bamboozle anyone?

Steve Gilliard is probably right, the one unit that had previously been trained was the one exposed as engaging in "death squad activity", let's call them 'the 101st Negropontes'.

BushCo does not have the competence to clip their own toenails, let alone engage in policy decisions.

It's bad enough that they lied to us about the war -- that's a fucking war crime. But they cannot plan a war for shit.

Gandhi was a better military strategist than these dumbasses. Fuck, GUMBY, could do better.


I certainly have developed one for Keith Olbermann who took apart Falafel Bill last night.

But I have to make room for George Clooney too:

Clooney, who has weathered attacks since opposing the 2003 Iraq invasion, said at one point that it was "frustrating" to be listed as a "traitor" on a set of playing cards, but he also accepted people's right to free speech.

He later admitted he relished the attacks.

"I think it's important to be on the right side of history," Clooney said.

"I want to be on that deck of cards. And I want to be able to say that they boycotted my films... I want to be able to say I was on the cover of a magazine called a 'traitor,'" he said.

"I'm proud of those because those were badges of honor for me because that was when you did it when it was hard to do," the actor and director said.

"You know I'm really getting fucking sick..."

"Of being the symbol representing these assholes."

REUTERS/Victor Fraile

Birdshot in his foot

Okay, we know this is true:

The defense was told that the White House had recently located and turned over about 250 pages of e-mails from the vice president's office. Fitzgerald, in a letter last month to the defense, had cautioned Libby's lawyers that some e-mails might be missing because the White House's archiving system had failed.

And now, please let this be true:

The emails are said to be explosive, and may prove that Cheney played an active role in the effort to discredit Plame Wilson's husband, former Ambassador Joseph Wilson, a vocal critic of the Bush administration's prewar Iraq intelligence, sources close to the investigation said.

Sources close to the probe said the White House "discovered" the emails two weeks ago and turned them over to Fitzgerald last week. The sources added that the emails could prove that Cheney lied to FBI investigators when he was interviewed about the leak in early 2004. Cheney said that he was unaware of any effort to discredit Wilson or unmask his wife's undercover status to reporters.

South Dakota

I'm waiting for this chump to live up to his principles and make his own sacrifice.

For him that would be outlawing masturbation in the State of South Dakota. Let's see how he feels about not having sexual intercourse with the one he loves. Because, to the extent he's ever had sex with a woman, it could not have been out of love and respect for her as an individual.

Meanwhile, being familiar with both North and South Dakota I can tell you that two more barren states do not exist. I'm not sure, in fact, whether North Dakota if it had to apply for Statehood now has the necessary population. That's how fast people flee.

But in the, which state is worse category? South Dakota just took the crown. "Fuck you Pierre", "Up Yours Sioux Falls!".

Photo from TBogg.

Morrissey, yes, Morrissey, questioned by the FBI

Joining Cat Stevens as our greatest terrorist threats.

Singer MORRISSEY was quizzed by the FBI and British intelligence after speaking out against the American and British governments.

The Brit is a famous critic of the US-led war in Iraq and has dubbed President GEORGE W BUSH a "terrorist" - but he was baffled to be hauled in by authorities.

Morrissey explains, "The FBI and the Special Branch have investigated me and I've been interviewed and taped and so forth.

I've come across a photograph of that questioning session.

Any excuse to use a Mystery Science Theatre skit y'know.

Friday, February 24, 2006

The bitter taste of defeat

What will Jonah, K-Lo, JPod and CliffORD May do?

Bill Buckley admits, at long last what we all warned them about -- only to be mocked and scorned.

We've fucked up Iraq but good, this was a monstrously bad idea to invade:

One can't doubt that the American objective in Iraq has failed. The same edition of the paper quotes a fellow of the American Enterprise Institute. Mr. Reuel Marc Gerecht backed the American intervention. He now speaks of the bombing of the especially sacred Shiite mosque in Samara and what that has precipitated in the way of revenge. He concludes that “The bombing has completely demolished” what was being attempted — to bring Sunnis into the defense and interior ministries.

Our mission has failed because Iraqi animosities have proved uncontainable by an invading army of 130,000 Americans. The great human reserves that call for civil life haven't proved strong enough. No doubt they are latently there, but they have not been able to contend against the ice men who move about in the shadows with bombs and grenades and pistols.

The Iraqis we hear about are first indignant, and then infuriated, that Americans aren't on the scene to protect them and to punish the aggressors. And so they join the clothing merchant who says that everything is the fault of the Americans.

