Monday, July 31, 2006

The Pantheon

Over the years, we've had a series of incredibly stupid Bush faces, memorable in their rank vacuity and petulance. Tonight, we have a new addition to the collection.


Prior Winners:


The Drunken Baffoon


The Butt Plug


The Charles Nelson Reilly


The Joker


Today's Winner:

Fool descending a staircase popularity rating.

(AP Photo/Haraz N. Ghanbari)

Anyone in the media want to call someone on their bullshit?

Bush in mid-July:

"[W]e must also remember that embryonic stem cells come from human embryos. … Each of these human embryos is a unique human life with inherent dignity and matchless value,"


Bush today:

President Bush acknowledged growing international pressure for an immediate Middle East cease-fire Monday but dismissed any idea of simply "stopping for the sake of stopping" without a plan for lasting peace.


So frozen embryos that are going to be researched upon rather than tossed in the garbage, bad.

The man who espouses the "Culture of Life" however has no urgency in stopping the killing "too early".

Genius E. Bush

From Froomkin:

Al Kamen writes in The Washington Post: "Sen. Robert Menendez (D-N.J.), at the White House this spring for a meeting with other senators to discuss immigration with President Bush, was surprised when Bush approached him as the meeting broke up and observed: 'Senator Martinez, you've been very quiet.'

" 'That's Martinez,' Menendez said, pointing to Mel Martinez -- Florida's junior senator and Bush's former secretary of housing and urban development.

" 'I'm Menendez.'

"Bush turned bright red, we're told."

Ponderables

What's the over/under on Ann Coulter writing a column either:

(a) Defending Mel Gibson;

or

(b) Claiming he's an out of touch Hollywood Liberal?

"In the Navy, yes, you can sail the seven seas"



If you like adventure
Don't you wait to enter
The recruiting office fast
Don't you hesitate,
There is no need to wait
They're signing up new seamen fast



Bush hangs with the COAST GUARD.

(AP Photo/Haraz N. Ghanbari)

"There's your short pier Mr. President"


"What say you to a long-walk off of it?"

REUTERS/Jim Young (UNITED STATES)

"Ah'm over mah head THIS MUCH"


That's our Bush, always misunderestimating.

(AP Photo/Lynne Sladky)

An Evening with the Ledeens, Episode One

(Last year, I tried to start a regular feature, but it tanked - and I'm going to pretend it wasn't because of the writing ... with him in the blogosphere again, I thought I'd bring it back and see if it matters)

And now, the RHTV is proud to present, another peek into the lives of America's favorite Neo-Con family, an Evening with the Ledeens:

EPISODE ONE: The Phantom Menace

Michael: Hey, Simone have you seen my car keys?

Simone: Sorry, pop, I took them out last night when I made a beer run. Hope you don't mind but I put 173 cases of Pabst on your credit card.

Micheal: 173! But how come I only saw two cases in the garage.

Simone: I lost the other 171, in fact, I think I left them in the parking lot and forgot to put them in the van.

Michael: You forgot to put them into my customized "Ayotollah Assaholamobile"?

Simone: Well, there were pretty lights and stuff.

Michael: But what about my car keys?

Simone: I'm sure I put them there on the coffee table. At least, I think I did. I may have dropped them down the gutter drain in the street, but I cannot be sure.

Michael: You think you left them on the coffee table? They are not there now. And I'm running late for this morning's "Brunch with the Bahai's for Bombing!", I got to go!

Simone: Sorry pop. But I'm relatively sure they did not fall down the gutter. No, I'd say there's a reasonably certain chance I put them on the coffee table.

Michael: Well, as long as you are reasonably sure. You know what I think happened?

Simone: No, pop, I'm sure whatever it is, it will be a theory completely supported by facts and will lead to the only possible logical explanation.


Michael
: You are absolutely so my daughter, I don't care what your mother says.

Simone: Thanks dad.

Michael: No, what happened to those keys is this: While we slept operatives from Iran's terrorist president, Mahmoud Ahmadi-Nezhad, the defense minister, Mostafa Mohammad-Najjar, and the heads of the Basij and Revolutionary Guards — the bloodiest arms of the regime, broke into our home. I am sure that they were intent to attack us, but our Massoud-trained toy poodle, "Netanyahu" scared them off scared them off before they could do us bodily harm.

Simone: Wow, dad, what a good puppy!

Michael: Yes, following in the footsteps of his canine forebears who, as you recall won the Yom Kippur War with nothing more than slobbery chew toys. But before they left, they were able to damage me in a most severe way. They took our keys to "Ayatollah Assaholamobile".

Simone: Wow, dad, that is so logical. And in their maliciousness, they did not even take the van. Oh, damn and that's what happened to the beer, not what I said earlier.

Michael: Absolutely dear. You are now learning your lessons from the master.

Let me just say

I agree with Watertiger, you must read Tom Tomorrow, summing up the Clusterfuck McBunnypants years.

But how can they get their arms around him

Him being so fat and all?

``If you were to hang out with me here it won't be five or 10 minutes before you see a Republican hug me. That is almost as entertaining as some of the films,'' Moore said in an interview.

Moore has not budged from the central claim of his 2004 documentary ``Fahrenheit 9/11'' -- that the Bush administration misled the American public about the reasons for war in Iraq -- but he says that more people have come around to his view.

``That's the shift that I'm seeing in the past year or so in the country, and as it relates to me,'' he said.

Some in solidly Republican northern Michigan and elsewhere now believe that they made a ``colossal mistake'' in initially supporting the war in Iraq, Moore said, and they have let him know it in chance encounters on the streets of Traverse City, a resort town where he has relocated from New York.


Why should Moore budge one iota from any of the claims made in 'Fahrenheit 911" let alone the central one?

Other than proclaiming him fat, what claim has the right wing actually proven about the film.

Here's some factual information that we now know:

- George Bush is a disaster
- Mel Gibson is an anti-semite
- Iraq is a fiasco
- Michael Moore was right

The fact that the right wing just off-handed uses Michael Moore to excuse rabid hate-slut Ann Coulter's behavior is all they have -- and it is about as accurate and verified as all their other positions.

How surprising

The Bush Administration somehow misses a meeting on global warming:

One of the higher-profile meetings on climate change is set to bring together this week British Prime Minister Tony Blair, California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger and about 25 chief executive officers of major corporations around the world.

But the Bush administration will be a conspicuous no-show...

..."This meeting just shows that climate change has moved to the top of the corporate agenda and the political agenda," said Steve Howard, CEO of Climate Group.

But President Bush's top environmental adviser, James Connaughton, won't attend, because of a scheduling conflict, said White House spokeswoman Kristen Hellmer.

Critics say Mr. Connaughton's absence follows an "obstructionist stance" by the White House on efforts to rein in emissions that many scientists say lead to global warming. The Bush administration pulled out of the 1997 Kyoto Protocol, an agreement signed by Britain and most other developed countries to cut greenhouse-gas emissions 5% below 1990 levels by 2012.


My guess is the scheduling conflict was of the "I better schedule a conflict" variety.

Satire is Dead

We've obviously been fighting a losing battle these five and a half years:


I can't out parody this, when you throw in the ululating...

Well, at least Mel Gibson can get past asking questions and get right on to calling her "sugar-substitute tits".

Oh Dear...


His brain is flatlining again. I hope the squirrel was still under warranty, because Halliburton has the contract on new ones.
REUTERS/Jason Reed

I wonder if...


Roger Aisles will call out President Bush on his arm positioning the way he called out Olbermann for the same thing?

(AFP/Paul J. Richards)

I think it has something to do with a womb

Willie Nelson says:

Willie Nelson says the Dixie Chicks "got a raw deal" from a disapproving public following their criticism of President Bush...

