Coming Soon to the CNN Family of Networks

"For a quarter-century you've relied on CNN as the place for quality news reports from "Capital Junta", to "Crosswire", to "Larry King:Still Alive" you count on us.

When you walk through an airport, or are waiting for the oil in your car to be changed, you get your news reports from CNN: Headline News.

Now, from the same network that brought you CNN:Sports Illustrated comes the newest addition to our lineup of quality, hard-hitting, news programming.

Coming in September, "the CNN: PREGNANT, MURDERED WHITE WOMEN and CELEBRITIES ACCUSED OF RAPE Channel, CNN:PMWM&CAR News."

All the stories that the current cable news networks only give you 18 hours a day, will now come to you 24 Hours a Day, 7 Days a Week.

From now on, when a Pregnant Woman, hopefully attractive, but definitely White, is Killed; when a Celebrity, hopefully black, is accused of the stereotypical crime of having sex with White Women -- who hopefully become pregnant and are then murdered; the name you trust for news will be there ALL THE TIME.

CNN, there are no limits, to what we will tell you that you are interested in.

Catch it this September!"



Yes, it's parody.

Or is it?