But there is a more important point that Buckley cannot bring himself to say.




You can say we lost in Vietnam, but we just got involved, we didn't start the war.

Only James K. Polk and George W. Bush can claim to have started a war with another nation while they were President.

Polk won his war.

Bush lost his.

James Buchanan meet George W. Bush. Jim you are no longer the gold standard for Presidential incompetence.

By Popular Demand...Our Question of the Week

From Atrios: what he calls the "Moustache of Understanding", a column that can only make one say whaaa the fuck?

As a country, we must not go down this road of global ethnic profiling — looking for Arabs under our beds the way we once looked for commies. If we do — if America, the world's beacon of pluralism and tolerance, goes down that road — we will take the rest of the world with us. We will sow the wind and we will reap the whirlwind.


What ranks much higher for me is the terrible trend emerging in the world today: Sunnis attacking Shiite mosques in Iraq, and vice versa. Danish caricatures of the Prophet Muhammad, and violent Muslim protests, including Muslims killing Christians in Nigeria and then Christians killing Muslims. And today's Washington Post story about how some overzealous, security-obsessed U.S. consul in India has created a huge diplomatic flap — on the eve of Mr. Bush's first visit to India — by denying one of India's most respected scientists a visa to America on the grounds that his knowledge of chemistry might be a threat. The U.S. embassy in New Delhi has apologized.

Our Question: What part of pluralism and tolerance have I missed the last six years?

And please let me give a hearty shout out to Friedman and the assholes he has apologized for during the entirety of the mess that is the Bush maladministration:


Oh Falafel! -- Worst Person in the World!

Let nothing ever prick the sensitive, and massive, ego of Bill O'Reilly!

O'Reilly is literally trying to get Keith Olbermann fired:

February 22, 2006

Chairman Robert Wright
National Broadcasting Company
30 Rockefeller Plaza
New York, New York 10112

Dear Chairman Wright:

We, the undersigned, are becoming increasingly concerned about the well-being of MSNBC and, in particular, note the continuing ratings failure of the program currently airing weeknights on that network at 8:00 PM EST.

It is now apparent to everyone that a grave injustice has been done to the previous host for that time slot, Phil Donahue, whose ratings, at the time of his show's cancellation three years ago, were demonstrably stronger than those of the current host.

Therefore, in an effort to rescue MSNBC from the ratings basement and to restore the honor and dignity of Mr. Donahue, who was ignobly removed as host three years ago, we ask that you immediately bring Phil Donahue's show back at 8:00 PM EST before any more damage is done.

If you would like to express your support for this issue please fill in the information below and press the "Sign the Petition" button. Your signature will be added from the information you provide below. To protect your privacy, your last name will not be displayed on the web site.

If you didn't love Olbermann before, there's your reason.

And here's a special "fuck you" O'Reilly bonus!

The Dude-o-meter

Well, apparently Rush Limbaugh and Daryn Kagan are history. Though I don't know the cause (*cough* he's fucking Rush Limbaugh) any more than I know how it all started (*cough* rhymes with "bitch"), Rush is back on the market again.

Meanwhile, for the former Jeff Christie, old habits die hard:

OK, so there's that. Lemme put that aside. Next little story, and this -- this actually is from Sunday. It's an Associated Press story: "Ginsburg bears burden without O'Connor. It'll be a one-woman show in the Supreme Court starting Tuesday. Ruth Bader Ginsburg is the only female among the nine justices, and she's not so happy about it." So, resign. If you don't like it, resign. If you don't like being the only woman on the court, then go somewhere else. Besides, David Souter's a girl. Everybody knows that. What's the big deal?

To assist Rush and others determine who is or is not a woman we present the following, the "Dude-o-meter":

But perhaps it's time for Rush to settle down with a woman that already loves him and is about on his level.

But who?

Like you didn't see that one coming.

Where Is the 25 year-old, Snot-Nosed Repugnicrat?

This from dailykos on bird flu:

Meanwhile, H5N1 is becoming endemic in Europe. This means that the poultry may be exposed again and again to the virus, as has already happened in Hong Kong. The longer term approach may be a better vaccine for poultry and humans; short term, culling and other methods must be used. But senior flu researcher Robert Webster in this paper warns against killing migratory birds:

Although culling domestic poultry to contain the spread of highly pathogenic H5N1 virus is considered an acceptable agricultural practice, culling migratory birds is not acceptable to any international authority (Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations [FAO], the World Organization for Animal Health [OIE], the World Health Organization [WHO]). The idea of culling migratory birds must be strongly discouraged, for it could have unknown ecologic consequences.

