If I was a person of high standards

I wouldn't write about politicians' kids...but some of you people have been reading this blog for six years...you know high-standards are beneath me.

Willow [Palin] has been running with the wrong crowd... They are a popular high school clique known as the Colony Girls, who are well known as hard partiers and are regularly involved in underage drinking and smoking dope.

That's the National Enquirer there...and John Edwards' private parts tell me this must be credible (and when they go after the Obama girls in a few years I shall be outraged, I tells ya', OUTRAGED!)

Meanwhile, back at the ranch...

It is December, 2009. Willow Palin and her Colony Girls throw a super sweet party at a house they know is for sale. Willow, apparently, is the one who leads them to the house. The rager is so epic it caused "between twenty to thirty thousand dollars in damage," according to the Immoral Minority.

The lock had been forced, five wooden doors had been so badly damaged they needed to be replaced, the walls and floors had been gouged with knives, and vodka and orange juice containers were strewn all over the house. It also appeared that sexual activity had taken place on some of the beds, and a computer, some winter gear, and clothing had all been stolen.

Chip off the ol' block she is! Sarah, interview Willow and share her inspiring American Story of Success with us on FoxNews...I understand you now have an opening!

Hey Doll, Merry Doll
Ring-a-ding-a-dillow
My mom's famous now
So give your shit to Willow!