Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Overheard

This evening: approximately 6:30 PM on LaGuardia Place between Bleeker and West Third:
"Clean the fucking wax out of your ears, you deaf bitch!"
White guy, small-framed, thirty-five-ish, skinny jeans, dark, sport coat, sneakers, short black hair, carrying a clear shopping bag filled with what the woman who cuts my hair calls "product" screaming into a cell phone.

Banned Words of 2010™: Q3 Update

New items since last update in BOLD. We'll cull this list down to maximum ten in December. Meanwhile, add your suggestions in comments.

Because it's never too early, to put the world on notice ...
  1. Recession
  2. Sausage grinder (re the legislative process)
  3. Gunman
  4. Bonus
  5. Teachable Moment
  6. Lockdown
  7. Too big to fail
  8. Octomom
  9. Toxic assets
  10. Stress Test
  11. Obamism
  12. Color Story (I love "Project Runway", but Tim Gunn, I beg you to stop "Color Story" dead in in tracks before I sick Nina Garcia on you.)
  13. Green shoots (re the economy)
  14. Temperament
  15. The New New (or The New Normal)
  16. Twitter
  17. Bánh mì
  18. Swarovski crystals
  19. Empathy
  20. New media, including but not limited to "Social Networking"
  21. Tablescape (Cut it out, Food Network!) (h/t pal Sexy Pixie)
  22. Closely watched yardstick
  23. Compromise/Bipartisan
  24. Emboldened
  25. Cougar
  26. Serious
  27. Walk back (As in "Republican presidential hopeful Rick Santorum is walking back his comments about party boss Rush Limbaugh." (Blame Josh Marshall for this one.)
  28. Baby Bump (This one has simply got to stop.)
  29. Fascism
  30. Statement Jewelry
  31. Perfidious (This one is Steve Simels' fault.)
  32. Gang of [INSERT NUMBER OF SENATORS HERE]
  33. Socialism
  34. Digital
  35. Czar/Tsar
  36. Devastate/Devastated/Devastating (Perspective, please! Rejection from Harvard Law and being forced to "settle" for NYU is not "devastating." Missing a trip to Cancún because a tropical storm precluded your plane from taking off is disappointing, not "devastating". Not getting tickets for the Streisand Village Vanguard show is not "devastating." Devastate means " to bring to ruin or desolation by violent action" or "to reduce to chaos, disorder, or helplessness". Trust me: you are not devastated.)
  37. Post-Racial

Pricks

John Derbyshire, one of America's many sad clowns, this is right up there with the time he kept referring to Obama as "boy" and his wife as a "shakedown artist" literally RIGHT after he was elected:

DERBYSHIRE: Among the hopes that I do not realistically nurse is the hope that female suffrage will be repealed. But I’ll say this – if it were to be, I wouldn’t lose a minute’s sleep.

COLMES: We’d be a better country if women didn’t vote?

DERBYSHIRE: Probably. Don’t you think so?

COLMES: No, I do not think so whatsoever.

DERBYSHIRE: Come on Alan. Come clean here [laughing].

COLMES: We would be a better country? John Derbyshire making the statement, we would be a better country if women did not vote.

DERBYSHIRE: Yeah, probably.


Of course, Derbyshire sounds a lot like Ann Coulter:

If we took away women’s right to vote, we’d never have to worry about another Democrat president. It’s kind of a pipe dream, it’s a personal fantasy of mine, but I don’t think it’s going to happen. And it is a good way of making the point that women are voting so stupidly, at least single women.


Coulter and Derbyshire, who cares what those two guys think. Just keep 'em away from prepubescent girls.

It took him about one F.U. after it was obvious

But Tom Friedman gets something right and manages NOT to quote a third-party to speak for him. Maybe Broder should play a round of golf with Obama?

I was in Israel interviewing Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin just before he was assassinated in 1995. We had a beer in his office. He needed one. I remember the ugly mood in Israel then — a mood in which extreme right-wing settlers and politicians were doing all they could to delegitimize Rabin, who was committed to trading land for peace as part of the Oslo accords. They questioned his authority. They accused him of treason. They created pictures depicting him as a Nazi SS officer, and they shouted death threats at rallies. His political opponents winked at it all.

And in so doing they created a poisonous political environment that was interpreted by one right-wing Jewish settler as a license to kill Rabin — he must have heard, “God will be on your side” — and so he did...

And Mr. Obama is now having his legitimacy attacked by a concerted campaign from the right fringe. They are using everything from smears that he is a closet “socialist” to calling him a “liar” in the middle of a joint session of Congress to fabricating doubts about his birth in America and whether he is even a citizen. And these attacks are not just coming from the fringe. Now they come from Lou Dobbs on CNN and from members of the House of Representatives.

Hey Right-Wingers how's it hangin'?

Not enough to tell apparently.

KKKlassy:

A new Newsmax column advocates a military coup to unseat Obama or usher in a period of "shared responsibility" between military government and a ceremonial Obama presidency. "A coup is not an ideal option, but Obama's radical ideal is not acceptable or reversible."