Instead, since highly pathogenic H5N1 has been demonstrated in migratory birds, the poultry industries of the world must adapt measures such as increased biosecurity (Figure 1), the use of vaccines, or both.

There has to be some snappy young underqualified Bush appointee somewhere willing to push "we've got it under control" propoganda on an unsuspecting press and people.

Wonder who wrote this press release

The Washington Post writes today of the unseemly nature of a current Senator's husband lobbying on behalf of the UAE state-controlled company seeking to manage a half-dozen American ports while she is involved in the oversight of the deal.

In response, I'm guessing Elizabeth Dole's husband put out a press release in her name, given its language:

"Elizabeth Dole knows that her work is separate from Bob Dole. Bob Dole works for a law firm. Elizabeth Dole works for the people of North Carolina."

Silly Bloggers

Doing research and stuff, unlike the American Press Corps. Better send this Outraged Moderates person to one of Atrios's Blogger Ethics conferences.

Hours after a commercial plane struck the Pentagon on September 11 2001 the US defence secretary, Donald Rumsfeld, was issuing rapid orders to his aides to look for evidence of Iraqi involvement, according to notes taken by one of them.

"Hard to get good case. Need to move swiftly," the notes say. "Near term target needs - go massive - sweep it all up, things related and not."

The handwritten notes, with some parts blanked out, were declassified this month in response to a request by a law student and blogger, Thad Anderson, under the US Freedom of Information Act. Anderson has posted them on his blog at outragedmoderates.org.

We've heard before, first from Richard Clarke and then that load-Woodward, that Rummy (and Bush) were gung ho for launching Operation Clusterfuck right after 9/11 rather waiting and rampting up as a scary tool before the November 2002 elections. And here's your smoking gun (click to enlarge):

Jurassic Beaver!

More than just a hideous porn video title.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Blowed 'em Up Real Good

In news that Big Jim McBob and Billy Sol Hurok would love, the powder keg isn't being lit just with a match but a huge torch.

A faltering political process seemed on the verge of collapse as the biggest Sunni Muslim bloc pulled out of delicate talks over the shape of Iraq's new government. Sunni politicians and clerics blamed the bloodshed on their Shiite counterparts, pushing sectarian tensions to new heights as the threat of civil war shadowed the country.
"The Americans also abandoned us extremely. They could have put some of their vehicles to protect the mosques; they have the forces to do that," said Khalaf al-Hayan, general secretary of the Sunni Iraqi National Dialogue Council. "How does a civil war start? It starts like this."

And the chimp picks some bugs out of his wife's fur, studies it like the booger he was oh so proud to extract from his nose just moments ago (and wiped it on his chief of staff's back, laughing) ingests the bug, is handed a script to speak, forcefully, and belches a few words:

President Bush, who said the U.S. would help rebuild the Golden Mosque, today denounced the attacks on religious symbols and the ensuing violence.

"The voices of reason...understand that this bombing is intended to create civil strife, that the act was a evil act," Bush said. "The destruction of a holy site is a political act intending to create strife. And so I'm pleased with the voices of reason that have spoken out. And we will continue to work with those voices of reason to enable Iraq to continue on the path of a democracy that unites people and doesn't divide them."

I think he is on to something. If the voices of reason could just be heard over the blood curdling din of the heathens, things would just be fine. If they would only see we invaded their country for their own good, things would be just fine. If they would know that the people we have detained, tortured, and killed were not treated that way in vain, things would just be fine. Because the chimp knows in all of their hearts there is a yearning to be just like us: greedy, warmongering, sadists who need oil to grease the machinery of death.

"Hi, I'm George W. Bush, and do you want money from the Government?"

Take it from me, George W. Bush, no one ever worked less to get ahead than I did. And I have tips for you as to how to get more money out of government programs than ever before!

First, are you a Republican of limited qualification, but still required a high-paying six-figured salary for which you possess no skills whatsoever? Well, look no further than old George here. Write to Me, George W. Bush, the "W" stands for "money" and I'll give it to YOU! Yes YOU!

You can get big money from the government for simply sweating!

If you're a Republican, why you can even fail in one project and we'll even put you in charge of a bank!

Or an international institution!

Or even a WAR!

Need a little cash so you can get out of trouble? Then look no further than my government!

Enrich your friends!

Enrich the rich!

Send your request, and a copy of your voter registration to: "George W. Bush, 1600 Pennsylvania, Avenue, Washington, D.C."

