Thursday, March 15, 2007


The Asshole we all knew planned the 9/11 attacks, and then mananged to waterboard until we somehow made him a somewhat sympathetic figure internationally, has now confessed AGAIN to what we all knew he did anyway. And the Drudge-Sirens flash and the news interrupts "a(n)d nauseum".

Khalid Ron Jeremy, er, Mohammad confessed not just to 9/11 apparently, but to more than 30 other acts and plots which were:

Attacking Chicago, attacking Los Angeles, attempting to assassinate Presidents Clinton, George H.W. Bush, and Carter. Taking part in forging the Zimmerman Telegram and writing the Protocols of the Elders of Zion; rubbing down Barry Bonds; the 18-minute gap; clubbing Jon Benet to death with Jimmy Hoffa's femur; an unauthorized biography of Howard Hughes; revealing Thers name and address to Jeff Goldstein; Piltdown Man; being the fifth dentist in the Trident commercials; trying to steal Whitney Houston away from both Bobby Brown AND Osama; the donation of Constantine; shacking up in the Pacific with Amelia Earhart; shooting Harry Whittington; being the inspiration for 'A Million Little Pieces'; molesting CNN anchorbots; not anticipating the breaching of the levees, or ironically anticipating flying planes into buildings; designing Tori Clark's suitcoats; blogging for Edwards 2008; replacing a restaurants expensive coffee with Folgers Crystals; belonging to Hannidate; that he eats aardvarks, armadillos, bears, boars, cats, bats, dawgs, hawgs, stoats, goats, yaks, and old gnus, but prefers ducks; watching "The World According to Jim"; choosing Barabas; laughing at Carrot Top; being a fugitive from OJ's justice; killing both Jerry Mathers & Mikey from the Life Cereal commericials in 'Nam; paying to see "Ishtar"; being Richard Hatch's financial advisor; plagiarizing Ben Domenech; clubbing Mrs. Richard Kimble to Death with Jimmy Hoffa's humorus bone; trying to put together a coalition of terror groups including rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers, RedState readers and Methodists; dumping Maureen Dowd because she was so clingy; and joining the John Podhoretz Handsome Man Modeling Agency.

Wow, I must certainly be compelled to forgive the Bush Administration all these fuckups now. Especially since our capture of him in Pakistan justities our invading Iraq, which we commenced a little more than two weeks later.

For Iraq we didn't need to use Khalid Shiek Mohammad, after all he's Al-Qaeda and we knew who he was and why would we do anything he said -- so long as it conflicts with Dick Cheney's position statements?

No, for Iraq we used a much more "Cheney Certified" unimpeachable source, "Curveball" aka Ahmad Chalabi's Alberto Gonzales.

“People died because of this,” said Tyler Drumheller, the former chief of European operations at the CIA, who has written about it in a new book, “On the Brink.” “All off this one little guy who all he wanted to do was stay in Germany.” Drumheller says he personally redacted all references to Curveball material in an advance draft of the Powell speech.

“We said, ‘This is from Curveball. Don’t use this,’” Drumheller says…. Drumheller also says he met personally with the then-deputy director of the CIA, John McLaughlin, to raise questions about the reliability of Curveball, well before the Powell speech.

“And John said, ‘Oh my, I hope not. You know this is all we have,’ and I said, ‘This can’t be all we have.’ I said, ‘There must be another, there must be something else.’ And he said, ‘No, this is really the only tangible thing we have.’”

Thanks to the Carpetbagger via ABC News.

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