Klassier:

Barack Obama should be called the first Muslim American President. […] But there is evidence that a lot of Muslims think he is Muslim. But whether he is or whether he isn’t, the key to me, is is he pursuing that is indistinguishable in important respects from that of the Muslim Brotherhood, whose mission ladies and gentlemen, we know from a trial in Dallas last year, is to quote to destroy Western civilization


KKKlassiest:

Right-Wing Conference Tells Activists To Get Their Guns Ready For ‘Bloody Battle’ With Obama The Nazi


Meawhile, some ponder how this happens:

Secret Service investigating Facebook poll asking ‘Should Obama be killed?’


It certainly cannot be because of the rhetoric above...

How dare he!

President will spend a few hours in Denmark lobbying for the 2016 Olympics in Chicago. Just like the President of Brazil, the Prime Minister of Japan, and the King of Spain for their respective bids. And he'll actually be working in Copenhagen, not being like me and desperately looking for Hash Bars only to discover that's Amsterdam (hire me now WaPo!).

And the Republican reaction?
"I think at a time of war, I think at a time of recession, at a time where Americans have expressed rather significantly their concerns and frustrations over the course of the spring and summer ... this trip, while nice, is not necessary for the president," Steele said in a conference call with reporters Tuesday.


Yes, "time of war" and all that:
BEIJING — Halfway around the world, U.S. President George Bush managed to cap his Olympic experience at a place he calls home: a baseball field...Never before had a U.S. president taken part in an Olympics on foreign land. Bush came and soaked it in for four days.
"Not necessary for the President" - Michael Steele


"At a time of war" [Not really a war to Kissinger if Cambodia isn't involved]

Personally, I don't mind the flying to Copenhagen as long as there is also a plan to have certain Democrats in Congress visit the White House for a public option.

[cross-posted at Firedoglake]

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Encrusted Black Cocktail Dresses for Jesus

But he/she isn't FAT!

So, let me get this straight: CBS Early Show host Harry Smith interviewed Ann Coulter after she called him "certifiably insane" -- but the morning show has allegedly cancelled a scheduled Michael Moore appearance out of fear that he will criticize CBS?

Oh Sweet Potato and Sawdust Loving Jesus

It's like that Saturday Night Live skit years ago where Dan Ackroyd played the toy-manufactured of "Bag of Broken Glass" and the "Johnny Switchblade Action Figure".

...on Friday [Michelle Bachman] achieved a new level of celebrity status -- in the form of her own action figure.

The Connecticut-based toy company Herobuilders plans to release the doll today on its website.


Of course, they also make an Obama action figure which they have classify made to look like a lawn jockey.

But lets not sell them short, you can make Bachman's action figure and Palin's action figure GET BIZZZ-AY in your own 'Women's Prison" video.

If you wanted to know


How long it would take to scan Nixon's memoirs, delete "Watergate" and "Vietnam" and replace "Lemon Ranch" with "Salmon Fishing" well now you know. Sarah Palin's paid ghostwriter has finisher her memoirs. Going Rogue: An American Life is due out November 17th -- just in time to save Bill O'Reilly's Christmas. It is all of 400 whole pages long, undoubtedly double-spaced and in 18-point dot pitch it will also include pictures, fan-fiction, sudoku puzzles, and scratch-n-sniff plates.

America's Concern Troll

Why doesn't Obama threaten to blow brown people up, repeatedly ask to punch people in the face rhetorically, judge comedy, sleep with another guy's wife, or sexually harass a woman like a real leader?

I'm concerned I tell ya', C-O-N-C-E-R-N-E-D!!!

(Yes, that's two different and consecutive Dicky Cohen posts -- I apologize to posterity)

I don't mean to be too much like Tom Shales

After all, who'd want to be that, there's already so much of it (but at least it's better than too much Richard "I'm a funny guy" Cohen). But can no one else just say that 90 minutes of Seth McFarlane is about 60 minutes too much?

Maybe I'm just officially old -- or have one small, microscopic, bit of taste.

Thank Goodness we live in an age

When I can find out Richard Cohen's (aka America's Concern Troll) thoughts on statutory rape and its effect upon famous people and the people who cannot help but pontificating about things like statutory rape.

Behold the golden age!

Detroit fans forget how to celebrate victories


The man in the black shirt has just been informed that Bobby Layne did not engage in celebratory sodomy...or at least waited until he got to the Briggs Stadium locker room.

via Deadspin

Monday, September 28, 2009

I'm tellin' ya' Orly Taitz might as well have been the 20th Hijacker!



(via Huffington Post)

William Safire R.I.P.



Let's take this moment, upon his demise to kick Nixon a few more times.



I'm guessing Ellis Washington, authorized biographer for the conservative intellectual Dr. Michael Savage thinks this quote is AWESOME!

You Stay Classy World Nut Daily



Article actually contains this quote:

How can Bolton and Netanyahu, two seemingly rational, educated and intellectual men hear President Obama's U.N. speech Wednesday and come to such diametrical opposite conclusions? Both men proudly claim that they are conservatives; both men claim that they believe in a strong, independent, defensible Israel with an indivisible capital at Jerusalem. Answer: One man is a statesman like Sir Winston Churchill; the other is a politician, an appeaser like Neville Chamberlain.


That's right, they are accusing Netanyahu of being Neville Chamberlain AND John Bolton of being like Winston Churchill.

When Obama says, "… and a viable, independent Palestinian state with contiguous territory that ends the occupation that began in 1967 and realizes the potential of the Palestinian people," he is using perhaps the most evil, anti-Semitic language I've ever heard from any American president against Israel.