And it's as simple as JUST BEING A REPUBLICAN!


Remember the Bush Administration touting the "progress" they were making in training police & security forces; contrasted with other stories about how insurgents were infiltrating the same forces.

As usual, it sure looks like the Bush Administration was effectively lying again. I know the real gasping will occur when they tell the truth.

Police said two bombs that had been planted at the mosque overnight exploded at dawn. Some local officials in Samarra said the bombers were dressed in the uniforms of Iraqi security forces. Prime Minister Ibrahim al-Jafari, in one of several televised news conferences and appeals by Iraqi and U.S. leaders, said preliminary investigation into the bombing pointed to "infiltration'' of Iraqi security forces.

For those of you with strong stomachs and whose remotes broke after Olberman's show finished for the day, you may have seen dye-job propogandist Laura Ingraham on Scarborough Country. I can only imagine the laughable lying that must have been taking place on her part after a week in the "Green Zone". I can only imagine because the hell if I'd watch that shit.

"I wonder if 'Steve Howe' is here?"

(muttering to self) "It was the heat of the moment, heat of the moment, heat of the moment..."

I always figured him to be a lame prog rock guy. Bush undoubtedly did several lines of coke off their album covers.

President Bush, ladies and gentlemen

Smart enough to detect obvious rope traps.

(AP Photo/Pablo Martinez Monsivais)

A few seconds later, guess who shows up...

I would like to point out to my friends in the Secret Service that this is PARODY and I am not encouraging Bush & Cheney go hunting together.

Who'd have thought that with rifles in their hands, its Cheney that's Gilligan and Bush that's the Skipper?

Prevented from bringing his gun

Dick sneaks in a smirk as he manufactures his own personal musk, good thing he wore the black pants.

(AP Photo/Gerald Herbert)

Last Throes

Dick Cheney, about as accurate a soothe-sayer as your average National Enquirer Psychic (who I noticed failed to predict this year that Dick Cheney would get sauced and shoot an old man in the face).

Insurgents posing as police destroyed the golden dome of one of
Iraq's holiest Shiite shrines Wednesday, setting off an unprecedented spasm of sectarian violence. Angry crowds thronged the streets, militiamen attacked Sunni mosques, and at least 19 people were killed...

...In predominantly Shiite Basra, police said militiamen broke into a prison, hauled out 12 inmates, including two Egyptians, two Tunisians, a Libyan, a Saudi and a Turk, and shot them dead in reprisal for the shrine attack.

The bodies of three Iraqi journalists, including a well-known correspondent for Al Arabiya television, were found Thursday near Samarra, police and the Arabic network said. Al Arabiya's Atwar Bahjat and two colleagues from the al-Wassan media company had been in the city to cover the bombing when they disappeared Wednesday night, the network said.

In Baghdad, the bodies of 23 men were found bound and shot, police said Thursday. It was not immediately clear whether the killings were linked to the shrine attack.

I'm going to guess that more than a few of them were.

Everyday you wake up and wonder what nightmare from Iraq the press filter will allow you to discover today?

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Just when you thought he could not be any sadder

Froomkin reports that Bob Woodward is still saying that Cheney may run for President in 2008.

On the lecture circuit, author and Washington Post Associate Editor Bob Woodward continues to push the idea that Dick Cheney may run for president in 2008.

Tracy Idell Hamilton writes in the San Antonio Express-News that Woodward "noted that Republicans have a long track record of nominating 'old war horses.'

"Given that, and depending on how things in Iraq proceed, 'You're going to think I'm crazy, but you heard it here first. I think they could nominate Dick Cheney.' "

Not just a wanker, but one hell of a dumbfuck as well.

What would Cheney's slogan be Bob?

"Cheney 2008: NOT IN THE FACE!"

"Cheney 2008: Shoot first, Don't Answer Questions Later"

"Cheney 2008: The Republic's Last Throes"

"Cheney 2008: Go Fuck Yourself in the Face!"

Joe Klein Empathizes With Cheney

Joe Klein has a problem calling it straight: Cheney fucked up, the handling of the shooting after-the-fact was a fuck-up, both are apt metaphors for the last six years under the reign of king George. Here is some of what he had to say in a recent column:

"In less than a second, less time than it takes to tell," Dick Cheney mused last week, his quail-hunting expedition had gone "from what is a very happy, pleasant day with great friends in a beautiful part of the country, doing something I love—to, my gosh, I've shot my friend. I've never experienced anything quite like that before." It was perhaps the most eloquent, emotionally unguarded moment from the notoriously buttoned-up Vice President. He seemed stunned, uncertain for once. And the haunted look in his eyes reminded me of what soldiers in Vietnam used to call the Thousand-Yard Stare—the paralytic shock that comes from seeing the impact that even low-caliber weaponry can have on human flesh.