...Nelson said he was surprised his remarks about Bush a year earlier during an overseas news conference didn't incite a similar controversy.

"I said 'He's not from Texas and he ain't a cowboy, so let's stop trashin' Texans and cowboys.' It got a little chuckle, but I didn't get run out of the country," Nelson told the magazine.


If the Dixie Chicks had dicks they would never have been so ostracized, but in country music (and NASCAR) you just cannot have women assert themselves outside of relationship music, such as...

"I saw you Hangin' out at Hooters with a wet T-Shirt"
"Stop gagging me with your Dale Earnhart '#3' jacket"
"Isn't 14 babies enough for ya' Jim Bob?"
"If you're gonna hit me, at least put down the belt sander"


These are the touching songs that the Dixie Chick haters want to have them sing.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

They have learned from their greatest supporters

The 48-hour suspension of well, I guess, airplane attacks makes little military sense (unless, of course you just decided to fold until there's a cease-fire). As Billmon states:

All in all, looking at how the war has progressed so far, I would say the Olmert government has come down with a stunning case of the reverse Midas touch: everything it touches turns to shit.


Well, I'd like to point out that the Israeli's wouldn't be doing this for nearly three weeks without the diplomatic cover, and outright blessing of George W. Bush. And we already know that every policy initiative - most particularly wars - undertaken by Chimpy turns to merde.

So if Olmert is operating under the blessing of C-plus Augustus (and I'm definitely now grading on a curve) there is at least a debate about the cause.

Which makes this especially frightening:

[Israeli]Defense officials told the Post last week that they were receiving indications from the United States that the US would be interested in seeing Israel attack Syria.


Can't we just finish losing our own wars, rather than going all in on the whole middle east?

I definitely want these matters resolved as quickly and peacefully as possible because this is surely the time to start playing high-stakes poker with Bush & Cheney. These two would go all in an a mixed suit of 3,5,8,10, and a two-eyed Jack and the time to take 'em is before they spend all their money lawyerin' up.

BEEP! BEEP!

That's also the sound the van containing the men in the white coats makes as they come to finally put a XXXXL straight jacket on K-Lo.

So badly has the market for war cheerleaders been going that she makes a last desperate plea for her fellow war-whores that Mitt Romney would see around closing time at the Bill Buckley mixer.


Rolling Fiction [Kathryn Jean Lopez]

Powerline — along with Andy McCarthy & Mark Levin and others who care about truth — has got Michael Ledeen's back in the wake of the recent Rolling Stone attack on him.

Speaking of people who are fighting this war — God bless Ledeen.

Posted at 2:37 PM


Delightful News

It's been a bad week when comic relief is provided by Mel Gibson's anti-semitic diatribe.

But there is good news...aside from my car insurance...

Mike Nelson, that's the Mike Nelson, as opposed to Mike Nelson, has a new job, much like his old job. And it comes with video.


It makes me happy.

Did I mention that I cried?

Another success

For George W. Bush's "treat the world like a snowglobe" strategy. Encouraging the Isreali's to act against Hizbollah from the safety of using air power.

As almost always, throughout the last century, if that's the only real plan, it fails -- and fails spectacularly:

QANA, Lebanon (Reuters) - An Israeli air strike killed at least 40 Lebanese civilians, including 23 children, on Sunday, prompting Lebanon to tell U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice she was unwelcome in Beirut before a ceasefire.

Hundreds of protesters chanting "Death to Israel, Death to America" stormed the U.N. headquarters in Beirut, even though witnesses said Hizbollah officials tried to discourage them.

Rice, who plans to stay on in Israel, said she was deeply saddened by the air raid on the southern village of Qana, but stopped well short of calling for an immediate ceasefire.

It was the bloodiest single attack during Israel's 19-day-old war on Hizbollah guerrillas.


Fair or not (and in this case it is quite fair) Isreal's war crimes, be they sins of omission or commission are ours -- they are our surrogates at least as much as Hizbollah is claimed to be Irans by Clusterfuck McBunnypants.

Sentimental Abstractions

Nobody likes the old hit shows that are a couple years past their primes.

Frank Rich

The Iraqi people, whose collateral damage was so successfully hidden for so long by the Rumsfeld war plan, remain a sentimental abstraction to most Americans. Whether they are seen in agony after another Baghdad bombing or waving their inked fingers after an election or being used as props to frame Mrs. Bush during the State of the Union address, they have little more specificity than movie extras. Chalabi, Allawi, Jaafari, Maliki come and go, all graced with the same indistinguishable praise from the American president, all blurring into an endless loop of instability and crisis. We feel badly ... and change the channel.

Given that the violence in Iraq has only increased in the weeks since the elimination of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, the Jordanian terrorist portrayed by the White House as the fount of Iraqi troubles, any Americans still paying attention to the war must now confront the reality that the administration is desperately trying to hide. “The enemy in Iraq is a combination of rejectionists and Saddamists and terrorists,” President Bush said in December when branding Zarqawi Public Enemy No. 1. But Iraq’s exploding sectarian warfare cannot be pinned on Al Qaeda or Baathist dead-enders.

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Allow me to say: NO FUCKING WAY!!!

It is time for the people to scream and for the Democrats to call out the GOP-Police State.

THIS is too fucking much!


U.S. citizens suspected of terror ties might be detained indefinitely and barred from access to civilian courts under legislation proposed by the Bush administration, say legal experts reviewing an early version of the bill.

A 32-page draft measure is intended to authorize the
Pentagon's tribunal system, established shortly after the 2001 terrorist attacks to detain and prosecute detainees captured in the war on terror. The tribunal system was thrown out last month by the Supreme Court.

Administration officials, who declined to comment on the draft, said the proposal was still under discussion and no final decisions had been made.

Senior officials are expected to discuss a final proposal before the
Senate Armed Services Committee next Wednesday.


This is the work of a police state, something tinhorn dictators to absolutist tyrants would dream up -- and would allow all manner of abuse.

Stalin (and his fabulous breasts) could not have drafted up a better law.

Mel, Mel, Mel

Well, this is certainly most unpleasant, if true. An OWI is bad enough, but certainly not uncommon in the world. However, I guess he really is a chip off the old nazi.

According to the incident report obtained by TMZ.com, the Road Warrior embarked on a belligerent, anti-Semitic outburst when he realized he had been busted.

"F-----g Jews. The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world," Mee's report quotes him as saying.

"Are you a Jew?" Gibson asked the deputy, according to the report.

The actor also berated the deputy, threatening, "You motherf----r. I'm going to f--- you," according to Mee's report.

The actor also told the cop he "owns Malibu" and would spend all his money "to get even with me," Mee said in his report.

TMZ quoted a law enforcement source as saying Gibson noticed a female sergeant on the scene and yelled at her, "What do you think you're looking at, sugar t--s?"

Deputy Mee then wrote an eight-page report detailing of the incident, but higher-ups in the sheriff's department felt it was too "inflammatory" to release and would merely serve to incite "Jewish hatred," TMZ said.


It's amazing when the nicest thing in a police report is calling a female officer "Sugar Tits", I think we can rest assured that not even Hitler had done that one before.

The Weathervane

Chuck Hagel has been a far stronger critic of Bush than McCain has been, and at this point seems to be setting himself up in 2008 to be the "actual" straight-talker over McCain who has been busy selling his soul in a last desperate grope for the White House the last six months. It would be nice, however, if Hagel for once put his tough talk into action -- something he often does not do.

Calling conditions in Iraq "an absolute replay of Vietnam," Sen. Chuck Hagel said Friday that the Pentagon is making a mistake by beefing up American forces in Iraq.