But when Nixon, Carter, Reagan, Bush I, Clinton, and Bush II said the same thing, it was AWESOME!

And just how insane is Ellis Washington? Why this insane:


Ellis Washington, authorized biographer for the conservative intellectual Dr. Michael Savage (see www.MichaelSavage.com)

And an even bigger PRICK is found

Un-fucking believable. If some left-winger had done this it would be on the chat shows for 10 straight days, but at least the proponent (and probably some of the "yes" voters) will be getting deserved visits from the Secret Service.

P-R-I-C-K!

In limptastic action. I give you Dan Riehl, paste-eater:

Was Census Worker Bill Sparkman A Child Predator?

Update: Before any more people start going bonkers that I'm accusing Sparkman of anything, take a breath. ... . ...All I'm doing is looking at any and all possibilities. ... Why strip him naked and bind and gag him, which has serious sexual overtones?


Other than there is no reason to even contemplate the man was such a thing (other than Dan Riehl being a prick of course), stripping someone naked doesn't really indicate much at all about the victim, but rather the perpetrator -- and "FED" is not exactly the kind of thing you write on to a person's chest.

Ah, but if you are a twisted jerk, it makes all the sense in the world I guess.

Even as a Viking fan I have to say


The "Favre, Favre, Far-vit-ty, Favre" over the next week is going to be unbearable now.

UPDATE:

I went 2 and 4 again this weekend. I do not see how ESPN can avoid hiring me now. And here's your moment of over-the-top irrationality and snark.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Well this is a reason to be proud

This sure makes Iowa look, uh, well not terribly awesome. Guy who is in jail for thrice violating a protective order gets let out to see a Red Sox game in Kansas City.

Dear Right-Wing Self-Proclaimed Constitutional "Scholars"

Barack Obama did not invent the census. That little thing called the Constitution has more than just the Second Amendment to it:


Representatives and direct Taxes shall be apportioned among the several States which may be included within this Union, according to their respective Numbers, which shall be determined by adding to the whole Number of free Persons, including those bound to Service for a Term of Years, and excluding Indians not taxed, three fifths of all other Persons. The actual Enumeration shall be made within three Years after the first Meeting of the Congress of the United States, and within every subsequent Term of ten Years, in such Manner as they shall by Law direct.

Article I, Section 2


You'd think, especially with a black man in the White House you'd know about that clause because it contains that whole 3/5ths of a person thing. But then again, you always drop the first clause the the Second Amendment too, so I guess your consistent in your inconsistency.

But Michelle Bachmann has too much on her plate and too little in her head.

In the link look at this picture of Beck and Bachmann. You know that Beck is just waiting to get back to his office to masturbate.

Atta J. Turk's "Trusty" NFL Picks

Well after going 4 and 2 in week one, I went 2 and 4 last week which means I am .500 at picking games straight up. Which is not very good -- but certainly good enough to get me a gig on ESPN Deportes. And a much higher percentage than the combined panelists of the Chris Matthews Show ("tell me something I don't know?" -- Well, Chris, you're creating a rather broad swath of things for me to choose from. For example, did you know that gelatin is essentially ground up cow bones? Did you know Frankfort is the capitol of Kentucky? Did you know you are a gigantic douchebag?)

Anyhoo, I'll try to do better -- and remember if you are using my picks for gambling purposes, you deserve to lose money.


Washington at Detroit
: Many prognosticators feeling the need to just say something provocative other than Tom Brady married beneath him are picking the Lions to beat the Redskins. Now look, it's hard not to cheer for the Lions -- they suck so bad, their fans deserve a win so much -- and there's only so much alcohol (but this is too cruel). But once again, my policy is to state when it suits my purposes that the team with the most superfluously inappropriate name and helmet will beat the team it should beat. You can ignore this when I repeatedly violate this policy in the following weeks because I will. Sorry Detroit. So very sorry.


Indianapolis at Arizona
: I think it's important that in a match up between Peyton Manning and Kurt Warner that the announcers be required to discuss Brett Favre. Indy is coming off a Monday night game on the road and then playing on Sunday on the road. My sixth sense that comes with all prognostication tells me that this should matter. So I'll take the Cardinals.


Green Bay at St. Louis
: Hey, I need to be sure of winning one game this week. The Packers were delightfully sucky last week, which delighted me to no end as they have been incredibly over-hyped coming out of the preseason. Plus, I'm from Minnesota so I'm just wired to enjoy them getting beaten. But some rationality has to prevail and as much as I might wish it otherwise, the Rams are miserable and determined to show it in front of their fans who apparently are there because they couldn't get tickets to see the Cardinals. Packers prevail rather easily.

Jacksonville at Houston: I'm sure this was the game you were waiting for me to pick. The whole world revolves around awaiting this game's outcome. Oh, who am I kidding? The real purpose of this post might as well be for me to deride ESPN's makeup or directors as I watch this morning's SportsCenter. Cindy Brunson seems a very competent newsreader and has a sort of mature, intelligent, sexiness about her. Sort of a 'Tina Fey for the Jock Crowd' thing going on. But somebody needs to tell her to lay off the pancake makeup and heavy eye mascara. You're not Tammy Faye Baker -- oy. Oh yeah, I better pick a winner here, Cindy's Avon Rep. suggests the Texans and who am I to disagree?


