Friday, June 24, 2005

A Short Phone Call from the Oval Office

*phone rings*

General Myers: Hello, Richard Myers.

Mr. Preznit: Is this Batman?

General Myers: No, Mr. President, once again, this is not Batman.

Mr. Preznit: I was noticing, I have not seen a "bat signal" against the night sky. I think that would be cool -- don't you think that would be cool General?

General Myers: Um, sure, I guess Mr. President. I suppose I could look into it.

Mr. Preznit: And I'd like it with one of those special extra bright search light things, and make sure its a really bad-ass bat thing, looking real tough. And when it flashes, I'll take the motorcade over, and people will know that George W. President is Batman, not Bruce Wayne.

General Myers: Yes sir.

Mr. Preznit: Bruce Wayne, sounds like the name of a liberal, some secularist wussy boy. Like John Forbes Kerry. Sounds like a defeatest 'murica hater.

General Myers: Ok.

Mr. Preznit: And see that we get a nice Orange and green suit for Dick Cheney will you General.

General Myers: Yes sir.

Mr. Preznit: But that is not the main reason I called.

General: What can I help you with sir?

Mr. Preznit: Well, General, Rummy brought me over some letters that the troops in Eye-rack that he said were written to me. But a lot of them seem to be addressed to somebody over at that there Big Building you work in, what's it called?

General: The Pentagon sir.

Mr. Preznit: Now, general I don't need to here any of that pagan crap. Anyhow, do you have, I guess he is known formally as, a "Commander Richard Weed"?

General: I'll check my records, although I don't know why a mid-level naval officer would get a lot of mail. ... I don't see one Mr. President.

Mr. Preznit: 'Cause there's an awful lot of letters that start out, Dear Commander Dick Weed, or just Hey Dick Weed. Frankly, I am also surprised at their punctuation problems too. Anyway, I'll send them back over to you.

General: Very good Mr. President.

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