Groups Decry Bush Speech

Apparently the Bush speech was so bad that Yale University is officially requesting that Bush return his diploma and immediately return to the university for remedial course work.

"That was by far the worst political speech in decades," said Dean Webber. "It is clear that Mr. Bush's gentleman's C's were in serious error. And at Yale we take the issue of public speaking very seriously. After all, we are Yale."

"It is a significant problem when one of our graduates makes President Grant or President Ford look like incredible public speakers."

In addition, to Yale rescinding his degree, Toastmasters International have also decried the Bush speech. G. Wilson Speaksalot, the head of the American contingent of Toastmasters stated in a hastily called press conference: "There was no life to the speech. People at the convention and at home were falling asleep. To be completely honest, I do not remember anything about it except that I contemplated suicide for a little more than half an hour. It was not pretty, not good at all."

The head Toastmaster concluded with that statement that: "My seven year old waxes more eloquently."

We here at the Rising Hegemon could not agree more. And we don't even know young Mr. Speaksalot.