San Francisco at Minnesota
: Minnesota has beaten two relative chumps handily but San Francisco won two in the NFC West and I don't care if the Cardinals made it to the Super Bowl last year, they were asleep until last week. Everybody pays attention to Favre, but the Vikings Defense and Peterson is why they win and why they'll win this week. But as sick as the whole Favre soap opera is, much of it comes from media's incessant focus of it. Peter King for example, has a definite feel of a spurned lover in talking about him, when, in fact, he should be delighted. Look Peter, you moved to Boston in a thinly-veiled effort to be close to your new spouse Tom Brady -- having given up the idea of moving to Northeast Wisconsin. Tim Tebow doesn't come out until next year (and by the way, Tebow come out already) so really Favre came back for one more year for you baby. It's sad you're acting so upset about it.

Aw dammit, I have to pick one more game to live up to the bullshit rules I made for myself and that nobody else cares about.

Okay.

Denver at Oakland
: JaMarcus Russell sure looks impressive standing on sidelines and in warm ups. But then he has to play and he completes 8 out of 27 passes or something and appears to set the QB position back to the single-wing era and he's throwing a rugby ball to Don Hutson's less talented brother George W. Hutson. You've got to be a special version of shitty to complete less than 40 percent of your throws in the modern NFL game. But the Raiders are just the team to break the stereotype about need to throw the ball effectively. There's no logical reason to say this but the Raiders are almost 2 and 0 despite the fact their QB is horrendously awful. I think this game is a breakthrough -- Russell will have the game Raider fans dream of and complete a percentage of passes admirable for pee wee football and complete 5 of 12 and the Raiders will win, just pass the Autumn Wind baby!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

And afterwords the scary stuffed animatronic puppets started singing


Happy Birthday, apparently, to the Prime Minister of Nepal.


(I apologize to any culturally offended Nepalese and/or sherpas)

Meanwhile,


If the President of Gambia goes around with a bong that big, it's only understandable he's got a permanent case of the munchies.

(ditto to any Gambian-Americans)

Just like Hitler

The proof is supplied by Instaputz as Jonah Goldberg goes classy and apparently tweets from a funeral.

But what he really wanted to "twat"

Goth girls

I don't know why, but I find this totally awesome and hilarious at the same time. The Prime Minister of Spain Jose Zapetero brought his entire family to the G-20 (apparently they're big Steeler fans or something) and lo and behold, his two daughters are either goths or emos.
So did Barack and Michelle talk about thrash metal or 'Twilight'?

And why couldn't the Bush Daughters have been that much fun?

Friday, September 25, 2009

Twitter, where any chump blogger can point and laugh at you

Observe the process at work:

















































And how does that compare to September 15th when Michael Moore (who in case you didn't know it is FAT) appeared on Leno?



And I'm just enough of an asshole to do this:


General Public to Teabaggers..."whatever"

I guess that didn't make much of a dent with the public.



But then again, it managed to scare Rahm and Max anyway so I guess the vast majority of us don't matter.

It's Raining Ten-Thousand Men of Harvard


Young men of the Crimson, shave those incomplete goatees and oil those concealed pecs and sign up for "Cougar & Boxed Wine 101" because Peggy Noonan is ready to tut-tut for you personally.

As part of the application process, candidates are asked to write up a syllabus of the course they will enlighten impressionable young undergrads with. Noonan wrote hers like she writes her column: She poured a glass of white wine, put on some Commodores, curled up in a big comfy chair with a Snuggie, and turned on the crazy...

It is often said that writing is a solitary act, and that is true –- it's you and your brain, your soul and your response to something that's happening either in the world or in your head. And you bring to it, to this subject, what knowledge you have of life, and of man, and of history. But at the same time it is not a solitary act if you are lucky enough to have an audience for your work.


Oh yes, Ve-Ri-Tas -- a private audience with Peggums to evaluate your work and discuss how both you and Harvard fit like a glove because of your impressive and sizeable endowment.



I'm sorry so many of my posts this morning have made you throw up a little.

Michelle Duggar. Suck. On. This.

Sorry, that title creeped me out a bit. I better do some yoga (that's Hindi for "look at porn" right?).

...

Okay, I'm back and somehow that did not work.

What the fuck is it about Arkansas (home of the outrageously fecund Duggar family), but not even Jim Bob and Michelle have managed to use their system of viscous fluids and pulleys to make this happen:

This June doctors were shocked to discover that Arkansas native Julia Grovenburg was pregnant with not one, but two children. The second, smaller child was unexpectedly located by doctors and is thought to have been conceived two-and-a-half weeks after the first one.

Of course, maybe there's a reason they didn't brag much

After all, this is the one of the alleged "potential" "terrorizers" that was arrested:

Well, in his defense, he is a mature adult

Ambinder says something non-villagesque:

The FBI and NYPD may have broken up the biggest domestic terrorism plot since Sept. 11. And this administration, deliberately, chose to stay in the background, chose to let senior law enforcement officials take the lead, and did nothing to generate the sort of panic and fear that the office of the president, when marshaled to discuss these types of things, can bring to bear, even by accident.


For which we can all be grateful.

If this was the Bush Administration they'd do nothing until late October 2010 and then trumpet the arrest as why you should be scared enough to vote Republican.

Bizarrely placed ads of the internet

When you are a big blog and take blogads and such, you don't know just what's going to turn up.

