Atta J. Turk predicts so you don't have to punish yourself

The Chimperor Disgustus will hold yet another non-responsive News Conference at 10:00 a.m. eastern. Why watch at all? Here is the condensed transcript:

"The 'murican people gotta understand we will prevail against these terrorist killers and that we are fighting them over there so we don't have to fight them over here like what happened on 9/11 which is a lesson I'll never forget, even though the lesson is hard, and by the way we will prevail. I'm the Commander-in-Decider-in-American People Protector-in-Chief.

Nice dress Martha; you too Gregory. heh heh heh"

picture from BBC via AP

UPDATE:

It's over, and my parody wasn't parody enough to do it justice.

Early on he "encouraged" all of us to "go shopping". And that was the high point.

It's like he's forcing us to take that mushroom trip back to 2001/2002 with him.