Killing to Relax

The Washington Post discusses how Cheney likes to relax and get away by going "hunting".

Let's face it, it's not exactly like Cheney is camping out and tracking deer, elk, or wild turkey (though he may be drinking the latter). He's going to what are essentially "game breeding farms" where his quarry is caged or marked with the highest level of GPS equipment. Hence he goes to Pennsylvania and kills dozens of birds in a few hours as if they are skeet; or he goes traveling around a Texas ranch by car, only to leave the car when a known, tracked, and monitored quail covey is kept.

A short description (and a rather kiss ass one) of Cheney's activities:

The vice president's accidental shooting of a 78-year-old lawyer in Texas has thrown a spotlight on Cheney's hunting forays as never before. Hardly a casual outdoorsman posing for election brochure pictures, Cheney proves to be a serious practitioner of the sport who in five years in office has traveled to lodges throughout the country -- Texas, South Dakota, Georgia, South Carolina, Pennsylvania, New York, Maryland, Arkansas and Louisiana. Some of those "undisclosed locations" he has been at since Sept. 11, 2001, turn out to have plenty of quail, ducks, pheasant or even, yes, doves.

Change the order a bit and it sounds like Daffy Duck reading the label of the box the Tasmanian Devil is kept in. And how symbolic that Cheney likes to shoot up the proverbial animal symbolizing peace?

There's little challenge it appears to many of Cheney's hunts other than accuracy. And, in a microcosm of Bush Administration Policy we all know that Cheney may not always hit his intended target, but he's damn good at inflicting collateral damage.

Harry Whittington equals 100,000 plus Iraqi civilians.

several hunting companions say the trips include more political gossiping and storytelling than horse-trading. While women sometimes come along, such as Armstrong and Pamela Pitzer Willeford, the U.S. ambassador to Switzerland who was also at the Texas ranch a weekend ago, Lynne Cheney does not seem to be a regular on these trips. But the famously taciturn vice president reportedly opens up after a day in the open [ed. and does Ms. Willeford also open up...like a flower?]

"It's a completely different person," Graham said. "When he's in a meeting, he's the ultimate sit-back-and-listen guy. I've been in meetings with him when he seldom uttered a word. . . . But when he gets out into the field, he relaxes and it shows."

Added Chambliss, "He's a pretty loose guy when he has the chance to kick back. It's not that he's bubbling over by any means, but he's willing to share his experiences."

Like a serial killer, Cheney is a mousey, taciturn man, until he has a chance to exercise his need to slaughter. The ability to work out his proclivity for bloodlust -- something that probably developed when he didn't get a chance to 'Napalm the 'Cong'' -- relaxes Cheney for a while. At least until the urge to kill, kill, and kill some more develops.

Now admittedly, Atta J. Turk is not much of a hunter, or an outdoors type, for that matter. I love nature, I just don't like killing it. Nevertheless, I have nothing against hunting, in fact, I see its usefulness. Especially in areas where it is used as part of population control. I don't like the idea of shooting deer, elk, bear, pheasant, quail etcetera. But if you are going to hunt, as a person getting back to nature, at least fucking do the requisites of hunting. No hunter I know, and I know more than a few, thinks that going to game farms to shoot is really hunting. It's the bloodier version of going to the driving range and calling it golfing.

Actual hunting involves tracking the animal (or in some cases waiting patiently for it to come to you), working to get the animal, and using an instrument that will quickly dispatch it.

Cheney apparently at least obeys the last of those ideas, using ammo that will blow up a quail like fierworks comprised of blood and organs.

And all these shotgun slaughters/fund raising trips they don't cost we the "taxpayers" anything right? Sadly, no:

While Cheney pays any hunting fees or lodging expenses if charged, taxpayers invariably pick up much of the cost of Cheney's hunting hobby. As with his predecessors, the government pays for Secret Service agents, military aides and the rest of the entourage that travels with vice presidents wherever they go, as well as the expense of Air Force Two. But it is not clear how much that costs. The budget lists $1 million for the vice president's annual travel, including his official duties, but the figure is rounded to the nearest million, according to the Center for Public Integrity.

We're paying at least $1 million annually so Cheney can go kill animals by the bushel and raise millions more in campaign donations. God bless America, right?



And in conclusion...

[Saxby] Chambliss, who spoke with Cheney after a meeting with senators last week, said the vice president seemed distressed over the Whittington accident. "He said, 'You know, I've never felt so bad about anything in my life,' " Chambliss recalled. "He was really emotional about it."

Gee Dick, if you weren't a sociopath, you know what you would feel really shitty about?

THIS, you fucker, THIS!!!