I don't have that problem, of course, because I'm not that big a blog.

But still, this one seems a little too creepy.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Awesome, is Michelle Malkin going to be marching with them?

Or Drudge, because they helped inspire the march?

Two rallies are planned Saturday in response to a recent attack on school bus -- one linked to several white supremacy groups and a counter protest hosted by a reverend...

...The protest has been promoted on several supremacist Web sites, including the National Socialist Movement and Stormfront.org.

Great moments in utter stupidity

I'd never seen this before, FoxNews Morning Morons in 2005 interview Roger Daltrey and Peter Gabriel.

Incredibly Kilmeade and company seem to have no freakin' clue who the hell these two older English Gentlemen are and though, of course, Daltrey and Gabriel know each other, they have no idea why they are on together and what the hell is with the idiots who are interviewing them.



In a way its very entertaining to see such imbeciles try to interview two people that everyone else knows quite well while they are utterly and typically clueless.

You can just tell Daltrey and Gabriel got the hell out of there for a good stiff drink and a big laugh at their expense.

Brainiac

Shorter Chuck Norris (because it's all the dialogue he can handle):

"True Patriots Deface Flags"


Remember when the right-wing have a hissy fit about this concept in the 90s? The wanted to "desecrate" the First Amendment over it.

Ah, the "Circle of Right".

MATLOCK!!!


David Broder once again read some conservative bloviators about how Obama's too gosh darn ambitious. Stop the Presses! And with editorials like this, that'll happen at the Washington Post soon enough. Yes, Obama needs to be -- even more, Republican! Poor Rahm, he's been working so hard, but it's never good enough for "the Dean".


The progressives believed that the cure lay in applying the new wisdom of the social sciences to the art of government, an approach in which facts would heal the clash of ideologies and narrow constituencies...

Historically, that approach has not worked. The progressives failed to gain more than brief ascendancy


Somehow David Broder ignores the three most successful legislative Presidents of the 20th century were the policy-ambitious FDR, LBJ, and a progressive Republican, Theodore Roosevelt. Apparently he does this so he can kick Clinton and Carter a few more times.


Franklin Roosevelt made sweeping policy changes that put one party in control of Congress for the longest period in American History, more than sixty years. During that time it managed to pass strong civil rights laws; sweeping securities, labor, and financial reforms; social security and medicare. Even Republican presidents avoided significantly altering its fundamental accomplishments.

It won THE war, it made the peace, it created the middle class and the longest period of prosperity in American history. It started by burying the depression and ended by burying the Soviet Union, in between it only beat Hitler and Jim Crow. What a fucking failure! Thank goodness we finally decided it had to change because rich peoples' taxes were too high.

But David Broder, can take comfort in his apparently belief the last great Democratic President was Grover Cleveland, with whom he probably ate quail.


[cross-posted at Firedoglake]

I'm not going to jump on this one

Well, with greater CAPITALIZATION, until it becomes clear that what is purported to have happened, is more clearly shown to have been what actually happened, though it's becoming clearer it probably was just as awful as initially reported.

But if the initial reports are true, this is just awful and blood is on the hands of Glenn Beck (tragically and ironically the victim's body was found on 9/12) and Michelle Bachmann -- and hell the GOP leadership that just lets this reckless shit go on without a slapdown.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Glenn Beck Viewers Unite!


The stupid, it burns and burns and burns some more:

Richard and Jacqueline Ruhl weren’t trying to offend anyone with a float they created for the Fredericktown Tomato Show Parade, they were merely trying to get the attention of their fellow citizens and encourage them to let their voices be heard.

They designed a float that coupled the Nazi flag with an image of President Barack Obama with a swastika around his arm. It also contained the phrase, “Wake up America.“ The float was denied entry into the parade by the Tomato Show Board of Directors because board members felt it detracted from the family-friendly atmosphere the parade was dedicated to creating.

The Three current mind-altering laments of the press


1. Is Obama overexposed?




2. Is Bill Clinton taking attention away from Obama that could be better spent wondering if the latter is overexposed?





3. Why do I keep writing stories about John Edwards when there's all this Obama overexposure to ponder?

"I can see a Manchurian Candidate from here"


Sarah Palin around with Communists:

Palin, the former governor of Alaska, gave hundreds of financial big-hitters at the CLSA Investors' Forum in Hong Kong a wide-ranging speech...


aka, "rambling".

"She was brilliant," said a European delegate, on condition of anonymity.


Looks like one of the Polish twins was there.

Two US delegates left early, with one saying "it was awful, we couldn't stand it any longer". He declined to be identified.


Oh, Levi, we already know it was.

(pic via AFP/CLSA/Jeff Topping)

Sorry, but Teabow clearly saves that for the Governor*

Somebody's parents are real proud and undoubtedly real Republican:






*Not that there's anything wrong with that, and yes, I apologize, but come on that line is just sitting there.

How can one state, let alone one ESTATE hold both egos?

Trump & Gaddafi sharing one property?

As Karl Rove told George W. Bush, somebody has to be the catcher.

KKKlassy

Just the sort of thing you want to plow into youngsters -- and irredeemable and irrational hatred of others based on grotesque propoganda:

SOMERSET, Ky. (AP) -- A Somerset parent is upset because of a short film shown to his daughter's class at Pulaski County High School...