U.S. soldiers have become "easy targets" in a country that has descended into "absolute anarchy," the Nebraska Republican and Vietnam combat veteran said in an interview with The World-Herald.

He said that in the previous 48 hours, he had received three telephone calls from four-star generals who were "beside themselves" over the Pentagon's reversal of plans to bring tens of thousands of soldiers home this fall.

Instead, top Pentagon officials are suspending military rotations and adding troops in Iraq. The Pentagon has estimated that the buildup will increase the number of U.S. troops from about 130,000 to 135,000.

"That isn't going to do any good. It's going to have a worse effect," Hagel said. "They're destroying the United States Army."


An additional note that should worry McCain (and then later the rest of us) is that Hagel should know a thing or two about how to "handle" those electronic voting machines.

Nothing to brag about

Joe Galloway, noted war correspondent, doesn't think much of the "new" new policy for placating Iraq:

The security forces of the new, weak Iraqi government vanish before the killing starts and reappear only after it's done — except for those who participate in the slaughter or facilitate it. Some of those come from the government's Shiite-dominated Interior Ministry.

A couple thousand more Americans on the streets of Baghdad won't contribute much, except to the number of Americans being killed and wounded there. But the places they left are going to miss them in the worst way.

Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld with his new way of war — high-tech weapons taking the place of soldiers on the ground — began this war with half the number of U.S. troops needed for the job and no plan to secure the peace.

It's the soldiers and Marines who are still there, many on their second or third combat tours, who continue to pay the price for poor leadership, half-baked tactics and no strategy worthy of the name.

Say a prayer for them tonight, and every night. That's more support than they'll get from the halls of power in Washington.

How shocking for the home of Falafel Boy

Pricks Chicks Nix Tits Mix

Fox News Channel is close to settling a sex discrimination suit filed by the Feds on behalf of four former female employees.

In a deal expected to be announced as soon as Monday, sources said Fox will pay a nominal sum -- less than $250,000 -- to the four women involved, but admits no wrongdoing.

Suit, filed by the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission in November, alleged Fox marketing veep Joe Chillemi sexually harassed freelance production assistant Kim Weiler and the other unnamed women "to a hostile work environment because of their sex."

The Feds accused Chillemi of using lewd language in the workplace -- expressions like "useless as tits on a bull" -- and that he described pregnant women's breasts as "fucking huge," "cannons" and "melons."

Class

Why will Letterman be regarded as a broadcasting legend, while Jay Leno will always be in Carson's shadow?

Because Jay Leno (and shit, the rest of the NBC networks) will have dumbass Coulter on to spew the most crazed bullshit possible, driving discourse into the toilet - while Letterman will simply point out the obvious in the most direct way possible.

For example.

Time Lines

November 8, 1942: Americans invade French North Africa, beginning their first direct combat against Axis troops.

May 8, 1945: Germany unilaterally surrenders.

Time: Two years, six months.



March 20, 2003: U.S. Invades Iraq

July 29, 2006: Still there, situation worse than ever.

Time: Three years, 4 months, two weeks.


Just sayin'

Friday, July 28, 2006

Braindead

It's not a joke, it's reality. Thanks to Josh Marshall here is the video of Bush's partly incoherent, partly fictional, partly fascist, fully rambling answer -- full of tired false cliches. It's not really funny, it is just sad -- for all of us.

While 3,500 American troops had their 1 year stay in Iraq, extended another 4 months

The "War Preznit" was...deciding to have a photo op.

REUTERS/Jason Reed

Fucktard

Well, I lost whatever small piece of respect I may have been able to find for his Chimperial Highness in today's just concluded press conference.

Asked by David Gregory how, having promised a new day in the Middle East if we invaded Iraq, he can justify his policies their failure being so apparent.

Bush's answer revealed previously unplummed levels of "non" depth. In essense, "The terrorist want to do stuff to make things look bad, and they are not all that bad, but they do them so as to get people to question my policies."

In other words, anyone who disagrees with my policies, is just tool of Al Qaeda, Hezbullah, the whole thing.

Nice.

That is the leader of a so-called free people.

When the trascript is up, I'll revisit this thing but it was quite reprehensible and stupid.

Thanks to P. O'Neill here is the transcript portion I was referring to:

David Gregory: ... Mr. President, three years ago, you argued that an invasion of Iraq would create a new stage of Arab-Israeli peace. And yet today there is an Iraqi prime minister who has been sharply critical of Israel.

Arab governments, despite your arguments, who first criticized Hezbollah, have now changed their tune. Now they're sharply critical of Israel.

And despite from both of you warnings to Syria and Iran to back off support from Hezbollah, effectively, Mr. President, your words are being ignored.

QUESTION: So what has happened to America's clout in this region that you've committed yourself to transform?


BUSH: ...They just got a different tool to use than we do: They kill innocent lives to achieve objectives. That's what they do. And they're good. They get on the TV screens and they get people to ask questions about, well, you know, this, that or the other. I mean, they're able to kind of say to people: Don't come and bother us, because we will kill you.

And my attitude is that now's the time to be firm. And we've got a great weapon on our side, and that is freedom and liberty. And it's got -- those two concepts have got the capacity to defeat ideologies of hate.



When you ask questions about the world, it's state, or Bush's policy, you are just a dupe of the terrorists.

Unless, of course, you are not a terrorist yourself.

That's "freedom & liberty" in these United States for ya' straight from the Horses-ass's mouth.

This just in from Hell

Dr. Dean;

I too object to being compared to Kathryn Harris.

Mine were real, and spectacular. Ask Von Ribbentropp. Here's a picture of him and me that was published in Tass back in late August 1939.

It was the best wet T-Shirt contest ever.

I beat out Beria and Malenkov and they had some fine breasts.

Sincerely,

Joseph Fuckyouavitch Stalin

While Bush enjoys pretending he's Taylor Hicks

The Atrocities (or as Victor Davis Hanson calls them, "victories") are further verified:

Just before leaving, the soldiers had been given an order to “kill all military-age men” at the site by a colonel and a captain, said Paul Bergrin and Michael Waddington, the lawyers who are disputing Sergeant Lemus’s account. Military officials in Baghdad have declined to comment on whether such an order, which would have been a violation of the law of war, might have been given.

The colonel, Michael Steele, is the brigade commander. He led the 1993 mission in Somalia made famous by the book and movie “Black Hawk Down.”

The two lawyers say Colonel Steele has indicated that he will not testify at the Article 32 hearing — the military equivalent of a grand jury hearing — or answer any questions about the case. Calls and e-mail messages to a civilian lawyer said to be representing Colonel Steele were not returned.

It is very rare for any commanding officer to refuse to testify at any stage of a court-martial proceeding, said Gary D. Solis, a former military judge and prosecutor who teaches the law of war at Georgetown University.


We know damn well why he isn't talking.

It must be about time for O'Reilly to start stickin' up for the SS again.

E-N-A-B-L-E-R

Young Petey Beinart, footloose and fancy free and of prime military age returns to his course as our youngest noble, if that is what you would call Lord Haw Haw Jr.:

After years of struggling to define their own approach to post-Sept. 11 foreign policy, Democrats seem finally to have hit on one. It's called pandering. In those rare cases when George W. Bush shows genuine sensitivity to America's allies and propounds a broader, more enlightened view of the national interest, Democrats will make him pay. It's jingoism with a liberal face.


Ah, yes, Petey. Back to the area he feels comfortable with: no real world experience; declared for some reason a pundit from a tender age - the last of the pre-blog world; unable to win a debate against individuals with the verbal dexterity of lawn mulch; for some reason keeps getting paying gigs as Joe Lieberman with fresh pubes.

