Double Douchebag

As if it wasn't outrageous enough that Cheney was off yesterday at a fund raiser for a guy up on a felony charge, the White House now intends to inflict the nation's number one torturer on returning troops.

First, the trip deep into the heart of Tex-ass:

ELECTIONS '06HOUSTON – Vice President Dick Cheney headlined a campaign fundraiser for U.S. Rep. Tom DeLay on Monday, an appearance derided by Democrats as highlighting Mr. DeLay's vulnerability but welcomed by Republicans as a show of White House loyalty to an unjustly maligned GOP stalwart.

The event came hours after a judge dismissed one of the charges against Mr. DeLay but let others stand. The Sugar Land Republican declined to talk about the case with reporters as he arrived for the fundraiser at a hotel on Houston's west side. The event – a reception where Mr. Cheney spoke, followed by a dinner – was closed to the media.

People who attended the reception said Mr. Cheney's message was upbeat, recalling 20 years of legislation passed by Mr. DeLay and other Republicans, including tax cuts. And a positive outcome was predicted for Iraq, according to Harris County Tax Assessor Paul Bettencourt.

Second, and then to torture our troops:

Vice President Dick Cheney, the point man in the administration's counteroffensive against war critics, to greet troops recently back from Iraq as part of a concerted effort to shore up slumping public support for the war.

Cheney was traveling Tuesday to Fort Drum in northern New York to speak at a rally for the Army's 10th Mountain Division and the New York Army National Guard's 42nd Infantry Division.

The Troy, N.Y.-based 42nd Infantry, whose commander oversaw a task force of 24,000 troops in north-central Iraq, had about 3,500 guardsmen return home in November.

The vice president's appearances, which include a rally and a sit-down with troops, are part of a series of speeches by top administration officials intended to spell out U.S. goals in Iraq more clearly in the run-up to Iraq's Dec. 15 elections to pick a permanent government.

They come as polls show President Bush's approval rating at the lowest of his presidency: 37 percent in a recent AP-Ipsos poll, with a majority of Americans now saying the war was a mistake.

You've just got home from your third tour of Iraq, all you want to do is get home to a home cooked meal, sex with your wife and all that post-traumatic stress disorder. But do you get to go home? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. You have to stick around so the human colostomy bag who sent you over there -- giving you the gift of MREs, no sex, and PTSD -- can do a photo-op with you. What could be better?