If you're like me, and I know I am, you'll never remember where you were when you found out Anna Nicole Smith died. In fact, soon you will likely forget she died, or even lived. Though, I'm sure that no CNN viewer will ever forgive the network for their insane coverage of her death, it was as manic as their coverage of Henry Kissinger's death. Oh, sorry, wishes got ahead of reality there. Hours and hours of consecutive coverage on the death of a person that, if you're like me, had absolutely no effect upon your life or culture, other than being the perfect vapid reflection of it.
As another half-dozen American soldiers died, almost unmentioned, as another hundred million went down the rat-hole of inevitable failure; CNN was there to comfort us as a nation, to allow us to feel our palpable sense of non-loss. Never has so much been made over something so little. I'm just glad that Wolf Blitzer was there to tell me that I am shocked and dismayed. Larry King was on to dot-dot-dot her life and eulogize her in a manner befitting a Pope.
In fact, thanks to CNN, I know that being shocked and dismayed is akin to deep feelings of annoyance. Because during the non-stop coverage of the event I was pretty sure that I was incredibly annoyed throughout. But no, Wolf told me that I was shocked and dismayed. I await Chris Matthews breathless malaprops during the "modest" State Funeral.
Why I haven't been so shocked since Charo or Rockwell died.
I shudder to think what CNN will be like when Carrot-Top leaves our mortal coil.
Um, Wikipedia informs me that both Charo and Rockwell are still alive, though I still don't know who is watchin' the latter, perhaps the IRS?