Now, it's true that Mr. Maliki couldn't exactly come out and denounce Hezbollah. However, after $400 billion (and more coming); 20,000 casualties, and all else, you think Mr. Maliki could do a little better than have as his bottom line...

"Goddamned Jews"


That is what the criticism is Petey-boy, that all this money, all this blood, all this disaster, hasn't led to a middle east that is any better -- but worst then it ever was.

EXACTLY, the opposite of what all the pie-in-the-sky bomb droppers like George Bush, Dick Cheney, and let's see, oh yes, Peter Beinart, were saying back in the Spring of 2003.

While all those so-called panderers like Howard Dean were opposing the launch of the Clusterfuck formerly known as Iraq, what was brave, brave, prime fightin' age Beinart doing?

Oh, yes, decrying people like Howard Dean who were opposed to the invasion of Iraq as being not just a mistake but counterproductive to fighting terrorism. Guess who turned out to be right Petey?

Somebody forgot to tell him it isn't short for ...

Vietnam.

(AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite)

This is.

The Bitter with the Sweet

The Sweet:

Bush will be in a bunch of pictures looking like a doofus with American Idol contestants (sucking up to Rupert) while the middle east continues to explode...From the man who posed with a guitar while New Orleans drowned and whose Secretary of State just played the piano.


The Bitter:

Bush is President, the underlying depressing subtext of the last five years, six months, and eight days.

And it should go without saying...and believe me on CNN, MSNBC, FoxNews, CBS, ABC, NBC, and PBS it will...that while Bush has these folks at the White House and poses for photo ops, his Administration has ordered 3,500 kids who have already spent a year in the hell-hole he's helped fashion and were about to come home to their families, to stay there for another four months.

Many of them won't stay that long though. They'll come home armless, legless, or in a unphotographed coffin covered by an American Flag.

But at least their families can take comfort in Clusterfuck McBunnypant's photo op!

The Derb is upset it isn't Emma Watson!

Disturbing Fan Fiction comes to life!

Naked role for Harry Potter star

Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe will strip off for his London stage debut as a psychologically disturbed stable boy in "Equus".


I sure hope he can top the riveting 1965 summer stock performance of George W. Bush. A performance he has never really let go.

Opposite Terms

Dear Washington Post:

Maybe, just maybe, you might consider this premise:

THEY SUCK!

In a second term marked by one setback after another, the White House was in the midst of a rebuilding effort aimed at a political comeback before November's critical midterm elections. Now the president faces the challenge of responding to events that seem to be spinning out of control again, all but sidelining his domestic agenda for the moment and complicating his effort to rally the world to stop nuclear programs in Iran and North Korea.


In what "crisis" has the Bush Administration's chosen policy actually worked?

Seriously, name one fucking area it worked?

It didn't get Bin Laden.
It hasn't molified Afghanistan
It hasn't worked, certainly, in Iraq, no matter how many times they've proclaimed victory.
It sure didn't prevent, nor ameliorate, worsening the disaster in New Orleans.
It hasn't worked with North Korean
It hasn't worked between INdia and Pakistan.

Bush's typical policy initiative seems to be that whatever a past policy has been, if he does the opposite thing it will be better.

Only to discover that there was a reason both Republican and Democratic predecessors followed those policies -- because while at the margins bad things happen, occasionally very bad things, it contained the situation to the United States overall advantage.

Now look at the world.

Good fucking job chief.

My Condelences to NTodd

This seems to happen to them every season that Art Model doesn't move them out of town.

Last year it was Kellen Winslow, this year it is their best free agent signing.

Browns' Bentley done for season with knee injury


Well, at least I linked to him.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Now I Get It

Bush keeps talking about the prospect of a cease fire in a way that made no sense to me, in essence telling the Israel to keep bombing the shit out of Lebanon until Hesbollah says "uncle" and is ready to make nice. He wants a "sustainable peace", therefore, no cease fire until the peace is, well, sustainable. It just hasn't made sense to me.

To figure it out you have to start thinking like Bush. It's kind of like the look he has on his face when someone tells him that if he shoves food up his rectum that he can poop out of his mouth. He thinks about it real hard, then asks Condi if it is true. See, they aren't spelling it out for him so he thinks all that is required is a:

SUSTAINABLE PIECE.

Someone, please get the chimp his sustainable piece so that we all can have some ourselves.

The Douchebag Suite

While the Middle East burns, yet again, a pivotal Bush Administration figure is seen doing a Nero routine.

(AP Photo)

What could make this more appropriate?

Oh yes:

Well, that's no cave...


It looks more like the set of 'Iron Chef'

Have they added a 'Middle Eastern' dude?

Operative Enduring Redundancy

The "NEW" spectacular, stupendous, awesome, dynamic, factesque of what Bush would like to call 'the ground', super-duper, marvelous, stunning, we're winning, fabulous, let's call it awesome again, plan for getting control of Baghdad ("Operation Enduring Awesomeness!?") has been revealed in time for the new Fall Cable News Network season. And it's truly awesomely uninspiring.

...just six weeks ago, there was a much-balleyhooed "Baghdad Offensive," which reportedly involved 75,000 Iraqi and Coalition troops. It was supposed to retake the city, and military leaders and pundits predicted that the insurgents would be routed and order restored. So obviously that didn't exactly go according to plan. And more to the point, if 75,000 couldn't do it, how are an extra 8,000 going to make a difference? Or maybe, just maybe, this announcement is, dare I say, politically motivated? Because six weeks ago, President Bush was making a Surprise Visit to Baghdad, at which he and Prime Minister Maliki announced the massive Baghdad operation. Now Prime Minister Maliki is visiting to the U.S. and there's a new plan to secure Baghdad. Well, I'm sure it's just a coincidence.


But hell, let's just go to the reviews:

B. O'Reilly, FoxNews: "I laugh, I cried, I stayed 6,000 miles away"

S. Doocey, FoxNews: "I had a boner, five minutes later I didn't. Then I got a boner again."

L. Dobbs, CNN: "Will it protect me from the Mexi-India-Chinaman?"

S. Hannity, FoxNews: "Colmes, time to wipe me!"

P. Zahn, CNN: "Is this the sign from Revelations?"

A. Coulter, MSNBC: "It's not at all gay, like Bill Clinton gay."

D. Cheney, Halliburton Syndicate: "Mwa fwa muffa ma mwa"

Your Cable News Network Summary

FOXNEWS: Your GOP Talking Point & thensome network.

8 p.m. Eastern: The O'Reilly Factor: Bill interviews Michael Ledeen about what some emailer in Jerusalem
sent him about what is going on in Iranistan. Why the Democrats won't let the President win the war on terror through nuclear weapons, which every christian patriot knows Jesus loves more than the after-life itself.

9 p.m. Eastern: Hannity & Colmes: Hannity interviews Rich Lowry about how we are sure to win in Baghdad this time, gahrrrr-oooooohn-teeeeeeed.

10 p.m. Eastern: Greta: Greta interviews a psychic for Andrea Yates' childrens reaction to their mothers not guilty by reason of insanity defense, and Fox Judge Anthony Napolitano tells Fox viewers how they can use the insanity defense for their advantage in the future.

MSNBC: Your Ann Coulter enabling network.

7 p.m. Eastern: Hardball: Ann Coulter gives her wacky, off the wall statements on the events of the day.

8 p.m. Eastern
: Countdown with Keith Olbermann: Taking on Ann Coulter's vile statements as they come.

9 p.m. Eastern: Scarborough Country: Guest host Rita Crosby and Ann Coulter talk about their days working as Longshoreman and their favorite copulating animals.

10 p.m. Eastern: Lockdown, Prison Bitches: Special Guest Ann Coulter discusses the joy of conjugal visit sodomy.

CNN: Your RAPTURE network.

