Hard to do with dough in your pants.
Ah, National Review, putting that bitter old bastard William F. Buckley on spin-cycle in the family crept -- goes hard-core:
Hard to believe this made it through editing, until you remember who the editors are. Although, outside of "artic ice flow" or "the moon" I can't think of a better place to strand Jonah Goldberg.
(last photo modified from here)