Never Enough

Obviously, the cognitive behavioral therapy I am undergoing in an attempt to deal with my masochism is not yet working. You see, I watched "Morning Joe" again today and I'm sitting here watching "Hardball" right now.

With regard to Reverend Wright ... I did not see him on Moyers. I did not see his speech before the National Press Club. And I did not see Obama's most recent denunciation/renunciation/rejection/repudiation of Wright. But after watching the aforementioned horror shows, I can tell you one thing.

Whatever Obama said, it will never be enough.

Obama could murder Wright at a place where three roads meet live on national television during an "American Idol" finale station break and it wouldn't be enough for the dingbat denizens of that once-charming island of Nantucket. Why, I can hear the Bobbleheads clinking their glasses and gnashing their teeth at the next gathering on Jack and Suzy's deck as they prep for the Sunday shows.

TWEETY: Does anyone really think Obama put this Wright thing to bed with that speech?

JOESCAR: Well, he killed him, but he didn't stamp on the corpse afterward.

MRS. GREENSPAN: He could have burned the corpse, too. And he didn't.

TIMMEH: Yes, I don't know that he really went as far as he needed to go. He could have thrown the ashes in the sewer.

TWEETY: So it's like that movie "Superbad." The kids trash the cop car. Then they burn it. Then they shoot at it. Should Obama have gone "Superbad" on Reverend Wright?

FINE-MAN: "Superbad" sounds an awful lot like "Superfly" and that's an association I don't think Barack Obama wants to make in minds of white rural voters.

COKIE: Oh, dear, I hope Obama hasn't overplayed his hand.

TWEETY: Guys! He killed the guy in Times Square!

JOESCAR: In New York, Chris. Why, he was practically on the Upper West Side!

MRS. GREENSPAN: Joe's got a point. Why didn't Obama murder Wright in Indiana? It would have played better with those non-college-educated voters he needs to attract.

JOESCAR: Why, he might as well have been carrying a latte instead of a knife.

TWEETY: And not even a Dunkin' Donuts latte! It was a Starbucks latte. Why can't Barack Obama get it right?

CHARLES DeWOLFE GIBSON: What are all those middle class people -- the ones struggling on $200,000 a year -- going to say about this? They're very wary of a black man wielding a weapon.

TIMMEH: Joe just reminded me -- he killed Wright with a knife, not with a gun. What does that say to all the Second Amendment enthusiasts out there?

COKIE: Tim's got a point. He's got a problem with gun owners. He needs to embrace those people, and I think he missed a big opportunity here.

TWEETY: And did you see what he was wearing? A suit! HA! Why can't he just dress like a regular guy does when he goes out to murder his pastor? I mean, put on a hunting jacket, for Christ's sake. Would it kill the guy to pick up something from Carhartt or even L.L. Bean? I don't know...

COKIE: Chris is right. The question is, "Why can't Barack Obama make us all feel better about the choices available to the little -- oops! I mean, regular people?"

MRS. GREENSPAN: What's more, this is a flip-flop. First Obama embraced Wright. Then he denounced him. Then he double-denounced him. Then he murders him. Is he for Wright? Against Wright? Really against Wright? Which is it?

TIMMEH: If he's going to equivocate on a pastor, what's he going to do with Ahmadinejad? He needs to make a pledge ...

COKIE: If Obama murdered his Christian pastor, what does that do with regard to the rumors that he's a secret Muslim? I mean, it bolsters them, doesn't it?

CHARLES DeWOLFE GIBSON: It certainly doesn't help him with middle-class Americans earning $200,000 per year. I mean, things are hard for these people. And Obama makes everything he does look so easy.

FINE-MAN: True. I noticed that he hadn't even broken a sweat as he was stabbing Wright to death. So how can the American People be blamed for asking themselves, "Has Obama had it too easy?"

TWEETY: Wouldn't it have resonated more with Christian voters for Obama to have crucified Wright? This is a Christian nation, after all ...

COKIE: But Jewish voters would have been offended, and with Obama's stance on Israel, oh dear, he just can't afford to alienate anyone at this point.

FINE-MAN: I just wish he'd kicked the corpse or something. Just to really let us know he really meant it.

TWEETY: Is Wright Obama's Osama? I mean, is this the guy who's always going to be elusive, out there taunting Obama from a pulpit in Chicago instead of a cave on the Pakistan border?

JOESCAR: Look. We're missing the overall. How do we know that Wright and Obama didn't set this whole thing up? They were thick as thieves, those two, why Wright ...