7 p.m. Eastern: The Situation Room: Wolf asks whether the end times will deter AIPAC from achieving it's aims while Jack Cafferty decries Jesus leaving cranky old men behind.

8 p.m. Eastern: Paula Zahn: Author Tim LaHaye visits to answer the question whether we are at the end times and if Jesus will allow blonde talking heads to ascend into heaven first. Then see Paula flash the savior gash.

9 p.m. Eastern: Larry King's guests wonder who the hell you have to marry to get raptured? Then Regis Philbin stops by to make a special pleading that Kathie Lee and Frank get left behind, as well as their little brats. Reege also sacrifices Kelly by burying her alive in bad reviews for 'Hope & Faith'.

10 p.m. Eastern: Anderson Cooper's Head does a 360: Anderson asks special guest St. Peter if homosexuality will still get him into heaven as long as he dresses well, but not too well -- "if you know what I mean".

First,

I'd like to start out with a little medley, I just wrote concerning my thoughts on the day so far.

Fuck you blogger,
Yeah, Blogger, hey, fuck you!

Here's a large branch blogger,
Bend over it'll be funny
When I stick it up yo' bunny
Again and Again, and agaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiin!

So Let me tell you, it's true
When I say fuck you blogger,
I'm talking 'bout youuuuuuuuuuu!


Thanks, you've been a lovely audience.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

If you ever read this blog



I shouldn't even have to crack a joke at this point, you already know what it is.

(AFP/Tiziana Fabi)

Another Opportunity...

For a failed leadership moment for the Bush administration. Isn't it about time for some lackey to show their pretty face on teleevision and tell us that this yet another chance for the chimp to show his mucho fabuloso skills as El Presidente?

Me, I'm waiting for some rapturist to tell me the bible really does say that it is right around the corner when the moron king ascends to the throne and encourages war in the holy land; that Jesus H. Christ is ridin' his chariot from the heavens to smite the heathens.

The Vapaaaaahhhss

(To the tune of "Turning Japanese")


I've got your picture of me and you

You wrote "I love you" I love you too

Hizbollah's a shootin' and Ariel is turnin' blue

Oops it's in color the media's in play
Your polls free fallin, and Iraq is quite screwed
You'll really owe me but here I go to see what I can do


I've got your picture, I've got your picture
I'd like a million of them all round my cell

I asked the doctor to let you go apeshit

So I will unleash to you the mustache ride from hell

You've got our minds off of the shit that's going down
And the press is turning all around

Bomb the Lebanese, I Think I'll bomb the Lebanese I really think so
Bomb the Lebanese, I'm gonna bomb the Lebanese I really think so



I've got your picture, I've got your picture
I'd like a million of them all round my cell
I asked the doctor to let you go apeshit
So I can look at you from inside as well

You've got our minds off of the shit that's going down
And the press is turning all around
and turning in and turning 'round



Bomb the Lebanese, I Think I'll bomb the Lebanese I really think so
Bomb the Lebanese, I'm gonna bomb the Lebanese I really think so



No war, no death, no rape, no killin'
No fun, no sin, no you, no wonder it's dark

Everyone around me is a total stranger
Everyone avoids me like a psyched lone-ranger Everyone

Bomb the Lebanese, I Think I'll bomb the Lebanese I really think so
Bomb the Lebanese, I'm gonna bomb the Lebanese I really think so


Bomb the Lebanese, I Think I'll bomb the Lebanese I really think so
Bomb the Lebanese, I'm gonna bomb the Lebanese I really think so

Dueling Morons



Tbogg has the summary.


To be fair, the kid in 'Deliverance' at least had a skill.

I know it's like Masturbation

But as the Right Wing exercises all their "black helicopter" scenarios in condeming Kofi Anan for daring to accuse the 51st State of wrongdoing, let's go to the record as far as the UN is concerned:

The U.N. observers killed when an Israeli bomb made a direct hit on their bunker in southern Lebanon Tuesday called an Israeli military liaison about 10 times in the six hours before they died to warn that the aerial attacks were getting close to their position, according to a U.N. officer.

After each call, the Israeli officer promised to have the bombing stopped, an officer at the U.N. Interim Force in Lebanon (UNIFIL) base in Noqoura said.


Finally, an Israeli bomb exploded directly on the U.N. post near Khiyam, killing four U.N. observers from Austria, Finland, Canada and China, the U.N. officer said.

As of Wednesday morning, three of the four bodies had been recovered from the rubble, an officer at the U.N. Interim Force in Lebanon (UNIFIL) base in Noqoura said.


So when Anan says that this apparently looked deliberate, he has justified cause for saying so.

If Hezbollah, or any of those non-rapture worthy peoples had done something similar they'd be calling for Iran's Members Only Jacket Wearing Crazy Man to be shot into the Sun...

...well, more loudly than usual.


And as for the Israeli's not being capable of engaging in war crimes, do the words Sabra & Shatila ring a bell?

And it's prime enabler was, after a period of shame, made Prime Minister.

So don't tell me they aren't capable.

Hezbollah is full of bastards, that doesn't mean Israel is bereft of them.

Seems like I've heard this before

From World Nut Daily, tragically ignored by the Pulitzer Prize board year-after-year.

Are Israel's troubles in the Gaza Strip and Lebanon and the Hezbollah rockets slamming daily into major Israeli population centers here a result of the Jewish state's tacit support for a homosexual parade slated for next month in Jerusalem?

Some rabbis seem to think so, and they are attempting to block the event from taking place in Judaism's holiest city.

"Why does this war break out this week, all of sudden with little warning? Because this is the exact week the Jewish people are trying to decide whether the gay pride parade should take place in Jerusalem or Tel Aviv," Pinchas Winston, a noted author, rabbi and lecturer based in Jerusalem told WND.


I love the old World Nut Daily subtle gravitas - Pinchas Winston isn't referred to as the appropo "obvious dumbass", no, he's a "noted author".

Once again, the attempt to blame this on the gays, ignores the fact that the supposed protagonist is not exactly the cast of "Torchsong Trilogy" (unless Israel has invaded the land of Roy Cohn clones, which frankly seems even more bizarre).

Look the only thing the leadership of Hezbollah has in common with many gay men is they both have beards.

"Your girlfriend isn't insane enough!"

But I thought they wanted her to be President some day?

Conservative national security allies of President Bush are in revolt against Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, saying that she is incompetent and has reversed the administration’s national security and foreign policy agenda.

The conservatives, who include Newt Gingrich, Richard Perle and leading current and former members of the Pentagon and National Security Council, have urged the president to transfer Miss Rice out of the State Department and to an advisory role. They said Miss Rice, stemming from her lack of understanding of the Middle East, has misled the president on Iran and the Arab-Israeli conflict.

"The president has yet to understand that people make policy and not the other way around," a senior national security policy analyst said. "Unlike [former Secretary of State Colin] Powell, Condi is loyal to the president. She is just incompetent on most foreign policy issues."

The criticism of Miss Rice has been intense and comes from a range of Republican loyalists, including current and former aides in the Defense Department and the office of Vice President Dick Cheney. They have warned that Iran has been exploiting Miss Rice's inexperience and incompetence to accelerate its nuclear weapons program. They expect a collapse of her policy over the next few months.


It is getting so confusing to follow the direction of the pointed fingers coming from the Right-Wing as they avoid the "elephant" in their room - the fact that their whole policy idea was, and remains, insane. Now that their "GOD" isn't delivering them the righteous victory they believed they were entitled to, there must have been a "ye of little faith" within the cult. Eventually, of course, they'll get around to those of us who said this would happen if they pursued their insanity because we never believed.

The only defense I've ever been able to come up with for Rice is that she is slightly less incompetent and evil than the camp that is now going after her.

