Pointing out the Obvious

Q: Where was it yesterday that Dick Cheney threatened to shoot Iran in the face?

A: The AIPAC conference.


Q: Hey, wasn't AIPAC affliated with some Bush Administation dude involved in illegal espionage?

A: Why yes, Timmy, that person would be Larry Franklin.


Q: Well, it's not like they have any relationship with anyone in the media right?

A: You mean like Leslie "Wolf" Blitzer? Last seen telling us that Dubai isn't such a bad government to manage ports because they are just "marginally" anti-semitic as opposed to Goebbels-like anti-semitic.


Q: Gee, that's why Cheney would go to AIPAC to say bad stuff against Iran.

A: That's a statement, not a question Timmy. I'll have you stop such behavior now, as it is only I who can make such categorical statements.


Q: Sorry, you mean only ask questions like this?

A: That's right Timmy, only ask questions. But not hard questions, because this is just a literary device.

Q: Like Penthouse Forum?

A: Look, I've only had two letters published there in 20 years, but it's a publication dammit! Besides, I really was at a small liberal arts university in the midwest.


Q: But was the woman?

A: Look, Timmy, your questions are starting to annoy me.



Q: Sorry.

A: Once again, not a question. Since you cannot follow the format, I'm afraid that I will have to end this fabricated conversation.


Q: Sorry dude. But it's only because you are so damn handsome, funny, intelligent and hung like a horse.

A: And?


Q: You have six-pack abs and enjoy nothing so much as rubbing a woman's back and feet.

A: And?


Q: *Sigh* You have the soul of a poet.

A: Well done fictional Timmy.


Dana Milbank, who Timmy would like to add is not hung like a horse, has more:

During a luncheon speech yesterday at the convention center, Daniel Gillerman, the Israeli ambassador to the United Nations, shouted a barnyard obscenity involving a bull when he dismissed the theory that Iran and Hamas might soften their anti-Israel views. The audience gave Gillerman a standing ovation.

Daniel Gillerman, Israel's ambassador to the United Nations, called the annual meeting of AIPAC "the greatest guarantee and insurance policy for the survival of Israel." (By Mike Segar -- Reuters)

The undiplomatic diplomat went on to describe a war on radical Islam: "While it may be true -- and probably is -- that not all Muslims are terrorists, it also happens to be true that nearly all terrorists are Muslim."

Once again, the Ann Coulter school of diplomacy appears at the same location Cheney has been. I wonder why Muslims get so pissed off at the West? I mean other than the crusades, imperialism, bigotry, economic exploitation, support of repressive monarchies, and bombing them, what the hell has the West ever done to them?

But ask people at this week's gathering about Steve Rosen, the father of modern AIPAC, who goes on trial next month for disseminating classified information, and you get the sort of look you'd expect if you inquired about an embarrassing medical condition.

Much like if you asked Ann Coulter about her recent vasectomy.

I would like to apologize for daring to post something critical of AIPAC, because after all that must make me anti-semitic.

Q: But still an anti-semitic that is damn handsome, funny, intelligent, giving, with sex-pack abs and the soul of a poet? Oh, and hung like a horse.

A: Exactly, Timmy, exactly.