Yeah, poor Dick, now he knows what it must be like to be a real shoot 'em up soldier. Right.

The Vice President's hunting accident occasioned a familiar explosion of public inanity. We seem to have a primal need for these circuses; they are the postmodern equivalent of scapegoat sacrifice. There was the embarrassing, self-righteous reportorial melee in the White House pressroom. There was the predictable patter of late-night comedians, although the jokes didn't seem quite so funny this time; a man had been shot.

Public inanity. Self-righteous reportorial melee. My how above all of us, including the White House press corps, you are Mr. Klein.

But Cheney's stubborn diffidence may have been something else entirely: a consequence of the incoherence and confusion that come with emotional trauma, as well as an understandable desire to protect oneself and one's friends from the ravening horde at a moment of personal anguish.

The possibility of vice-presidential anguish was barely mentioned by most commentators at first. Cheney is a tough customer; Oprahfied "sharing" isn't his way. But then, there he was, with that haunted look in his Fox News interview, saying, "[T]he image of him falling is something I'll never be able to get out of my mind. I fired, and there's Harry falling ..." Hunting had given him "great pleasure" in the past, but he wasn't so sure now. In fact, he sounded a lot like the combat veterans I've spoken with over the years, for whom the living nightmare of firing a weapon under questionable circumstances is a constant theme.

I guess you have a special window into his soul, Joe, thanks for clearing it up. And I'm sure all those combat veterans out there really appreciate that analogy.

I bet Cheney's known longer

Is this guy ever given a piece of news that may have any potential consequence? You know, like he's the President?

President Bush was unaware of the pending sale of shipping operations at six major U.S. seaports to a state-owned business in the United Arab Emirates until the deal already had been approved by his administration, the White House said Wednesday.

Just like Rummy, who is supposedly on the committee that approves such nonsense.

Chimp Watching Too Many Old Movies

The petulant puss is really, really mad, so mad in fact that he has taken to talking like they do in the old movies. From today's LA Times:

Lawmakers "ought to listen to what I have to say about this," he told reporters. "They ought to look at the facts and understand the consequences of what they're going to do. But if they pass a law, I'll deal with it, with a veto."

The rest of the quote:

Yeah, see, what are ya some kind of wise guy? Why I outta smack ya right in the kisser , see. Who do ya think I am treatin' me like some kind of sap? Well I'll show yous guys, see, I'll show ya real good like.

"Don't Shoot Dick! Don't Shoot!"

Tony Scalia's hunting stories.

(AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite)

All my Himbos

Everytime John McCain kisses right-wing ass in his quest to be President. But McCain is not exclusive with his senatorial mantasies, there are other suspects.

He came out supporting Bush's plan on handing over control of ports to the government owned corporation of the UAE yesterday as an obvious firewall for Bush.

Sen. John McCain said Tuesday night that he stands behind the Bush administration's decision to approve a deal that gives an Arab company control over operations at six major U.S. ports.

"I trust the president of the United States," McCain, R-Ariz., told nearly 800 West Valley residents during a town-hall meeting in Sun City West. "I will not make a judgment until I hear his arguments as to why he made this decision. . . . I will not reject out of hand the decision of the commander in chief."

His support came out shortly after he was doing this:

Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., a man in perpetual motion, flew to South Carolina in January. His stops included a tribute to Martin Luther King Jr. and speeches to local Republican groups. But one of his most important events was not on the public schedule -- a 5 p.m. meeting at a Spartanburg hotel with loyalists to President Bush.

A dozen or so people were in attendance. At least two were among Bush's major national fundraisers. Virtually all had been on Bush's side in the bitter 2000 South Carolina primary that badly damaged McCain's chances of winning the presidential nomination and scarred the relationship between the two men and their rival political camps. McCain was there to woo them.

There's no doubt, he's running in 2008. Therefore, it is necessary that as Bush's incompetence (at best!) is proven time and time after time that we remind people of this over and over again.

Or as I've liked to style it before...

But it is not just McCain, old reliable, Bush frenching, Joe Lieberman came -- came, like an ambitious cabana boy, to his Dear Leader's defense:

One of the few legislators to come close to defending the transaction was Senator Joseph I. Lieberman, Democrat of Connecticut, who is considered a security hawk among Democrats.