And if that isn't damning with the faintest of praise, I don't know what is.

The coming war plan

For the IDF:

Wednesday: Capture Bint Jbeil, bomb South Beirut Rubble
Thursday: Destroy key missile launch site, bomb South Beirut Rubble
Friday: Capture Bint Jbeil, bomb South Beirut Rubble
Saturday: Destroy key missile site, bomb South Beirut Rubble
Sunday: Capture Bint Jbeil, bomb South Beirut Rubble



For Hezbollah:

Wednesday: Show rubble, launch missiles
Thursday: Re-take Bint Jbeil, lauch missiles
Friday: Show rubble, launch missiles
Saturday: Re-take Bint Jbeil, launch missiles
Sunday: Show rubble, launch missiles

Oh, Senator Bayh

As many progressive bloggers have pointed out, on May 22 you stated this:

Bayh said if the Iraqi factions “get their political act together — and we will know this in the next six to eight weeks… if they can form a government… then there’s something to work with there.” If not, then “we’re out.”


I have looked upon my calendar and it has been more than 9 weeks.

What say you now?

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

"And then I got to carve the pig"



It just gets better and better.

(AFP/File/Ahmad Al-Rubaye)


BTW, what the fuck is that outside the window, giant sheets of bacon?

"Um, do you folks really need to photograph this?"


"I want to liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive"

(AFP/Mandel Ngan)



Maliki, really enjoying his trip so far.

The Jomentum of the Market Place

Will really be behind this earnestly needed product, endorsed by none other than Connecticut's least popular Senator.

They Give Good Seminar

As the lawyer on the blog that did not get asked to cross post on Patriotboy, Atrios, Firedoglake, (am I missing any brother Attaturk?) I want to take this moment to make yet another PSA.

Tristero linked to a report of the American Bar Association that takes strong issue with preznitial signing statements, among other things. Actually, it was all over the news yesterday. Proof that even the ABA gets something right on occasion. Note, I'm not saying lawyers because I still believe in the quaint notion that many of us are the thin blue line, people like Thurgood Marshall, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Alberto Mora, Patrick Fitzgerald, Ralph Nader, Morris Dees, heck, I'll even give you two you wouldn't expect but who are doing their heritage proud: Bruce Fein (did he say Bruce Fein?), and John Dean, just to name a few who were or are willing to stand for something. Are any of these people enough to balance the likes of John Yoo and David Addington? There are times I fear not.

What's the point? The ABA also rated as well qualified Justices Roberts and Alito. I say qualified schmalified, if they take away rights, what's the difference? At least the ABA gives good seminar.

"Oh Look"


"It's Ted Stevens' internets"

(AFP/File/Tim Sloan)

Men of Planet Earth...(especially Americans)

As Roger Ailes says, the world does not really need anymore reasons to consider you a lazy, capitalist pig with a small, small penis.

Your corpulence, must be moderated by some sense of logical thought.

A 103-inch Plasma Screen is selling for $70,000.


We need some of that money for "smart" bombs and bunker busters.

Besides, your penis is only slightly smaller than average, and this 55-inch is available for $4,299.

Or better yet, become a lawyer, or other professional like me Atta (the "J" is for "just right") Turk and buy yourself a projector, which you use for "professional" stuff and then occasionally take it home and project on an 80-inch screen for just over a grand. It's a lot easier to write it off, I might add, then a big-ass TV.

You and your penis will congratulate each other. Unless you accidentally tune in to Rita Cosby. Then you may not speak for a few days.

"Paper, Pay-pur, P-A-P-E-R"


REUTERS/Jason Reed

Do yourself a favor

And get yourself a bottle of gin...

Then read this.

Truth off the mfing record

So, who is it?

The candidate, immersed in one of the most competitive Senate races in the country, sat down to lunch yesterday with reporters at a Capitol Hill steakhouse and shared his views about this year's political currents.

On the Iraq war: "It didn't work. . . . We didn't prepare for the peace."

A GOP Senate candidate expressed dissent, loudly if anonymously, with the White House, pointing to President Bush's post-Sept. 11 pose with a firefighter and his post-Katrina flyovers as signs of a "disconnect." (By Doug Mills -- Associated Press)

On the response to Hurricane Katrina: "A monumental failure of government."

On the national mood: "There's a palpable frustration right now in the country."

It's all fairly standard Democratic boilerplate -- except the candidate is a Republican ...

..."In 2001, we were attacked and the president is on the ground, on a mound with his arm around the fireman, symbol of America," he said, between bites of hanger steak and risotto. "In Katrina, the president is at 30,000 feet in an airplane looking down at people dying, living on a bridge. And that disconnect, I think, sums up, for me at least, the frustration that Americans feel."

The response to Katrina was "a monumental failure," he continued. "We became so powerful in our ivory towers, in our gated communities. We forgot that there are poor people." The detachment remained after the storm, he said. "I could see that they weren't getting it, they weren't necessarily clued in. . . . For me, the seminal moment was the [Dubai] port decision."


If this shit keeps up, around Labor Day they'll all come out in public.

And I mean "come out" literally.

Monday, July 24, 2006

It's Been a week

(More or Less)

No You Tube battle, just "teh funny".

SCTV's "Leave it to Beaver, 25th Anniversary Special"

We're number 6,552!

Wahoo!!!

Where are our book deals?

Where are our deranged minions?

Where is our bizarre subordinate fixated with our sexy, sexy hands?

Where are our eclairs!?

All a titter

Why is it a "surprise" when a Bush official pops down for a meaningless cameo?

Here's my prediction, sometime before she returns to Washington Condi will drop from the sky and pronounce the Baghdad Green Zone "fabulous!", before making an additional trip to "fantastic" Kabul. The only surprise will be if she does not do either of those things.


Oh, Rice & Bolton together -- that's pretty much a "charisma" event horizon.

REUTERS/Frank Franklin/Pool

Ah, those Secular Humanists

The Bush Administration is causing the Iraqi divorce rate to explode (sorry, poor choice of words).

What is unreported is that the Iraqis are killing embryonic stem cells willy-nilly. Shiite microbiologists and Sunni microbiologist are unplugging freezers all throughout the country. While in the north, the Kurds are marketing "Frozen Turkish Baby" flavored slurpees.

Shorter Arlen Specter

The Bush Administration's electronic surveillance program has been a flagrant violation of the law and the only solution we have is to let him get away with it.

Things that must go away

- Hand fetishists as Chief of Staff
- Illegal Alien Blastocysts
- Sean Hannity Enablers
- Ann Coulter publishers
- YOU TUBE blog battles!
- Cable pokers shows
- Rush Limbaugh's erectile disfunction stories
- Hummer commercials dealing with an automobile
- Dick Cheney's colostomy bag
- Dick Cheney's wife (sorry to be redundant)
- Tucker Carlson


But mostly the You Tube blog battles.

It never really ends

If the Bush Administration cow-towed to wealthy people anymore Bush he'd have to start being there for the "happy endings".

The Bush administration plans to cut nearly in half the number of auditors who review tax returns of some of the wealthiest U.S. taxpayers.

Plans call for eliminating 157 of the Internal Revenue Service's 345 estate tax lawyers, The New York Times reported. The cuts will affect audits of taxpayers who are subject to gift and estate taxes when they transfer assets to their children and others, the newspaper said.

IRS Deputy Commissioner Kevin Brown told the Times he ordered the staff cuts because the number of Americans who are subject to the estate tax has fallen under the Bush administration.

However, six IRS estate tax lawyers whose jobs are at risk told the newspaper the cuts are part of a behind-the-scenes move at the IRS to shield people with political connections and complex tax-avoidance devices from thorough audits.

