Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Thanks Hollywood

I see now, that despite your demonstration in "Armageddon" that oil-rig drillers could save the Earth from Asteroids, they cannot save the Earth from oil-rigs.

No, that Hollywood Principal was trumped by the other one, Black President equals "we're all going to die" like in "Deep Impact" -- unless it means you unite the country and win the Rugby World Cup -- or was that just because the black President was also God?

3 comments:

jimmiraybob said...

Up until recently I had no idea how hard this whole thing has hit some of the victims, like BP CEO Tony Hayward. I just don't know how piling on helps when brave but overwhelmed environmental activists like him are just trying to get back on their feet - to just get their lives back.

Sleep has been interrupted. Sometimes he's had to stand outdoors in the merciless sun...and the humidity, do you know how humid it gets down in the Gulf? For Christ's sake, he has missed dinner engagements. Now, more than ever he needs us to pull together in full support.

To that end I offer, for free, a marketing idea that can get all the free loading fishermen that cause Mr. Haywood so much pain back to work - the New & Improved Program.

"Jumbo Gulf Shrimp, now with more BTUs."

"Fresh crab, who needs the butter?"

"Our seafood gumbo will blow your socks off."

"Get your Oil, What Oil? crawdadies here."

I just hope that Mr. Hayward, and all the BP board, the executives and middle management that stand on the rigs, can someday return to their gated communities as whole and productive people.

[This has been another edition of How do we Help our Idiots]

pansypoo said...

get your fish pre-blackened.

on NPR some LA big wigs wanted us to pity off shore drillers who can't work right now.

Major Woody said...

You're a genius, you've just come up with the plot for the newest hit disaster movie! It's called Noddegamra. Here's the plot: the earth is threatened by a rogue oil rig that no one can stop. At the last minute, a plucky asteroid (played by Bruce Willis) comes to the rescue, smashing into the Gulf and shutting down the runaway rig. Yippie kai yay, muthufukkas! It also causes 95% of the species alive on the earth to become extinct, but hey, we were headed in that direction already.