Cruey said his daughter is receiving counseling and has been pulled from the class after seeing images of beheadings, children being injured and dead bodies interspersed with readings from the Koran.

The film is by Dutch anti-immigration lawmaker Geert Wilders.

Pulaski County Superintendent Tim Eaton says the presentation was meant to commemorate 9-11 and discuss the dangers of extremism, but that the teacher used poor judgment showing the film.


No shit Sherlock, this peace of "genocide porn" is up there with "The Eternal Jew" in slandering a group of people, so naturally it is fucking loved by the Ann Coulter-types of the world.

Why do I have a sneaky suspicion though that this school district had problems with having the President who pulled himself up by his own bootstraps and became y'know the fulfillment of the platitudinous 'American Dream' because it was styled as "propoganda"?

Maybe Rahm and Barack will stop adhearing to it?

More of that beloved beltway wisdom and its incredible accuracy:

...who will get blamed if health care doesn't get passed this year? Per the poll, 10% say Obama, 16% say congressional Democrats, and 37% say congressional Republicans.


Maybe, just maybe, it's time to stop giving concessions to those who are not going to vote for the bill anyway?

Maybe wisdom would be not producing a shitty bill?

But who am I, but a mere dirty fucking hippy?

Beltway Wisdom

About as accurate as usual:

With President Obama appearing on five Sunday-morning news programs and with him sitting down with David Letterman last night, the political chattering class has asked this question: Is Obama overexposed?


And, except in the world of Broder and Howie Kurtz -- and those who aren't voting for a Democrat anyway the answer is:

In the poll, 34% say they see and hear Obama too much, 9% say they see/hear him too little, and 54% say it's the right amount.

A small window into my empty life

This seems so Larry King/Peter King/Burger King-esque, but I love reading this every week (American football related) wherein the most inane columnist this side of yes, Larry King -- Peter King is skewered. A sample:

I can’t let this column top pass without acknowledging the greatness of Ray Lewis.

I can’t let this sentence pass without acknowledging the horrible, horrible play call that was practically designed to ensure that Ray Lewis would make a game-saving tackle and get undue adulation he doesn’t really deserve. Let’s assume you’re Norv Turner. Don’t look in the mirror! You won’t like the face you see! Now, it’s 4th and 2 with :30 left. You need a touchdown. Your quarterback has passed for over 400 yards. You have rushed for a meager 2.5 yards a carry. Do you decide:

A) Pass the ball, or
B) Bunch together as tightly as you can, allow the defense to stack the line, and run your smallest back right up the gut, even though he runs better in space, and even though your starting center is out, and even though it’s the single dumbest fucking play ever designed at any point in time by any coach ever in the history of everything ever.

Good call. Lofty call.

The Fine Fifteen

2. Minnesota (2-0).

Minnesota has beaten Cleveland and Detroit. They have yet to have their quarterback throw the ball farther than ten yards. They define not applicable.

…the Vikes woke up, and Brett Favre played like a 25-year-old.

Or a 39-year-old with a bad shoulder.

Or 35-year-old.

Or a 39-year-old with a bad shoulder.

Whatever.

“You know what? Just disregard everything I say.”

Imagine playing on the road,

Against the Lions.

against a team with a fired-up crowd,

That is cheering for the Lions.

indoors,

Where the Lions won NO games last year.

and your 39-year-old quarterback has four incompletions all day.

Against the Lions. Amazing story. Quite possibly the greatest accomplishment of Brett Favre’s career, except for that one time he leg whipped a guy so that his teammates would love him.

...

My best friend thinks Tony Dungy sounds like Cleveland in Family Guy. Your thoughts?

Your best friend needs to meet more black people.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

I-O-W-A

Never a slow newsday...

Nice!

"Is Obama overexposed?"


See me ask this question in my daily column; on my CNN show; on my twitter page; and on Facebook.

FoxNews, enjoying the benefits of a Conservative Education

NOTHING "gets" by Greta...except obvious shit like grammar (or a surgeon's scalpel/botox needle) They must be employing NRO's non-editing editors:

Room full of geniuses

I'll ignore the silly and degrading statements that the spokesmodel for the conservative 'Young America Foundation' made about women at the ill-named Values Voters Summit and just focus on the dumb one:

Mattera evoked the battle of David against Goliath as a metaphor for conservative college students who are ‘persecuted’ by the big bad liberals who control academia.”...
“‘David has the righteous answer,’ Mattera said, ‘because he is taking pride in his Christian beliefs.’


David's in the Old Testament dumbass, say what you will about him, but he wasn't a Christian.

Ol' Abe then cracked a nice bromide about favoring gun control

Via TBogg, behold the awesomeness of Republican Art:


(Notice how in a GOP hagiographic painting Lincoln is shown from the John Wilkes Booth perspective)

If only Ike had large saucer-like eyes this could have given the work an even more real Dogs playing Poker quality.

Meet your new Desktop Wallpaper

Via Bad Astronomer:



Follow the link above to see it in all its gigantic glory.

Stay Classy in your Members Only Jacket

Is Ahmadinejad on the payroll of the Heritage Foundation or something as the cartoon villain determined to be the jackass that keeps anything from ever happening?

Iran's president said Monday he is proud to stoke international outrage with his latest remarks denying the Holocaust as he heads for the United Nations this week — showing he is as defiant as ever while his country comes under greater pressure to curtail its nuclear program.