IRS estate tax lawyer Sharyn Phillips said the cuts were a "back-door way for the Bush administration to achieve what it cannot get from Congress, which is repeal of the estate tax."


"Back-door way", how appropriate.

Another Legacy from our Chimperial Lowness

I hope you all like mangos, because we sure are paying a high price for them:

Pakistan has begun building what independent analysts say is a powerful new reactor for producing plutonium, a move that, if verified, would signal a major expansion of the country's nuclear weapons capabilities and a potential new escalation in the region's arms race...

"South Asia may be heading for a nuclear arms race that could lead to arsenals growing into the hundreds of nuclear weapons, or at minimum, vastly expanded stockpiles of military fissile material," the institute's David Albright and Paul Brannan concluded in the technical assessment, a copy of which was provided to The Washington Post...

Pakistan, like India, has never signed the nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty. One of its pioneering nuclear scientists, Abdul Qadeer Khan, who confessed two years ago to operating a network that supplied nuclear materials and know-how to Libya, Iran and North Korea.

The evidence of a possible escalation also comes as Congress prepares to debate a controversial nuclear cooperation agreement between the Bush administration and India. The agreement would grant India access to sensitive U.S. nuclear technology in return for placing its civilian nuclear reactors under tighter safeguards.

No such restrictions were placed on India's military nuclear facilities. India currently has an estimated 30 to 35 nuclear warheads based on a sophisticated plutonium design. Pakistan, which uses a simpler, uranium-based warhead design, has sought for years to modernize its arsenal, and a new heavy-water reactor could allow it to do so, weapons experts say.


Once again, far seeing policy victories for Clusterfuck McBunnypants.

Suddenly it's "Urgent"

July 24:

The US Secretary of State, Condoleezza Rice, has said there is an urgent need for a ceasefire in Lebanon.

However, Dr Rice, who is heading to the region for talks, said that any deal must address the root cause of the conflict between Israel and Hezbollah.


July 22:

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, embarking on a diplomatic mission to the troubled Middle East, said she would work for ``stability and lasting peace'' instead of the immediate cease-fire demanded by much of the rest of the world.

A cease-fire between Israel and Hezbollah guerrillas in Lebanon would be a ``false promise'' if the root causes of the conflict are not addressed, the top U.S. diplomat said.


What the Sam Hill done changed?

Another "cakewalk" down the tubes apparently.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

The FUTURE

AMERICA HELD HOSTAGE, DAY 24, February 13, 2007

(AP) Tehran,

The Iranian government today announced that unless the United States immediately agreed to withdraw from Iraq as well as forward a 12-pak of Mountain Dew it would begin the capital trial of 1,213 blastocyst it holds hostage in an impounded "Good Humor" truck.

The Bush Administration stated it would not negotiate with a terrorist state threatening cold blooded defrosting.

Today on a very special "Meet the Press"


As guest Josh Bolton will see it.

Before he gets back home for a happy ending.

Oh, Keith you rascal!


(AP Photo/Reed Saxon)

Olbermann dons O'Reilly mask at TV meeting

"We thought we'd help you out, those of you who needed a good photograph of," Olbermann said, pausing to hold up O'Reilly's photo glued to a stick as reporters laughed.

Olbermann has named O'Reilly his "Worst Person in the World" at least 15 times. The nightly "award" is Olbermann's way of criticizing bad behavior.

"It's just so much fun," Olbermann said. "I've always liked playing in traffic. I was told in 1977 that I had no future in the business and wouldn't last if I didn't change my style, so I don't really worry about it."

The Hell that has disappeared

That place our national media broadcasters don't talk about any more.

Still progressing:
More than 50 people have died in two separate car bomb attacks in Iraq.

At least 34 of them were killed when a bomb exploded at a crowded market in Sadr City - a mainly Shia area in the Iraqi capital.

A few hours later at least 20 people died in a blast near a courthouse in the northern city of Kirkuk.


Naturally, the Sadr City explosion came just after U.S. & the Washington Generals (aka Iraqi Government forces) completed a security sweep of the area.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Now that's some serious Jomentum

Lieberman is now losing by double digits in the the primary election and polling has him deadlocked with Lamont in the general election.

Lieberman's numbers are NOT going up if he loses the primary substantially.

It's a good thing I live on the second floor

Because when I see this it would be very tempting to jump off of anything higher.

Incredibly powerful and very disturbing (and graphic).

Refuse to be exploited

As I said a few days ago, ESPN, occasional home to hot dog eating championships, spelling bees, and Sean Salisbury, is actually practicing what used to be called journalism.

The conclusion of their three-part investigation of Pat Tillman shows a family that refused to let the U.S. government turn their son into something that he wasn't. It takes great bravery to choose the truth over having your son be an icon. There is little more disgusting than the exploitation of Tillman's death...

...except of course the fact that he is one of the tens of thousands of needless deaths that have occurred because of the Bush Administration.

READ IT!

One gets the feeling,

That if the news media ever remembers Iraq again, they will not mention that it has fundementally changed to from a probable civil war to Baghdad becoming the worst place on earth. More people die in Baghdad each day, than die at what has been the worst of the current Israel/Hezbollah/Lebanon conflict.

Yet, despite the worsening (ever worsening) situation the media has abandoned the death-throws (the real final throes) of the American experiment, the horrendously failed American experiment, that is Iraq.

One wonders if they are even going to pay attention to the dog-and-pony show that will be the visit of Al-Maliki this week. For Al-Maliki's speech before Congress will be the emptiest celebration of non-achievement and non-success since Ford came there to announce the "WIN" button.

The deterioration continues to pick up speed:

Invoking the sanctity of human life, George Bush wielded the presidential veto for the first time in his presidency to halt US embryonic stem cell research in its tracks. He even paraded one-year-old Jack Jones, born from one of the frozen embryos that can now never be used for federally funded research, and talked of preventing the "taking of innocent human life". How hollow that sounds to Iraqis.

More people are dying here - probably more than 150 a day - in the escalating sectarian civil war between Shia and Sunni Muslims and the continuing war with US troops than in the bombardment of Lebanon...

...I never expected the occupation of Iraq by the US and Britain to end happily. But I did not foresee the present catastrophe. Baghdad has survived the Iran-Iraq war, the 1991 Gulf War, UN sanctions, more bombing and, finally, a savage guerrilla war. Now the city is finally splitting apart, and - most surprising of all - this disaster scarcely gets a mention on the news as the world watches the destruction of Beirut so many miles away.

Priorities

Iraq blowing apart, Israel about to invade Lebanon...but

Top 10 'American Idol' Finalists Invited to Meet the President

Friday, July 21, 2006

Clusterfuck

You need no reminder that Bush just denied allowing funding of research on embryonic stem cells...because it's murder.

Four U.S. soldiers accused of murdering suspected insurgents during a raid in Iraq said they were under orders to "kill all military age males," according to sworn statements obtained by The Associated Press.

The soldiers first took some of the men into custody because they were using two women and a toddler as human shields. They shot three of the men after the women and child were safe and say the men attacked them.

"The ROE (rule of engagement) was to kill all military age males on Objective Murray," Staff Sgt. Raymond L. Girouard told investigators, referring to the target by its code name.


What fantastic leadership we have. Billmon linked to this, and I agree with the sentiments of Cenk Uygur:

In the old empires, there would be a lot of marriages between the royal families. And from time to time, these inter-family marriages would produce a mentally challenged son who would inherit the throne. This would set the empire back for hundreds of years. I'm not saying anything, I'm just saying. Russia is big and so is China.

