There can be only ONE...user of a secluded location

Hey kids, just so you know -- you may use this to track Santa.

But so is Dick Cheney.

And he's fucking armed to the teeth.

You kids outside of the Northeast and mid-Atlantic states are going to have to settle for Mom & Dad eating those cookies and feeling each other up, or discussing the terms of the divorce (don't worry, they actually do blame you).

So, Happy Holidays then.