And in recent speeches he has been even more offensive than that.

Pinhead

Not satisfied getting history wrong on every other day and offending two-thirds of the world's major monotheistic faiths, Glenn Beck goes for the Creep-fecta and politicizes Yom Kippur, the Jewish Day of Atonement. He does this, as usual, by getting history wrong and being offensive.

You know what Glenn Beck will do for Yom Kippur? I bet he pays his buddies in the Mormon Church to make a few more Jewish victims into posthumous Mormons.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Sure, she's crazy


A Full-out Moldovan Mor(a)n, but you have to admit, her self-proclaimed signature line would make for one hell of a "high-concept" television series for syndication:

Orly Taitz DDS Esq

Tying it all together


Going back to yesterday's post about how conservatives just LOVE their porn, and the fact that nobody seems to point out the outrageous waste of tax dollars the Cowboys stadium is, I give you this.

The new Cowboys stadium has, yes, "Cage Dancing".





UPDATE: And Jerry Jones is still diggin' for gold. Still that's two picks fewer than Romo.

Less arbitrary than his Administration

I hope someone explained the concept of the "coin-flip" too him.

I bet he enjoyed the fact it costs tax payers a billion dollars and "truly" accomplished a better education and health care for the local citizenry.

And yet another black man to officiate over a pending Bush disaster.

(UNITED STATES SPORT FOOTBALL)

I'm totally prepared for this future Friedman column



"I played, uh, jai-alai, yeah, jai-alai, with a, uh, kenyan, yeah, a kenyan, ox-cart entrepreneur named - uh- Murack, that's it. And we discussed how in this age of internet news and twitter and facebook and such we need to listen to the sage advice of well-married newspaper columnists to tell us what to think, except for the Washington Post Editorial page because those guys really suck."

An internet radio moment so "AWESOME" there's no way you need hear it



Although worst mentholatum sandwich ever comes to mind.

That $1.15 billion stadium

That forgot to thank the taxpayers for building it -- that had George Bush as special guest -- sure must have comforted the nation's poor, unemployed, underinsured, uninsured, bankrupt and foreclosed last night.

Especially the classy video trumping it as surpassing the Parthenon, Great Wall, the Taj Mahal and the Colosseum.

Stuff they "forget" to mention on FoxNoise

Why go after ACORN?

James O'Keefe, one of the two filmmakers, said he went after ACORN because it registers minorities likely to vote against Republicans


Well, we can't have that.

Meanwhile, I imagine O'Keefe is branching out to sporting events.

Some Change to believe in

Let the neo-cons and paleo-cons howl, the world has changed and this is the wisest move he could make:

Barack Obama has demanded the Pentagon conduct a radical review of US nuclear weapons doctrine to prepare the way for deep cuts in the country's arsenal, the Guardian can reveal.

Obama has rejected the Pentagon's first draft of the "nuclear posture review" as being too timid, and has called for a range of more far-reaching options consistent with his goal of eventually abolishing nuclear weapons altogether, according to European officials.

Those options include:

• Reconfiguring the US nuclear force to allow for an arsenal measured in hundreds rather than thousands of deployed strategic warheads.

• Redrafting nuclear doctrine to narrow the range of conditions under which the US would use nuclear weapons.

• Exploring ways of guaranteeing the future reliability of nuclear weapons without testing or producing a new generation of warheads.


This is outstanding.

Speaking while stupid

You cannot stop Michael Steele from making moronic statements, you can only hope to keep them coming:

Steele: "Obama doesn't want Patterson to run for Governor because he's black."


I'm sure Glenn Beck can sort that one out.

The things you miss

On the television when sports are on.

Yesterday, the Glenn Beck Story was on TCM. I'm sure it will be on again soon.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Conservatives and Porn

The comedy never ever ends.

SCHWARTZ: And one of the things that he said to me, that I think is an astonishingly insightful remark. He said, “all pornography is homosexual pornography because all pornography turns your sexual drive inwards. Now think about that. And if you, if you tell an 11-year-old boy about that, do you think he’s going to want to go out and get a copy of Playboy? I’m pretty sure he’ll lose interest. That’s the last thing he wants.” You know, that’s a, that’s a good comment. It’s a good point and it’s a good thing to teach young people.


Oh yes, encourage the nation's 11-year old boys to buy Playboy so they can turn gay.

Yeah, that's just what'll happen.

It's really stunning these mor(a)ns can even find the proper hole when they try to procreate.

I also truly love the fact that these folks LOVE FoxNews, whose owner Ruper Murdoch is the inventor of the Page3 girl and owns DirectTV, probably the nation's No. 1 provider of porn.

You think Rupert is going to stop peddling porn, when it's the greatest cash-cow in his shaky empire? You think Right-wingers are going to push him? Hell no, they love buying that shit as much as the next person -- the freakier the better. They don't call it "the money shot" for nothing.

Matlock!!!


Max Baucus is my hero, after Ben Matlock, oh and also those Republicans I can never bring myself to criticize.

Atta J. Turk's trusty football picks week 2

Because this is first and foremost not a gambling site.

Last Week 4 and 2.

