"Moderate, like me"

Op-Ed Columnist

A Moderate Manifesto

By DAVID BROOKS

Published: March 2, 2009

Hi, I'm David Brooks. You may know me from such publications as the Weekly Standard and as the conservative columnist in the New York Times. Others may know me as the insufferably milquetoasty and unctuous stuffed-shirt on the Newshour with Jim Lehrer every Friday.

Over these many years you've read, if not enjoyed, my many "thoughts" about how those who criticized the architects of Bush's foreign policy were anti-semitic - especially the Jews. You've heard me tell you that in the American heartland, that I never visit, everyone is simple, yet fecund, and enjoys talking about low taxes with no evolution in their schools over their non-existent Applebee's Salad Bar. But most of all, you've heard me sing the praises of Edmund Burke, who I really must read some day, and Milton Friedman, him too.

Therefore, it may come as a mild-surprised that I have surveyed the political landscape and realized I, David Brooks, am the most moderate of men. The most temperate, the most sober, the tallest, the most fit, the smartest, the most tasteful (look at my lovely pink shirt), the most handsome, the wittiest, and of, course, the most modest of men as well as the most moderate.

You know, it's all rather awesome, and typically altruistic of me to inform you of this.

Because that's how I roll.

You're welcome.