Blowed 'em Up Real Good

In news that Big Jim McBob and Billy Sol Hurok would love, the powder keg isn't being lit just with a match but a huge torch.

A faltering political process seemed on the verge of collapse as the biggest Sunni Muslim bloc pulled out of delicate talks over the shape of Iraq's new government. Sunni politicians and clerics blamed the bloodshed on their Shiite counterparts, pushing sectarian tensions to new heights as the threat of civil war shadowed the country.
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"The Americans also abandoned us extremely. They could have put some of their vehicles to protect the mosques; they have the forces to do that," said Khalaf al-Hayan, general secretary of the Sunni Iraqi National Dialogue Council. "How does a civil war start? It starts like this."

And the chimp picks some bugs out of his wife's fur, studies it like the booger he was oh so proud to extract from his nose just moments ago (and wiped it on his chief of staff's back, laughing) ingests the bug, is handed a script to speak, forcefully, and belches a few words:

President Bush, who said the U.S. would help rebuild the Golden Mosque, today denounced the attacks on religious symbols and the ensuing violence.

"The voices of reason...understand that this bombing is intended to create civil strife, that the act was a evil act," Bush said. "The destruction of a holy site is a political act intending to create strife. And so I'm pleased with the voices of reason that have spoken out. And we will continue to work with those voices of reason to enable Iraq to continue on the path of a democracy that unites people and doesn't divide them."

I think he is on to something. If the voices of reason could just be heard over the blood curdling din of the heathens, things would just be fine. If they would only see we invaded their country for their own good, things would be just fine. If they would know that the people we have detained, tortured, and killed were not treated that way in vain, things would just be fine. Because the chimp knows in all of their hearts there is a yearning to be just like us: greedy, warmongering, sadists who need oil to grease the machinery of death.