Redux

Apparently since Viggo Mortenson came to Crawford today, to see Cindy Sheehan, it is a good time to recycle this post from August 26, 2004:

Another stranger comes knocking on the door at the Ranch...


*knock, knock*

Trough closed door...

Karl Rove: Who's there?
Stranger: Jesus
Karl Rove: Jesus, Who?
Stranger: Jesus Christ, Let me in! [cue rimshot]*

Karl Rove: Jesus Christ, the son of God?
Stranger: In a manner of speaking, yes.
Karl Rove: Go away, we've already got one.
Stranger: Already got one?
Karl Rove: Yes, the President.
Stranger: His father is George Herbert Walker Bush.
Karl Rove: No, no. That is just his lower father.
Stranger: Lower father?
Karl Rove: Hey, it's a meme.
Stranger: Meme? Blessed are the truth-speakers, they shall be awarded with honor.
Karl Rove: This may surprise you, but I don't follow.
Stranger: Look, can I see the owner of the house, if it be not you?
Karl Rove: Look, he's in the back quiver..., I mean busy. Maybe one of his kids can help. Jenna, or not-Jenna? Come here please. [clicky footsteps]

[door opens a crack]

Jenna: Um, hello.
Stranger: Is your father in?
Jenna: Are you, like, a hippy?
Stranger: Um.
Jenna: 'Cause I think your look is pretty cool. Really retro.
Stranger: Thank you. But I came to see your father.
Jenna: You mean my 'lower father'?
Stranger: The man who helped give you life?
Jenna: That would be Ashton Kutcher, he had some strong green.
Stranger: Please, I have a list of commandments and advice to give your father.
Jenna: Say, weren't you in "Lord of the Rings"?
Stranger: What?
Jenna: Do you know Orlando Bloom? Not-Jenna and I think he is sooooo hot!
Stranger: I know of him.
Jenna: Say, aren't you like Gay in real life Gandalf-guy?
Stranger: What?
Jenna: 'Cause I have nothing against that sort of thing, I'm cool with it.
Stranger: Look, I just need to see your father, George.
Jenna: Whoa, chill there Hippy dude, I'll go tell him. [click sounds]

[A moment Later]

Jenna: Look, I think you are fine and all, but Dad is on the phone to Franklin Graham and wants you to wait outside for a bit until he shows up. Later, dude, tell Viggo I think he is really, really hot too.

[Door Slams]




*I kill...and resurrect me.