The Continuing Adventures of Rudy & Judy (Part X - The End)

This evening -- the Upper East Side...

RUDY: "So, what's on the agenda for tonight?"

JUDI: (doesn't look up; flips through Hamptons magazine) "Agenda?"

RUDY: "Yeah. What are we doing tonight?"

JUDI: "'We,' Rudy? What do you mean 'We?'" (dog-ears page advertising $12 million ocean-front property in Amagansett)

RUDY: "We" as in me and you, Judi. Come on, what's it going to be? Elaine's? Dinner with Volpe? Party with the chairman of the Manhattan Institute? What's that guy's name? We hear from McCain?"

JUDI: "Rudy, I don't know what 'we're' doing, but I know what I'm doing."

RUDY: "What are you talking about, Judi? Come on, I need to get ready."

JUDI "For what? You haven't got any plans."

RUDY: "No plans? What are you talking about? We have plans every Saturday night."

JUDI: "Not any more 'we' don't. But I do."

RUDY: "Okay, I've had enough, Judi. What gives?"

JUDI: "Rudy, you don't get it, do you. You're a Loser now. You dropped out. Screwed the pooch. You're done. Loser: L-O-S-E-R. Do you think any of these people want to hang with a Loser?"

RUDY: "Oh bullshit. They were friends before, they'll be... "

JUDI: "Ex-friends now. Who don't want to hang with a loser. Do you think John and Theresa Kerry got many invitations after 2004? What about Jimmy and Roslyn Carter after 1980? Hell, George H.W. and Barbara skulked off to Kennebunkport and spent so much time on the golf course the that that battle ax morphed into a lizard."

RUDY: "Judy, I'm America's May..."

JUDI: "You're America's Loser, Rudy. $50 million dollars for one lousy delegate? I swear to Christ, I could have gotten you elected for half that..."

RUDY: "And used the other half to buy a few more tiaras."

JUDI: "Fuck you, Rudy. You've ruined my life. Go back to banging your press secretary on the desk on mother's day. I've had enough."

RUDY: "Take it easy baby. I'll run for public office again and we'll do it right this time."

JUDI: "No Rudy. It's over. You're finished. Governor of New York? Not a gig for losers, George Pataki notwithstanding. Senator? Not a gig for losers, Al D'Amato, notwithstanding. They won't have you as mayor again, loser. And what about that half-assed consulting firm of yours? Who wants a LOSER telling them what to do?"'

RUDY: "Hey, I've got a packed schedule of speaking engagements."

JUDI: "You had a packaged schedule of speaking engagements. No one wants to hear from a LOSER. You'll be lucky if you get a gig in front of the Prostate Cancer Survivor's League. Now get out of my way. I've got to get ready."

RUDY: "Where are you going?"

JUDI: "I've got dinner."

RUDY: "With who?"

JUDI: "With whom, Loser."

RUDY: "'With whom,' Judi."

JUDI: "With Raoul Felder, that's who. Good night, Rudy. Don't wait up. And by the way, I hear that "Election" is on TMC tonight. Watch it and see how a real candidate gets the job done."

And you may ask yourself, "Well, how did we get here?" Parts I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII and IX