New England over NY Jets: Because the hoodie is strong in the battle of the leagues two most slovenly coaches. But mostly because this is an AFL match up which means throw-backs, New England's throwbacks, rather awesome. The Jets, the same putrid "Titans" throwback they've had the last two years. C'mon, Jets use this throwback.


Steelers over Bears
: I really cannot get enough of watching Jay Cutler throw picks and pouting. Have you noticed how much he looks like fat-faced Chip from My Three Sons? It's really quite striking. Not that Ben Roethlisberger's any prize. In fact, I'm calling it, these are the two ugliest QBs in the NFL. But Chip Douglas has to lose.


Jaguars over Cardinals
. There are approximately 10,000 seats or more still available for this gridiron classic. But I have to favor the home team in the Apathy Bowl.

Seahawks over 49ers. Yes, I've picked two NFC West Games in a row (plus the Jacksonville Jaguars). Nobody gives a shit about these games, nobody pays attention, and nobody will notice I'll say I go 2 and 0 whether I do or not. My only real regret is that somehow Michael Crabtree can't lose.

Bills over Bucs
. You may have noticed I am really picking the important games lately. The Buccaneers have never visited Buffalo. Tragically, William McKinley couldn't say the same thing. *rimshot* Too soon? Try the veal wings and blue cheese.

Saints over Eagles. Donovan McNabb is injured - yet again. I believe he was replaced for a short period by his understudy Kevin Kolb last year and it was, well a short-lived disaster. I'd like to remind folks that Kevin Kolb bears a passable resemblance to Leon Czolgosz. You know if I had a lame joke about the Maine, Cuba or the Philippines, I'd have exhausted my McKinley material.

Shorter WaPo Ombudsman Andy

Pity the poor WaPo editors, the most powerless people in the world. Mere victims of circumstance.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

McClatchy once again

Does the best job of any journalistic organization of practicing, oh, I don't know, journalism.

There's no denying Obama's race plays a role in protests

Bon Voyage

Christy Hardin Smith is stepping down from Firedoglake, which is a little like when Chet Huntley stepped down from the Huntley-Brinkley Report (and I'm not really old enough to remember that, just anal retentive enough to know about it). If I remember right, and you think I would, I started writing at FDL because she asked me to write about the Plame-Wilson suit against the Bush Administration and its legal chances.

Anyway, best wishes to her.

ruh-roh

Rupert's in financial stress again:

The world’s most famous stock index, the Dow Jones Industrial Average, may get a new owner and possibly a name change after 113 years, if Rupert Murdoch’s News Corporation follows through on selling its stock-index business.

The Wall Street Journal, owned by Dow Jones until its sale to News Corporation in 2007, has reported the company is exploring a sale of the unit.


Oh, I hope it becomes the "Vivid Video Industrial Average".

Friday, September 18, 2009

Michael Gerson wants you to know


"There's no health care crisis!" Now, Iraq and Saddam's non-existent stockpile of chemical and biological weapons? NOW THAT WAS A CRISIS.

Meanwhile, in liberal-tainted reality:

Nearly 45,000 people die in the United States each year -- one every 12 minutes -- in large part because they lack health insurance and can not get good care, Harvard Medical School researchers found in an analysis released on Thursday.


In parlance Michael Gerson will willfully misunderstand, that's fifteen "9/11s" annually. (Earlier versions of this post fucked up the math, I blame, uh, well someone else).

"Where's my kiss-ass Cover Story, Mr. Stengel?"

"If I don't get it, I'll publish your home address and phone number and camp out where your children attend private school.

Sincerely,

Michelle Malkin"


Oh no, it certainly isn't racism

What what...




A whole series of similar pics here.

And, at least, on my PC, there's a not very well-placed ad for ex-Iowa Governor Terry Brandstad that would absolutely thrill him, if he were capable of using a computer.

Heckuva Job Bush

This explains both the incredible stupidity of the teabaggers who never lifted a goddamned thing other than a No. 2 pencil to vote for Bush along with why certain groups are proportionately amongst their makeup.

The incomes of the young and middle-aged — especially men — have fallen off a cliff since 2000, leaving many age groups poorer than they were even in the 1970s, a USA TODAY analysis of new Census data found.

People 54 or younger are losing ground financially at an unprecedented rate in this recession, widening a gap between young and old that had been expanding for years.


Eight years of screwing the middle class. But hey, at least the cost of health-care and a college-education sky-rocketed -- and we got two unending wars out of the deal, so you have that.

I believe back when they were young men, these gentlemen covered it best:

This is really sad

But I'm still laughing amidst the ability of people to either be gullible or not give a shit.

Remember Kenny Gladney the self-proclaimed (well, technically others proclaimed for him) victim of liberal thuggery in St. Louis?

Well, apparently he's chocolate Elvis without the talent and he's just doing what his own personal Colonel Parker demands of him as an employee.

And now, that guy is truly screwing Gladney out of what actual legal protections he might have.

Putting the douche into teabaggery.

Another person Will Rogers never met

Chuck Grassley, who thinks like he twitters, is now pretending to be mad because apparently the Obama Administration long-ago (?) figured out his little game on pretending to negotiate:


“I’ll tell you, there’s some things that the president has said since then that I took very personally,” Grassley said. “He gave some speeches during August in which he was associating me with efforts to make this a political document.”


Well, golly Corn-pone Socrates why would he do that? Oh right... you sent this out in early August:



[cross-posted at Firedoglake]