That thing I don't write much about

I haven't added much to the debate about Joe Lieberman (I support Lamont of course). But Dan Froomkin mentions something today:

Reuters reports: "President George W. Bush is considering a new effort to have John Bolton confirmed as the U.S. ambassador to the United Nations, a year after appointing him to the job over Senate objections, aides said on Thursday. . . .


Fresh off of saying that a dead Lebanese child isn't as tragic as a dead Israeli child -- in the wake of so many other non-diplomatic non-triumphs -- one might ask:

"Senator Lieberman, would you support Bolton's nomination to the UN?

Yes,

or

No?

Shhhhh, the President might hear about this...

Ugh!

The situation has gotten even darker since my initial story—a United Nations report cited in Wednesday's New York Times found that an average of more than 100 Iraqi civilians were killed each day in June—and I've learned from two sources that some senior figures at the CIA, along with a number of Iraq analysts, have been pushing to produce a new NIE. They've been stonewalled, however, by John Negroponte, the administration's Director of National Intelligence, who knows that any honest take on the situation would produce an NIE even more pessimistic than the 2004 version. That could create problems on the Hill and, if it is leaked as the last one was, with the public as well.

“What do you call the situation in Iraq right now?” asked one person familiar with the situation. “The analysts know that it's a civil war, but there's a feeling at the top that [using that term] will complicate matters.” Negroponte, said another source regarding the potential impact of a pessimistic assessment, “doesn't want the president to have to deal with that.”


Nicolas II and Alexandria were "reality-based" compared to George & Laura. At least they only had ONE Rasputin.

For Future reference

Those of you who will have the meat puppet also known as the President of the United States invading your personal space over the next two and one half years (give or take impeachment) will need the following preventative measures on hand.


Pepper Spray and/or rape whistle


A face mask


A Hat, and/or toupee


A Rain Coat



For further information please contact, via mail along with an enclosed personal check for $25 (or if a minor, a photograph), the Department of Homeland Security.

The Shit Offensive

I feel hungover -- and I didn't even earn it -- so this story of Iraq fits in with my mood.

First, the Bush version:

Energy Secretary Sammy "What, You haven't heard of me?" Bodman:

“The situation seems far more stable than when I was here two or three years ago,” he said in an interview in the fortified Green Zone. “The security seems better, people are more relaxed. There is an optimism, at least among the people I talked to.”


Apparently, Bodman managed to go to Iraq and not talk to anyone until he returned the the United States and talked to Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity and Cheney.

And now, reality!

Maj. Gen. William Caldwell, the chief military spokesman, said there had been an average of 34 attacks a day involving U.S. and Iraqi forces in and around the capital since Friday -- up sharply from the daily average of 24 registered between June 14 and July 13.

"The only way we're going to be successful in Baghdad is to get the weapons off the streets," Caldwell said. He said insurgents were streaming into the capital for "an all-out assault against the Baghdad area."


Well, if they are going to do this, I hope, for the Bush Administration's sake they do it while the media is covering Lebanon. That way we'll never know.

Here is the essence of Bush surreal politik, poke the bear with a stick until you get a rise out of him (sorry if that brings up Scooter Libby's novel) or the oft-analogized, knocking down the hornets' nest to see what happens. Shake up the status quo -- he's doing this in Lebanon-Israel now -- thinking that eventually it will be better.

The fact that this has pretty much never worked in the entire lamentable history of humanity, leaves him undeterred because "this time it will" -- even while it clearly is not.

TBogg, I believe sums it up perfectly:

It is truly stunning to survey how much damage this shallow stupid man has done to the world in six short years, and to realize that we will be picking up after his mess for generations to come while he and Laura go back to Crawford and drink their dullwitted selves into oblivion.

The Merkelization of Stumblebum McBunnypants

Know your Chimperial behaviors:


REUTERS/Jason Reed

Nah, too easy...

I have to be sporting about my cheap shots...


(AFP/Adrian Dennis)

...so make up your own goddamn K-Lo and/or John Podhoretz jokes.

My favorite part of Bush's appearance at the NAACP

Was at the very end, if some of you noticed (the Daily Show certainly did), just as the non-enthusiastic applause - and yes some boos - started the organist started playing as loudly as possible. In fact, it seems like they hired the person who plays the organ at major league baseball games.

Priorities

$30 Billion a year to keep up this shit at an ever increasing rate.

While New Orleans chokes & weezes. Much like the millions of uninsured, including children.

If you are going to watch one video by an Ice Cream mogul this year, watch this one!

I don't want to start a big film fight or anything

I don't claim to be qualified to be a film critic (I have no outrageous mustache or bad punning ability)...and I haven't seen more than the commercials from 'Lady in the Water' but...

M. Night Shyamalan -- ever thought of, oh, I don't know, not making the same movie over and over?

Maybe 'The Village' and the ending of 'Signs' have left me too bitter and biased to have any other opinion.

New from Disney!


(AP Photo/Pennywell Farm and Wildlife Centre, Catherine Tozer)
They've combined two well-loved childrens classics into one incredibly profitable pre-packed product!

Disney's 101 Babechops!



Alert Cruella DeVille

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Shorter Peggy Noonan

Science isn't science unless it agrees with me and my beliefs. Which do not come from any knowledge of science.

During the past week's heat wave--it hit 100 degrees in New York City Monday--I got thinking, again, of how sad and frustrating it is that the world's greatest scientists cannot gather, discuss the question of global warming, pore over all the data from every angle, study meteorological patterns and temperature histories, and come to a believable conclusion on these questions: Is global warming real or not? If it is real, is it necessarily dangerous? What exactly are the dangers? Is global warming as dangerous as, say, global cooling would be? Are we better off with an Earth that is getting hotter or, what with the modern realities of heating homes and offices, and the world energy crisis, and the need to conserve, does global heating have, in fact, some potential side benefits, and can those benefits be broadened and deepened? Also, if global warning is real, what must--must--the inhabitants of the Earth do to meet its challenges? And then what should they do to meet them?

You would think the world's greatest scientists could do this, in good faith and with complete honesty and a rigorous desire to discover the truth. And yet they can't. Because science too, like other great institutions, is poisoned by politics. Scientists have ideologies. They are politicized.


Perhaps the stupidest column ever written, and I'm including transcriptions from Michael Savage.

For The Love Of God

Brother Attaturk references the stunning power grab by wingnuts in the House here, and as he is apt to do, made a good bit of farce out of the vote. What is stunning is not just that these creeps want to deprive the courts of even the right to determine the constitutionality of the laws that are passed (Marbury v. Madison anyone?), but the reasons these people use are, well, off the charts:

"We should not and cannot rewrite history to ignore our spiritual heritage," said Rep. Zach Wamp (news, bio, voting record), R-Tenn. "It surrounds us. It cries out for our country to honor God."

***

Rep. Todd Akin (news, bio, voting record), R-Mo., who sponsored the measure, said that denying a child the right to recite the pledge was a form of censorship. "We believe that there is a God who gives basic rights to all people and it is the job of the government to protect those rights," he said.


I hold this truth to be self-evident: these people are fucking nuts.

A special White House gift given to the Snow Flake Babies



Of course, this is a special, shorter version...

The Important Issue o' the Day

So far this month we've seen:

1. No Cutting & Running (until we say so)
2. No Flag Burning
3. No Gay Marriage
4. No Zygote Humping

and now...

5. No pledge editing (any more, they added "under God" in 1954 to teach the commies a lesson, a lesson learned so well, it kept 'em out of Hungary...or not)

What's next on the horizon:

6. No prayer refusing
7. No thinking
8. No flirting
9. No masturbating
10. No pepper
11. No evolving

July 20th

Some pleasant memories, one of my first (though it's kind of hazy) as I couldn't fully digest it.



Or as Bush would have had it...



And twenty-five years earlier, swing and a miss.