Thursday, May 08, 2008

From Beer to Paternity (Part I)

VITO: Hi, honey.
MRS. VITO: Fuck you, you filthy WOP. You're going to pay for this.
VITO: I know. What's for dinner?
MRS VITO: For you? Merdecotta!
VITO: Ah, it's reverse Passover -- this night is no different from other nights.
MRS. VITO: (hits him in head with rolling pin). In the words of America's greatest jurist, Vaffanculo!
VITO: Will you keep your voice down? The whole neighborhood can hear you.
MRS. VITO: I don't care if Guy Molinari, the ghost of Paul Castellano, and the Pope can hear me. Where's that putana of yours and her miserable brat! I'll fix you all!
VITO: I’m outta here. Where's my wedding band?
MRS. VITO: What the fuck do you care, stronz?
VITO: Come on, I gotta go.
MRS. VITO: Where? Back to the bar to break a few more tables? Or back to your gummar to break a few more hearts? What do you need that wedding band for anyway?
VITO: Can't go up to the Hill without the band or the flag pin.
MRS. VITO: Stick the flag pin up your ass, Vito. I'm calling Raoul Felder!
VITO: Oo fa!
MRS. VITO: You mean "Oo faTHER," asshat. Get out your checkbook, Vito! This is gonna cost you.
Credit where credit is due: "From Beer to Paternity"
Title by Attaturk
Dialogue by res ipsa loquitur
Inspired by Vito Fossella (R - Of Course), who voted to impeach Bill Clinton and who now has troubles of his own.
Hey! Here's Vito on impeachment back in a simpler time (1998). Guess one of the "Americans yet unborn" to which he refers is now his illegitimate kid.
. . . Earlier today, one of my colleagues said that this would be the most divisive issue since the Vietnam War. While he may believe that to be true, I take strong exception with that, and I'll tell you why. Men and women were sent overseas like every other war or military conflict since our nation's birth, to defend the rule of law, the notions of personal freedom and individual liberty.

And in the case before us today, we're asking a simple question: "Did the president of the United States violate any of those rules of law that we cherish and that so many men and women have died for and are willing to die for at every point around the globe?"

I don't want to be here today, like so many of my colleagues. But the generations of Americans yet unborn must look back on this day in this matter, in this situation, and see this as our finest hour. . . . Reluctantly, I am here. I proudly, though, support this resolution.

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