Monday, November 30, 2009

A few thoughts from Mike Huckabee

People of America, I really think you need to pay attention to more important stories:

Hey, that Tiger Woods guy, we really must pay more attention to him.

And that Brangelina, I know it's sinful, but I really want to hear about the wild sex between a liberal, laid back stoner, and a crazy mean right-wing hottie with an adoption fetish. MUST HEAR MORE!

And those White House Gate-Crashers, surely we should all find out more about this -- plus they have a muslimy name and stuff. They must have gotten in because they have Obama's real gift certificate, huh, huh?!! Look into it.

Is David Letterman still bonkin' his Bill Clinton, praise Jesus, let us wonder incessently about this.

And hey, how about that Grey Cup game? That was pretty awesome -- it should really be a national obsession. Do you think we could get Brett Favre and Tim Tebow to play up there?

...say, what if I told you, Brett Favre and Tim Tebow shared a forbidden and very sinful soul kiss early on the morning of November 27th in a residential area of Windermere, Florida?

And all of these things also involved a hooker from A.C.O.R.N.!

Thanks for your time,

Yours in Christ and Beck
Mike Huckabee,

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