Wednesday, April 21, 2010

A Model Republican (and Tor Johnson impersonator)

Via Wonkette, we find actual cartoon people (with very very small penises I wager) running as...wait for it...a Republican!

Policy planks (other than having a larger penis):

KEY ISSUES (again, other than penis size)

* It is my passionate, intense and burning
desire to attack and annihilate that
monstrous national debt, the biggest
threat by far to our dearly beloved
children and grandchildren. We owe
it to them to pass along a DEBT-FREE
USA. I would be absolutely delighted
to lead the charge against this enemy
of us all (and have a larger penis).
* I believe that well over 90% of what the
Feds do today is unconstitutional and
should be eliminated by We the People.
The sooner (my penis is just average-sized) the better!
* Mighty War Department (for overcompensation purposes, of course).

[And out of the other Armed Forces too] -- and airport bathrooms and from comparing their penis-size to mine.

* Combat is NO place for women (what with my small penis and all)
* Proud LIFE member NRA (have I mentioned, overcompensating?)


Montag said...

Ah, exactly what America needs at this crucial point in its history--another old fat fuck sitting in front of his television watching Fox News, cleaning his gun during commercials and imagining, hope against hope, that he's got a chance with Sarah Palin.

America deserves to get what it most wants, even if that includes Harley D. Brown....

StonyPillow said...

Another Republican engineer -- this guy would fit right in with my coworkers. Seriously.

Major Woody said...

I don't see anything unusual about this guy. He's just a regular Republican with "censorship mode" set to "off".

Raoul Paste said...

Its wrong and stereotypical to say this, but....that guy looks like he doesn't normally wear a suit and tie.

jimmiraybob said...

...We the People...

I'm really growing tired and cranky at the misuse of this expression and the attempted appropriation of patriotic righteousness by know-nothings angry people. Roughly translated:

'We the 5-15% of the American population who are really pissed off and that don't like democracy and that don't want to yield to the desires of the majority of Americans that properly voted, per our Constitution, Democratic and for Obama's positive vision and who will keep on loudly spouting uninformed crap and yelling and carrying automatic weapons to the public square until we can foment enough civil strife that we can roll the nation back to the 1950s, the 11th century, 30AD Nazareth, or maybe better yet the 6th century BC Jewish republic ruled by judges with the Bible as our Constitution (sans the Jews naturally)"

Morbo said...

I'm a fortunate engineer here in an office where it's half Democrat. The libertarian of the group though lives up to all stereotypes thereof.

pansypoo said...

does he have a truck?

Anonymous said...

Outlaw such hate speech as Canada did and shut these rabblerousers up.

guessed said...

nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.

guessed said...

hey, i'm all for nuking canada.