If Teddy Roosevelt was Channelling Bull(shit) Moose

Marshall Whitmann, proprietor of "Bullshit Moose" had quite a doozey yesterday. In addition to a propensity for referring to himself in the third person, Bullshit is also showing himself to be a pretty poor self-proclaimed representative of Theodore Roosevelt. If Roosevelt had Bullshit writing his speaches we'd have these quotes to chew over:

Speak ineffectually and cowtow to a big prick; you will lose elections.

Character, in the long run, is an overrated factor in the life of an individual and of nations alike.

It is hard to fail, but it is better to have never to tried to succeed.

The human body has two ends on it: one to create with and one to sit on. Sometimes people get their ends reversed. When this happens they become a blogger claiming my legacy

The best thing is soft hitting. Do not hit at all if it can be avoided; but always hit softly.

And of course, best he re-write his most enduring speech...

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually avoids the arena, whose face is not all icky with dust and sweat and blood; who lies valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, then lies about all the lack of effort, error and shortcomings; but who does not actually strive to do deeds; who manipulates the great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who lies unashamedly about what seems a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of stealing an election or two, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while lying greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and turgid souls who died so he can lie about defeat.

Despite the fact that the majority of the American public believes that the Bush Administration purposefully misled us in selling the Iraq Invasion, Bullshit has one simple strategy...

Don't mention the War!!!

Oh, there's some wisdom.